Guardian angel ( A.I )

Surprise

( not edited )
" What.?" I question my father in a low whisper.
" Your mother left. she's not coming back."
That broke my heart into pieces. she's gone. she's not coming back and it's all my fault. why did I have to be such a fucked up child? Her words play over in my head from years ago.
~
" you selfish dumb little bitch. You were a mistake child. if I could see the future I would have made sure you were never born. You are fucking useless. I can't wait to see the sucker that had to put up with all your shit in the future."
~
"Sweet heart there's something else I have to tell you. Does the name Jennifer mean anything to you?" I shake my head no and he shows me a picture of her. I feel like I should know her. I feel like I've seen her before.
" This is your sister. she died when you two were 4. you were playing in the lake in the forest behind the skate park on a little raft we bought you. you were playing, jumping around and she fell over. she drowned because she couldn't swim. since then your mother has been broken and she blames you for it."
Every word cut my like a knife. I had a sister. I had a fucking sister and he never told me. he knew why my mother hated me and he never said a fucking word.
" You knew?..." I trailed of in a low whisper
"You fucking knew why she hated me and didn't say anything?! You fucking knew what she was doing to me, you could have told her to stop that it wasn't my fault but no you decided to be the little bitch you are and stay shut! You didnt fucking care what she was doing to me, you didn't care that since the fucking 6th grade I've been wanting to kill my self. you wouldn't fucking care if I killed my self right now would you?! No you wouldn't because I'm just the fucked up kid you two never wanted! I'm fucking done!" The tears threaten to fall but the fire in my eyes burn them out. I grab my bag run up to my room take it from under my bed and stick in behind my pants and storm out my house. I ran to the only place that could help me think. I ran to the skate park and ran to the forest behind it. I ran and ran until I reached the lake. I stared out into the water and let the tears fall from my eyes. this is the place where everything changed.
" Jennifer. If you can hear me right now I want you to know that im so sorry. This is all my fault. I'm sorry..." I sob into nothing. I killed my sister. she's dead and it's all my fault. I sat in silence for about 2 hours crying. then it hit me.
" I'll do you a favor and join you in the afterlife."
I peel off my phone case and pull out my best friend.
" You deserve this you little bitch. You fucking killed your own sister. You were just an accident waiting to happen." I can hear the monsters screaming in my head. They're right. I do deserve this. I deserve to die. I start to think of the people that might actually A fuck
Luke: he has maria he will get over it
Maria: she will cry then forget about it after a while.
Dad: he dosent want me
Mom: she already hates me.
Ash Mike & cal: they haven't known me long enough to care.
With every name I say causes another cut along my wrist. The blood and cuts aren't enough but I'm tired of suffering so I pull my gun from the back of my pants, take out the clip and place one bullet in the gun.
The tears threaten to fall down my face when I place the gun to the side of my head. this was it. I'll finally get what I want. Then my phone rings. its maria.
" Don't pick it up. don't pick it it." I continuously say to my self. I have to Shes my best friend. She means a lot to me. I can't leave her without saying good bye. So I pick up the phone.
" Hey Maria." I try to say trying not to sound like I'm crying
" What's wrong? I can hear you crying."
Shit I don't want to tell her but she has the right to know.
" Maria I'm sorry I love you. Tell Luke I love him too. oh and tell the boys I'm sorry."
" What are you talking about? Alyssa you are scaring me." she sounds like she's running. she sounds out of breath. I pull back the hammer until I hear it click.
" ALYSSA DONT!" I can hear her scream. she was so loud I couldn't tell if it was the phone or if she was right behind me.
" I'm sorry..." I whisper one last time then...
BANG!
-
MARIA POV.
" Wow babe I didn't know you could play the drums"
" Me either." says Luke.
He's so adorable. like a big skinny but comfy teddy bear i just wanna hug and kiss all day. I watch him while he teaches ashton to play the guitar.
After a long practice the boys finally say there good byes and we get into the car.
" Baby I really don't want to watch that movie now. can we do something else?" I question luke with the best puppy dog eyes I could. He just looks at me and gives me a warm smile.
" Anything for you baby." he kisses my forehead and starts to drive.
" Where do you want to go princess?"
" I actually want to go swimming so can we go back to my house and go get my bathing suit?" He smirks at me with that face. He dosent say anything and just takes me to.My house. I change into my bathing suit get into the car and we drive to the lake.
It was a silent drive to the forest. When we got to the forest I could hear someone's voice but couldn't tell what they were saying.
Who was that? I look around and see a familiar head of brown curly hair far away. She's sitting down. Alyssa? What is she doing here all by her self? She talks some more as I silently walk closer trying to sneak up on her.
" Shhh. She's gonna hear you." I say to luke. I swear I could never rob a bank with this loser. he's too loud.
