Pansy: A Chandlmara & Mcnamawyer Fanfiction (Heathers The Musical)

Chapter Eight: The One I Choose

The sleepover with Martha and Veronica was such a relief from the past few weeks of... everything. The rally was cut short indefinitely by the remains of an unidentified person who... blew themselves up in front of our school were found. Probably some morbid prankster who wanted to terrorize students who have been through enough already with yet another suicide. Hopefully, that ends all the death that's been going on with a bang. And to think Veronica got caught in that. The person should be identified in no time, I guess. Such a bizarre thing to happen! Because of this, we have yet another long weekend. At this rate, we'll have to make up days till mid-June.

After the Heathers disbanding, hanging out with people who weren't Heathers for that amount of time felt... very refreshing. No discussions on who's life we're going to tear up. No lunch time polls. No nastiness. Just talking about whatever important on mundane thing we wanted, eating every one of the millions of snacks Veronica's mom gave us, and feeling brave enough to cuddle on the couch with both of them—with Ronnie, Jesus Christ—as we watch a princess and a disguised farm-boy roll down a hill and kiss in the grass. It reminded me a bit of what it was like to hang out with Heather when we were little, before we met Heather, but even then, Veronica, Martha, and I didn't get drunk under the bleachers. I can't believe I had a hand in taking Veronica away from this life. In my mind she won the lottery.

Martha and I had long retired for the night at Ronnie's when a light creek sound on repeat woke me up. I sit up and look around. I'm directly next to Veronica's bed, so I stood to see beyond it. I found her sitting at her bay window, continuously opening and closing one of the shutters.

"You woke up?" I whispered, walking as softly as I could to her so I didn't wake up Martha.

"Never slept," Veronica corrected softly.

"What's in your head?" I implore, sitting next to her.

She's still for a moment. "Nothing much..."

"Are you sure?"

Her heel tapped on the ground rapidly. "I'm... positive that it was Jason who... died in front of the school earlier."

"You did get caught in it, you say... so I guess you saw..." I rub her shoulder. I guess I didn't see JD leave the pep rally. "If that's true I'm really sorry..."

"I know I said I wanted guys like him out of my life—and honestly that's still true, but I did not want him dead." Veronica gave me a tired smile I could only see by the moonlight. "These weeks have been so difficult. More's happened than I can explain. I think I'm just letting it hit me now..." She huffed. "I feel drained."

"Would..." I trail. "Would crying help you?"

Veronica hugged her knees, her hand fidgeting a little. "I don't know..."

"You could try..."

Her eye twitched. "...Now?"

"No... whenever you need—but if you need now—"

Veronica cuddled into the crook of my neck. My train of thought came to a halt for seconds on end. I snap myself out of it. I can only imagine her relationship with JD. He might have actually been terrible. Not just annoying or clingy. I idly brush her side, up and down, from her shoulder to her elbow.

"I'm really glad you're here with us, Heather."

"You are?"

Ronnie nodded. "You're the only Heather I ever liked by the end of it all. I don't even see you as a Heather anymore. Just... someone I like with a past."

I huff. "Okay..." I glare into the near pitch-black void of the room. "Ronnie? Could anything ruin our friendship?" 

"I mean... if you killed someone..."