Unofficial Commander

Chapter 12: Good Soldiers Follow Orders

It had been a couple more weeks when they received a transmission telling the group to head to Kaller. It didn't take long after the team arrived that they saw some action. They took care of a few squads of droids when a Jedi Padawan approached them. He explained where his master and the battalion were, and they desperately needed help. As he took off, another droid squad showed up to their position.

Macawi ignited her sabers, smirking at the others.

"Go help the kid, I got this."

They nodded, going after him. Crosshair waited an extra moment before following. She turned back to the droids, ready for some fun. She spent a few minutes slicing up the droids, electrocuting the last one; just for fun. She took her time to catch up with the others, feeling strange all of a sudden. She saw a trail from a boulder and slid down the steep hill.

She saw the other Batchers advancing and started to run after them before slowly coming to a stop. Something felt very wrong. She heard blasters firing and turned towards the sound. She saw the clones turning on the Jedi general. She saw the padawan running towards them, and then the general yelling for him to run. Her chest turned tight, feeling an extreme amount of pain rushing through the force.

Macawi saw Hunter and Crosshair go after the kid. She took a step towards them when a couple of the regs spotted her, firing at her. She dodged the lasers, taking a look at Tech, Echo, and Wrecker before running as well.

The clones had run after her but had quickly given up. She slouched against a tree, out of breath. The pain and grief she was feeling was overwhelming, and she kept pushing it back. Tech had tried calling her over the comm but she dumped it when he did. She assumed the worst from them as well. If they were looking for her she figured Hunter would find her first. She would protect herself if she had to, but when she looked at her hands she was shaking. Just the thought of having to kill any of them horrified her.

She heard the crunching of snow and peeked around the tree, surprised to see Crosshair and not Hunter.

"I know you're there," Crosshair stated.

She stepped out, lightsaber in hand. His gun was raised at her, but he seemed too relaxed to be ready to shoot.

"What's going on?" She took a half step towards him, only to stop when he shifted. He was ready to fire now.

"Crosshair, talk to me, please."

He kept adjusting like he kept changing his mind.

"The Jedi have committed treason, they're to be wiped out."

That's all the pain she was feeling, it had to be. It tried creeping back in and she once again pushed it away. She didn't have the time for it.

"I'm not a Jedi, Crosshair, you know that."

He slightly lowered his gun. She took that opportunity to take a few slow steps towards him, putting her saber on her belt. She kept her hands out, so he could see she didn't have her weapons.

"Good soldiers follow orders, Commander." He raised the gun again and she stopped for a moment.

She was only a few feet from him, flitting between his gun and his covered face.

"Go ahead."

"What?"

"Shoot me. Complete the mission."

His finger tightened on the trigger, slightly shaking. It was like something was trying to force him to, like with the kid. He didn't know the Jedi, but he knew her. He lowered his gun, shaking his head.

"I--can't."

She finished approaching. She was too close now for him to shoot her with his rifle, but he could easily drop the rifle and use his pistol. Or grab hers.

She reached to take off his helmet, and he didn't stop her. She dropped it on the ground. He dropped his rifle, his hand hovering over his pistol.

"Don't. I don't want to kill you."

"You wouldn't."

"Why not."

"You love me."

She looked down, watching his hand. Tears were stinging her eyes now. He took a step back, pulling out his pistol and pointing it at her head. She didn't move, closing her eyes.

He was shaking, so he put his other hand on the gun to attempt to steady himself. It wasn't this hard with the kid, he hadn't even thought about it. She knew she should kill him, but she couldn't. He was right.

"I love you, Crosshair."

He dropped his arm, then fired at the ground next to her. She tensed, then realized she was still alive. He had already scooped up his helmet, and rifle by the time she looked at him.

He turned away from her, contacting the others

"I found Macawi. She's dead."

She fell to her knees, the grief from everything overwhelming her. She heard Hunter's voice through the comm, but couldn't comprehend what he said. Crosshair started walking away but glanced back at her before he put his helmet on.

"Keep running."

Her eyes snapped to him, catching one last look at him before he slipped his helmet on and walked away from her.

The tears started running, and she screamed in pain. Everything was gone. She let her emotions take over for a few minutes before she forced them down again. She needed her composure to keep moving. She willed herself in the opposite direction Crosshair had gone. She walked at first, and slowly started running. She stopped when she got to a cliff. She watched a starship go overhead, leaving the planet. She realized it was the Bad Batch's ship, her ship.

She tried contacting Obi-Wan, then Anakin, and Shaak Ti. No one was answering their private comm channels. She threw the holo-communicator over the cliff, shouting in frustration. The emotions washed over her again. Screaming and cursing she stripped off the few pieces of armor she had, throwing them off the cliff as well. She stopped when she was about to throw her pauldron over. Each member of The Bad Batch had painted their own small additions to it. She turned it over in her hands, looking at each one in turn. She held it up and placed her forehead on it.

"I'm sorry." She whispered as she dropped it, it landed in the snow.

She glanced at it for a moment before continuing, going to find a way down. Crosshair had given her a window of time, though she didn't know how long it would last. She was alone for the first time in a very long time. But if she was going to continue to survive, she needed to be alone. And she was determined to survive.