Muse [h.s.]

36. cosmic

i always include songs, and you never have to listen to them at all to enjoy the chapter but, i highly recommend you listening to the song attached while reading this chapter specifically...here we go!

🎵Cosmic Love — Florence + The Machine

Ella's POV

"Harry, you idiot!" I hear Lydia shout before she slams the door shut.

Harry?

My heart races with just the mere mention of his name and I shoot up from where I'm sat beside Jax, craning my neck towards the hallway as Lydia storms back into the living room.

He was here; he was just here because Lydia called for him...so where did he go?

Why did he leave?

"What's going on?" Jax asks, concern in his tone. My heart is pounding as I stand in my spot, looking at my best friend for answers.

Lydia paces back and forth in the suite's living room, tugging at her hair as she groans. "He's a fucking idiot! He's such an idiot!"

"Lydia, can you please tell me what's going on?" I nearly shout. I feel bad, but I can feel the frustration surge through my body as I look at Lydia and her incessant pacing; it wasn't helping.

She suddenly stops, shaking her head as she finally looks at me. "He's the biggest idiot I've ever met. He heard the conversation you guys were just having, I'm guessing. "

He heard the conversation?

Oh my god.

It suddenly dawns upon me; he heard me say that I'm in love with him. He knows that I'm in love with him, he knows that I love him.

"Only he only heard a bit of it, the idiot!" Lydia adds, causing me to narrow my brows.

"What? What do you mean?" I ask, feeling the lump that's settled in the middle of my throat. My mind is racing just as fast as the beat of my heart, almost like I can't quite keep up with Lydia's words.

Lydia rolls her eyes, tucking a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear. "He ran off, Ella. He thinks you don't love him or care for him, he said you deserve more than being a part of his 'crazy world,' whatever the fuck that means."

"Idiot, idiot, idiot!" Lydia continues on as I mull over her words. Jax gets up to pull her to the side, quietly speaking to her.

"Ella's only just started to feel better, calm down, please? Don't stress her anymore," he says to Lydia quietly, but I'm too wrapped in my own head to say anything.

Part of his crazy world?

What the hell was Harry going on about?

He thinks you don't love him or care for him, Lydia had said.

He only heard a bit of the conversation...the puzzle pieces begin to click in my head. He didn't hear the ending part of the conversation; he heard us talking about the tabloid and assumed.

He assumed that when I said it didn't change anything, it meant that it didn't change how I felt. How he thinks I feel.

I'm wrong; he doesn't know that I love him at all. He couldn't be more oblivious.

And now he's run off to God knows where, thinking that I don't want to be part of his 'crazy world,' as he put it.

You fucker, I've been a part of your world, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.