To Be Alive And Desired

Chapter 5: No More Remorse

Elise and Nelson wake up around the same time, and right now both turn their heads to look at one another. They look into each other's eyes. Nelson looks at his wife, wondering what he could do to make her love him again like she used to. Elise looks at her husband, feeling bad that she no longer desires him like she used to. She knows deep down that she wishes Holden was the man in bed with her.

Nelson: I'm gonna get up.

Nelson gets out of bed.

Nelson: I'll make breakfast for everyone. How do you want your eggs?

Elise: Sunnyside up.

Nelson gets up, takes a few steps towards the door, and turns back to Elise. He looks right into her eyes as she sits up.

Nelson: You think I don't know?

She freezes. No words come out of her mouth. Elise feels that Nelson knows, but she doesn't know what to say to make him think otherwise. She feels that anything she says will only make matters worse. Nelson shakes his head and walks away.

Elise: Shit.

Elise puts on her glasses, grabs her phone, and even though she feels bad for Nelson, she still messages with Holden. He says "Let's get a room tonight." and she doesn't know what to say. She knows she wants him, but doesn't know if this affair should go any further. Elise joins her family for breakfast. Unlike most meals the Campbell family has together, Nelson is very quiet.

Trinity: So, what are everyone's plans for today?

Minnie: I don't know? Play "Roblox".

Elise: Enjoy the day with my family.

She looks across the table at Nelson.

Elise: How about you, hon?

Nelson: Who knows?

After breakfast, Elise continues messaging Holden.

"I can't meet tonight" she replies.

"Then tomorrow." he responds.

"I work"

"Take off."

"You know I have a family. It's not that easy for me"

"They will think you're at work. You take off and meet me so we can fuck like we've wanted to do since we first saw each other."

Elise knows she wants to. She gets butterflies in her stomach just thinking about it.

Holden messages Elise saying "You know you want to. Don't deny it."

Elise responds "I won't"

"Say you'll meet up with me"

"I will"

"Tomorrow"

Elise thinks for a few moments as she looks at a picture on the wall of her with Nelson and their daughters. Even though she doesn't want to hurt them and knows this could lead to everyone being hurt, it's as if she can't stop herself. Elise replies "Yes. I'm supposed to work 5-11". As the two make plans to meet, Elise says she will only meet him outside of town, so they agree on a motel twenty minutes from her house.

When Nelson helps Elise fold the sheets, she stares at him with sadness. For there was a time when he was truly the only man she desired. Now, she desires another. Elise knows if Holden had done to her what Nelson did last night, she would have been extremely turned on. In her eyes, Nelson has been a good husband and father. He's the type of man women say they want. Yet here is Elise, setting up a time and place to take her affair to another level. But in her eyes it's so much more than an affair. What it is she does not know just yet. Nevertheless, she plans to find out. There is a lot she plans to find out when it comes to Holden Bennet.