34 - prepare for farewells

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I kept telling myself that we still had a month together. Plenty of time.

Yet here we were. A month later. Time just flew past us, and now I was stood here helping him pack whilst Aria played in the backyard with Hudson.

"It's going to be weird not sleeping in this bed with you for a while.." he said, making a lump form in my throat. But he's had many moments in the past month when he told me he'd call it off.

The day after we spoke in Italy. When Aria and I moved in. When Aria chased Hudson around the house for cussing.

And every time, I had to show him why he was doing it. How we'd be ok. I had to be the strong one until he leaves. Because if he sees me sad, he won't go.

"And now you'll be sleeping on a tour bus with Mitch who snores. Living the life of luxury!" I joke, making him laugh slightly as he zips up his suitcase.

"All packed up then.." he sighs out, placing the bag on the ground. "Fuck.." he huffs out, walking away from me and shutting the door to the bathroom.

I heard the shower water start running, him getting in as the facade I had up quickly crumbled down. My hand clamped over my mouth as I let silent tears fall down my face. He'd be playing the opening night at Dallas tonight. Then that's it. He'd be gone.

I sat on the edge of our bed, my head in my hands as I let the tears fall if held onto for a month now. A pair of strong arms grabbed me, pulling me into their chest which snapped me from my thoughts. I didn't hear him come in.

But I didn't care at this point.

I just sobbed, gripping tightly on his shirt as his hands traced small circles on my back. "Shhh..it's okay.." Trent whispered, letting me cry it out.

"Im going to miss you..so fucking much.." I say quietly between sobs. Looks like it was his turn to be the strong one, placing kisses on top of my head.

"I'll miss you too, Gee. But I'll call you all the time. You'll probably talk to me more when I'm gone than you do when I'm here." He chuckled out, making my crying slow slightly.

"We'll make this work. And then I'll be back in a few months and I won't leave your side. I promise you." He whispers, fingers running through my hair as I wipe the tears from my face.

"I know. You need to get ready anyway, we have to get to the stadium soon." I smile sadly at him. "Ok." He kisses me before going back to getting ready.

I headed over to the mirror, deciding to put barely anything makeup on. I doubt it'll be the last time I cry today.

I pull on a pair of ripped denim shorts, a dark grey band T-shirt. I slip my black jacket on, and a pair of black knee high heeled boots.

By the time I'm dressed and ready to go, everyone is gathered near the front door. Everyone but Aria and Trent.

"Where are they?" I ask Hudson and he gestures to the window. Sat on the steps by the front door, Trent had Aria on his lap. "Saying his goodbyes." Hudson said.

I watched as Trent wiped some tears from Aria's face before saying something that obviously amused her as her little giggle could be heard from inside.

"How are you feeling?" Grace asked me, rubbing my back as I watched them, forcing my tears back down. "I just..I can't talk about it." I whisper, my voice cracking. "Let's just go. I don't want to keep hanging around here. I need a distraction, and it's always busy before the show." I blurt out, opening the door as Trent and Aria looked at me.

I flash them a smile as I head straight over to the car, getting in the passenger seat. Ellie grabbed Aria, walking towards the car as Trent seemed to ask Grace something. She just shrugged sadly, both of them looking in my direction.

One by one, everyone piled into the car until Trent roared out of the driveway. The only thing breaking the silence in the car is Hudson and Aria singing Disney songs in the backseat.

We pulled into the back entrance, everyone shuffled out of the car but Trent stops me before I can. The two of us alone in the car as everyone heads inside.

"I don't want our last day together for a while to be like this." He says and I sigh. He's right. I've just been pushing him away because I thought it'd be easier for me. But it's only hurting him more.

"I'm sorry..I just..I guess I understand now why you left the way you did all those years ago. Because a goodbye seems impossible to do with you." I confess, gripping his hand. "Come on. You've got a show to smash." I smile over at him.

The both of us get out the car, walking through the stadium together, his arms never leaving from around my waist.

We head straight for the stage, my jaw dropping slightly as I look out at the size of it. "This place is huge!" I smile, his grip tightening around me as we stood, taking it all in.

"You know, I've never been to Arizona. Might have to come by soon. Maybe go see a concert." I joke, making the two of us laugh as footsteps echo as they approach us.

"Time to-" Andrew starts but Trent interrupts. "Yeah I know.." he sighs out, kissing my neck quickly before we pull out of the embrace. "Sound check, then show prep." He tells me as the stage starts filling up with the guys as they pick up their instruments.

"Hey, cracker." Mitch chuckles, sitting by his drums. He's been calling me cracker since Italy. I reminded him of a firecracker apparently. "Hey Mitch. Screwed any more of my friends?" I smirk at him as everyone laughs. "Nope. But that doesn't mean I haven't slept with any of your friends recently." He jokes back. Him and Ellie often find themselves spending some nights together since Italy.

"You can hang around for this if you want." Trent says as I hop off the front of the stage, sitting on one of the front row seats as they do their sound check.

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