Lover's Fantasia

Cruel Summer

no rules in breakable heaven 

June 28th, 2021

Amsterdam

It was a fresh start. And it was exactly what Gigi needed after finally starting to feel like herself, finally seeing the sun without her smile. It was a new city bustling with new people and new experiences. It was perfect timing too. Soon after Biden was sworn into office, vaccines were being rolled out. By spring Gigi was fully vaccinated, she could finally go out with her friends and feel the sun beating down on her skin. Her best friend had just won Drag Race, and in late May they celebrated with a trip to Mexico. Gigi was performing again, living again. She breathed in the fresh air that was once masked with a piece of cloth. Everything was finally going back to normal.

Well, almost everything.

Because some days Gigi still went to Venice Beach to sit alone for a moment, allowing herself to bask in the almost nostalgic feeling. Allowing herself to feel that ache in her chest she had fought so hard to push down the past year. But she knew that feeling wouldn't last, so she'd leave, telling herself it was for the best. Then the sun blinded Gigi through her curtains early one morning when she got a call from Jaida Essence Hall and Michelle Visage offering her a gig for the summer in Amsterdam. And Gigi couldn't help but hope. It was Hunter who ultimately convinced her to go.

"It'll be good for you," he said. "It's new. It's nothing she's... touched." And Hunter was right, so that night they booked a ticket to Amsterdam. Gigi was excited, she really was. What could be better than spending nearly three months with Jaida and Michelle while they prepared for the iconic Amsterdam Pride? It was the perfect opportunity.

So why did Gigi's chest ache as she made her way through customs? She decided to ignore it, which was something she had gotten used to doing. The Schiphol airport was much different than LAX. It didn't have the same white interior and harsh lights that always caught Gigi in her worst moments, no, this airport was different. It was modern, but not artificial. With plenty of art, places to sit, and excitement. It was enough to make her nerves settle.

Gigi's eyes scanned the horizon through the large windows, and if she squinted she swore she could see Amsterdam, her home for the next few months. She saw The Man in the Clock and quickly took a picture, captioning it "surprise!" before sending it to her story. She decided to keep Amsterdam a secret from the fans, mostly because she couldn't promise that when the day came, she would be able to get on the plane.

"Don't be dumb," Symone said to Gigi as they walked into the airport, Hunter trailing behind. "This is a good thing, Gigi, you're gonna realize it as soon as that plane takes off."

So Gigi boarded the plane, not wanting the last time she saw Symone for a while to end in a fight. And she made it to Amsterdam, but now she wasn't exactly sure what to do from here. She decided going to baggage claim would probably be a good start.

As Gigi walked to the baggage claim, she decided that Symone was right, and this really was the best thing for her. It had to be. She stood waiting for her suitcase when a flash of color caught her eye. Her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach, hoping her eyes were just playing tricks on her. It wouldn't be the first time. Sometimes she'd see a head of curls on the street and her heart would skip a beat, and the sensible part of Gigi's mind would remind her that they were worlds away.

Gigi assumed it was just her wishful thinking and continued to look for her suitcase and waited for the tightness in her chest to go away. But then the flash of color Gigi had seen came into full view. A hot pink suitcase covered in various stickers with a leopard print scarf tied around the handle. Suddenly her heart shot up from the bottom of her stomach into her throat. Gigi blinked a few times, trying to wake herself up from this nightmare. 'It couldn't be,' Gigi thought. 'There's no fucking way.'