She stands up and wipes her face. then she lifts up her shirt in the back and reveals a gun. Surprise!! Did not expect her to pull out one of those.
"What the fuck is she doing?" I loudly whisper to luke. he looks at me with compleat horror on his face and freezes. Whats wrong with him? I decide to leave him behind and keep walking. she then places the gun to her head.
My heart is beating fast, I'm hyperventilating. I don't want to scare her because she might rush into it but I have to do something. I instantly pull out my phone and dial her quickly. I look at her and pray she picks up the phone. when she finally picks up the phone I let out a sigh of relief. I play it cool and act like I can't see her to see if my voice will make her change her mind. She says hi and I can hear her trying to hold back her tears.
" What's wrong? I can hear you crying."
"Maria I'm sorry I love you. Tell Luke I love him too. oh and tell the boys I'm sorry."
" What are you talking about? Alyssa you are scaring me." I start to run towards her.i can see her pull back the hammer and I scream.
" ALYSSA DONT!"
I can hear her whisper an ' I'm sorry ' as she places the gun beside her head. I run up to her and attempted to move the gun away from her head before she could pull the trigger .
BANG! The sound of the gun shot ricocheted throughout the entire forest. after that I hear nothing. I keep my eyes closed not wanting to know what happened. I keep my hand gripped tight on the gun. I turn around to see her just standing there. Head down un responsive and silently crying. why? Why would she want to do this? I can see the blood drip down from her arm. No. please tell me she hasnt.
" Alyssa what's wrong? How the hell could you do that to me?! What were you thinking?! Why did you cut your self?! Does anybody know about this?" I scream in her face. she was really going to leave me. I couldn't let her leave, she means too much to me. she looks up at luke, who finally made his way over here.
" you told him?"
Now I'm pist
" You fucking told him but not me?! Alyssa I've known you longer then he has and you told him before me?!"
It was true I've known her since freshmen year and he met her in junior. did she not fucking trust me? I was angry but hurt at the same time. my best friend dosent trust me enough to tell me she's cutting.
She still says nothing. Shes unresponsive. I sigh wipe the small tears from my face and me and luke guide her to the car. we take her to my house clean her up, and tend to her cuts.
" Alyssa why did you do this to yourself?" I softly question her.
She just sits there not saying a word. I'm going to fucking kill whoever led her on to this. i give luke a concerned look and he just looked down and cried. I wanted to burst into tears but I had to stay strong for her.
" God damit alyssa answer me!" I scream and slam my fist on the floor.
" Babe don't yell at her it's just going to make it worse."
" What do you want me to do? Sit here and watch her try to kill herself?"
Before he had the chance to say anything I stormed out running upstairs not wanting to hear another word. my best friend was hurting her self and I wanted to know why.
ALYSSA POV
I watched her walk right out of the door. there she went my best friend. She hates mr now because she knows the truth. this is why I kept it from her. I knew that I would lose her and that's the last thing I wanted.
" You could come stay at my house tonight if you want." luke says to me. I just nod my head yes and we walk to the car. On my way out the house I could hear maria screaming up stairs and the tears began to collect in my eyes. we got into the car luke gave me a hurt look then started the car. the air was so thick you could cut it with a knife like cake. ( XD cake for days)
We drove to my house so I could get some clothes. my father was out so I just quickly grabbed my clothes and left. When we got to Luke's house I went upstairs took a shower and walked into his room all in silence. he was laying in his bed with red, puffy eyes.
He's been crying, and it's all because of me. Like everything else it's my fault that the people I care about are hurting. I don't say anything. instead I just climb into bed , lay next to him and just cry into his chest. He just puts his hand on my head and strokes my hair.
" It's okay alyssa. everything is going to be okay." he whispers and kisses my forehead.
I can hear him sniff and it just makes my cry even more. I fucking hate life. If I tell the truth I lose people but if I lie I lose people. this is just one fucking battle that I'm bound to lose. Ashton texts me but I'm just not in the mood for anyone else right now
( only maria would understand what I mean XD)
I decide to look at his text.
ASHTON😒: hey I have a surprise for you.
ME: what is it?
ASHTON😒: you are gonna have to wait for it.
ME: but I wanna know now :(
ASHTON😒: you will soon. not get some sleep. good night xoxo
I text him back good night then throw my phone on the floor. I look at luke and the tears start to build up again.
I cry for another 10 minutes until I finally cry my self to sleep. To a sleep I never want to wake up from.
**
Hey guys. this is sort of a depressing chapter and for that I'm so sorry but it had to be done. holy Christ nuggets. I almost had a heart attack just writing this chapter. what did you guys think? Let me know if I need to improve in anyway and I'll be sure to do that ASAP.
Okay so the picture is really my arm. The song I thought made sense in this chapter since I was near death ^o^ anyway hope you guys like it.
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Love ~ alyssa