213

Chapter eight

Welcome in

Armin

Two down five to go.

One week since Sahsa's surgery, two days since her death.

Her body rejected the new liver. Her body gave up but her mind never did. She kept saying she was going to get through it but she never did. She was so happy to get that liver, she was so excited.

Connie took it the worst. The day of her death his memory seemed to get better, he knew who we were and why he was there. Which means he remembers seeing his best friend die. Hearing the flatline and the rush of doctors. Now it seems like he's welcomed his disease, he wasn't trying to remember anymore, he was trying to forget. And so was I. Hange said if he stayed in this condition that he'd probably waste away in a week or two.

"Sasha!"

"You two stop, you're scaring the new guy."

"I got a liver! I'm getting a transplant! I might actually make it out of this God forsaken hospital!"

When it happened we were all sitting on the floor of her room while she was sleeping. I was reading to everyone then I was interrupted by a series of beeps. Doctors and nurses rushed in, they shocked her heart and tried CPR but the sound of the flatline still rang. We all just had to sit and watch it happen.

-

My room is cold even though the heat is on, I can't turn it up cause I'm not allowed out of bed. I can't walk well and every now and then I stutter while trying to talk.

It's around the time Eren gets up so he should be in here soon to keep me company. I sit up in bed to make room at the end where he usually sits.

"Hey Armin, how are you feeling?" He walks in with his red blanket and a tired look.

"I h-have-" I take a breath and slow down my speech so I don't stutter and sound weird. "A headache." I finish my sentence slowly.

He sits criss cross at he end of my bed and covers himself in his blanket. "Your room is cold."

"The heat is on, we're just cold cause our bodies are failing us."

"Hello 213, I have morning meds!" Hange cheers as they walk in my room.

"213?" I question.

"106 plus 107 is 213, kinda like a ship name I guess."

I feel my face get hot and go red. Eren and I make eye contact for a split second and then we quickly look away from eachother.

"Awe look how cute you two are! Now take your meds please." They hand us the cups of water and our pills, after we've taken them we hand the empty cups back. "Oh Armin before Erwin left he took a look at the last pictures we took of you tumor and he said he might be able to remove it! Now it's not a definite fix and it could possibly mess your brain up even more but it's still a chance."

I think over Hange's words for a bit. Get the surgery BUT there's chance my brain will get even more messed up or I could even die on the table. But the tumor could also get removed and then I'll be healthy again, but then I'd have to watch all my friends die and live with that pain.

"Armin did you hear them?" Eren shakes me out of my thoughts. I look up at Hange and shake me head.

"I'm not going to get the surgery."

"What?!" Eren yells. "You have to Armin this is your only chance!"

"Oh yeah, this is my only chance to live a shit life with a bunch of dead friends! That sounds lovely doesn't it?!"

"So you're just gonna let yourself die?"

"That's what I've been doing for over a month Eren, I'll be fine." Hange slowly backs out of the room and shuts the door behind themself.

"That's so selfish, what about your family?" He asks. Funny thing is is that their dead too. Mom and Dad died in a car accident when I was seven and Grandpa passed last year.

"They're dead too Eren that's my point. You're all gonna die and then I'll be alone. OR I'll die on the table and shorten my life even more, there is no good side to this."

"What if I get a heart and you survive this surgery? Then we can- Nevermind."

I knew what was he going to say, my brain may be failing but I'm not dumb. The thing is the second he says it I know I'll start hoping that we'll both live and start dating and move in together and get a pet and adopt kids and live till we're old and die of natural causes. So I won't let him say it.

"Just think about it Armin that's all I'm asking."

Hange

The first argument a couple has usually isn't about them dying but everyone lives their lives out differently I guess. It is cute that Eren's worried about Armin, now all he needs is to buck up and ask him out.

I remember when I asked out my now husband Moblit I just marched up to him and told him we were gonna go out to dinner. Surprisingly he said said yes. But I understand that not everyone can be this outgoing.

"Hey Hange here's Ymir's charts, she's not doing well."

"Thank you Hitch, I am aware of her condition. Although maybe if you did your job she wouldn't be like this, just a thought." I take the charts from her and then walk behind the desk to the computer.

"Hange every patient on this floor is going to die and you know that." Hitch snickers.

"Yeah I know that and our job is to lengthen their lives as much as possible and make them comfortable, not let them die!" I don't hate many people and I can usually push past people's flaws but Hitch just pisses me off. "So yes Hitch I'm going to keep making the patients feel loved and cared for and you can either get on board or shut the hell up! Now you go in there and you tell Ymir and Historia that Ymir is going to be just fine, I don't care if it's a lie as long as it gives those two some relief even just for a second."

She glares at me then sharply turns and walks away towards Ymir's room.

A/n I didn't want to go into too much detail about Sasha's death because I can't do that again.