Outsiders Imagines And Preferences 🐴😎🍰🏈🥤🍺🚗🌅

Help! (Reader X Sodapop)

⚠️ Attempts of Suicide⚠️

I looked at myself in the mirror in disgust. Im hideous.
No one loves me. Why would someone love me.

I lifted my shirt up and looked at my stomach. I'm nothing but fat. I don't deserve to eat.
I don't deserve to live. I looked at my wrists seeing all of the scars I have given myself from the past couple of months. I should just end it all.

I opened the bathroom door and looked around to see if I was alone. Luckily I was.

I went into the living room looking for one of the gangs switchblades. I grabbed it and walked to the bathroom.

I placed it down nicely and left to grab a paper and pen.
I sat on the cold bathroom floor and Started to write.

Dear Gang,

Now look, I know what your thinking.
Why would I do this?
But it was because. I deserved it. I don't deserve you guys, I don't deserve to live, I deserve nothing but pain.
And now here I am.
I'll miss you guys.

Sincerely,
          Y/N

I folded the paper and placed it nicely on the sink.
I looked at myself in the mirror. My eyes were broke.

I remember how my eyes used to light up with hope. Now I looked dead.

I grabbed the switchblade and flicked it open looking at my reflection.

"Here goes nothing." I mumbled.
The cold metal slowly slit my wrist.

Making the pain feel abit more addicting.

I did a deeper cut this time and again, and again.

I yelped in pain. Tears streaming down my face.

I place the blade down and stared at the blood that was dripping onto the floor.

"I deserve this." I whispered to myself.

I heard the door swing open followed by hollers and yells. The gang was back.

"Y/N! We're back!" I heard Soda walking to the bathroom. His eyes widened.

I couldn't help but laugh.

"What The hell Y/N! Why did you do this!" He yelled with tears in his eyes.

"I deserve it." I slurred

The Gang was now there.

I felt dizzy, my knees buckled causing me to fall to the floor.

"We gotta take her to the hospital." Darry said

"I'm..." I felt to weak to talk.

My eyes were getting heavy, The darkness over taking me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I woke up to the sound of beeping. I opened my eyes to see Sodapop looking heart broken.

"Hey Y/N, How ya feeling?" He said softly

I groaned.

"You should've let me die."

"No, don't say that. Never say that."

"Why?"

"Because you don't deserve that kind of pain. Why? Y/N? Why did you do it?" Soda seemed to nearly cry again.

I sat up and sighed.

"I deserved it." I said coldly "I'm useless to this world, I'm ugly, I'm fat. I don't deserve love, I don't deserve affection. I deserve to be hit in the head by tons of bricks."

Sodapop sighed and grabbed my hand.

I looked down but he lifted my head with his finger so I could look at him directly to his eyes.

"Y/N, I don't know who's telling you these things. But it's not true. It'll never be true; Your beautiful. Your perfect just the way you are.
Don't kill yourself. Because it's like not having the sun. Without the sun, we can't see and cant be reminded of the good things in life. And to me Y/N, your my sun. Your the reason why I believe I good people and good things. You may not know it but. You are way more special to the world than you think you are.
You should know that.
Your beautiful, Your kind, You have a great sense of humor.
I don't know what I'd do without you Y/N." Tears were streaming down his face.

"Please, Stay with me. Stop hurting yourself. You don't deserve pain. You deserve love, And you have that love. Me, The Gang, Your Family, Your Firends. We all love you. We care about you. Your the sun to out flowers. Without you we'd be dead. Without you we wouldn't be able to go along with our lives.
Y/N, Your My Sun. And You are the most greatest human being ever to step on this earth....
I love you Y/N. Please Don't kill yourself. Don't!" He started to sob.

I didn't realize it. But I was Sobbing too.

No one ever said that to me.
I then had realized he was right. I shouldn't hurt myself anymore. I realized how I help others, how I care for others, how I make people laugh, how I do good.

I shouldn't harm myself. If I do, I'm also harming the ones I love.

"I love you to Sodapop." I gave a weak smile. "I promise I will never leave you."

*Thank you loveyou3000_liv for giving me this idea and Stay Gold*

Stay Gold💛🌅

And I'm sorry but I have to add some Star Trek into this

🖖 Live long and Prosper 🖖