A Court of Shadow and Song

Chapter 1

Azriel POV

It took everything Azriel had to bring himself to the House of Wind. He was fighting darkness that his shadows couldn't even understand. But today wasn't about him. Today was about his brother. Today Cassian and Nesta would partake in a mating ceremony fit for royalty and his second brother would be a mated male. And I will be alone, Azriel thought with a sigh.

He was happy for his brother, for both of his brothers. But their mating only reminded him that he would never have one. He knew in his heart that he didn't deserve one and that was no one's fault but his own. He had done terrible things in his long life and he had enjoyed much of it. The Mother would be cruel to trap anyone in a life with him. With his traumas and his darkness. He knew that if, for some reason, he were ever to meet his mate, he would reject the bond in order to protect her. Whoever she may be. He wouldn't allow anyone to be tied to him, no matter how much pain it caused him.

Azriel had arrived at the house early. He took his suit to his room and headed for the training ring, hoping to burn off some of his frustration before the ceremony. He only wanted to feel joy for his brother tonight.

Azriel cursed as he stepped into the ring, noting that it was far from empty and his shadows had not warned him. Standing in the center of the ring, sword in hand, was Gwyn. Azriel remained quiet, watching her form as she sliced through the air. It was flawless now, of course. But he expected nothing less from the self made Valkyrie. He had never met someone as strong and determined as the little Nymph Priestess and he found himself constantly in awe of all she had overcome.

Azriel cursed again when Gwyn shifted and dropped the sword, startled by his presence. "My apologies." Azriel said quietly, walking slowly to pick up the fallen weapon. "I didn't mean to startle you."

"I don't imagine you would be much of a spymaster if I had heard you come in." Gwyn chuckled, taking the sword back from the shadowsinger. Azriel smiled politely, noting how Gwyn no longer flinched at the presence of a male, let alone the close proximity they were in now. She had overcome at least some of her fears. She was a warrior and Azriel couldn't help but think again of how awestruck he was by that strength.

Gwyn cleared her throat and Azriel realized he should have said something. He opened his mouth to speak but found no words there. Gwyn sensed his unease and gave him a small smile. "Did you want to use the ring? I can leave." Azriel did not want to force her out and was shaking his head before she could finish.

"Don't leave on my account," he replied, "I only wanted to get some energy out before the ceremony." Gwyn nodded and he realized that was what she was doing as well.

"I understand." She sighed, "I came to work out some of my nerves." Azriel smiled softly at the Valkyrie now. Until the Blood Rite, she had not left the library within the House of Wind in two years. Since he brought her here, Azriel remembered. Now she ventured out occasionally to low populated areas and always with Nesta or Emerie, her Valkyrie sisters. But this ceremony would definitely be the biggest event she had attended in years.

Azriel watched her hand brush over her neck, nervously taking hold of the little flower necklace she now constantly wore. The necklace he gave her the night her presence kept him from spiraling. Azriel picked up a dulled blade, holding it up for her to see, "Let 's practice then."