Undeniable (Feitan x Reader)

Chapter 35: Please Forgive My Stupid Friend

As one usually does when their life has been marred by violence and unspeakable tragedies, there are few nights of peaceful sleep. Time does not dull the horrific and dark nightmares that haunt one who has led such a life.

Feitan was no exception. Insomnia was his most loyal although unwanted companion, having plagued him for the past 28 years of his life. He preferred to spend his evenings taking in the beauty of the nightly cityscape, no matter where he was. He would find his way up to the roof of whatever high and unsecured building and spend hours watching the artificial lights go on for miles.

He had done this since he ever had left Meteor City, as there was nothing to look at but dust where he came from.

The truth was that he enjoyed how similar most cities looked in the dead of the night, and how it seemed almost eternal. He enjoyed being as he always was; just a solitary, dark figure shrouded in mystery.

It was the little bit of power he allowed himself to feel, the fear that crept into his victim's eyes whenever he dared glance their way. He commanded respect and fear even amongst the members of the infamous Phantom Troupe. Everyone knew, despite his small stature and quiet manner.

"Alone, again." He whispered to himself. "It's how it's supposed to be" He felt the night air cut through him, a chilly reminder of his solitude. As much as he tried to think of nothing, his mind drifted to the image of you lying on his bed, the fire in your eyes that he craved so deeply.

He cursed something in his native tongue under his breath.

It had been nearly 8 days since you last showed up to work. Your phone remained shut off, dishes piling up in the sink, laundry sitting idly waiting to be done. The last few days you spent lying in bed, staring meaninglessly at the ceiling, as if it would resolve any of the complicated emotions you were feeling.

You knew as the doorbell rang consistently for days on end that there was a whole world out there that you had separated yourself from, and you couldn't hide from it much longer.

The most painful of all the memories you tried to avoid were the only ones that brought you comfort. The comfort of Feitan's scent, the softness of his touch, the way your heart skipped a beat whenever he called your name. "No..." you began to cry "Feitan you IDIOT" Your arms sought solace in the pile of pillows you clung to so desperately. Burying your head in the nest you built, you screamed so hard your voice cracked.

And then you found yourself in a fit of rage. Pure anger personified, rampaging through your room as you threw whatever objects had the misfortune of being in your way. You had never been the type to have difficulty managing your anger, if anything you always had trouble staying angry long enough for any grudges or feelings of vengeance to linger.

It was a sad sight; you were completely unraveled and had lost every ounce of control you had left. You could no longer hear your own wails, as your eyes could only feel ringing. And you lay there for hours, staring at nothing, thinking of nothing but your own grief and despair.

You absolutely hated yourself for letting him ruin you. If only you had left him alone, if only you had just walked away. You had so many chances to part ways with him before becoming too involved. Deep down inside, you knew that this wouldn't end well. Everyone knew this at heart. But you didn't care. Stupid, stupid girl. You thought to yourself. I even sound like him now.

After 3 hours of what seemed like an eternity of sulking and grieving, you finally mustered enough strength to stand up. Making your way to your nightstand, you rummaged through the drawers until your phone materialized somewhere within the mess. You waited patiently as it charged enough for it to turn on, the logo of the cell phone glaring brightly into your eyes.