𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 [ 𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐚𝐮 ]

pretending .09

"come on, nini, just think about it a little more," zack complained as the two of them sat in the studio. nini let out a sigh and rolled her eyes, "what do you have to lose?"

"my self worth?" nini bluntly said as she eyed her producer. the girl got up from her seat and headed towards the coffee machine, "besides what if ricky doesn't wanna collaborate either?" 

"you told me that you guys talked the other day and that he seemed better," zack pointed out. nini inserted another coffee pod into the nespresso machine as zack continued, "so if everything is fine between the two of you, then what's the problem?"

nini shot zack a glare and chuckled, "a five minute twitter conversation doesn't mean that everything between ricky and i is okay. there are still a lot of things unspoken—"

"— then talk to him, neens."

"im too scared to talk to him."

"why are you so scared to talk to him?" zack asked nini with concern, "do you still ... yanno...love him?"

"..what? of course, not," nini quickly said as her eyes were stuck on the coffee machine, "i've moved on... i just don't really know where we stand... it's been so long since everything."

"you need closure," zack pointed out. nini grabbed the creamer and poured it into her mug as zack's words rung through her ears, "you're never gonna get better if you don't get closure."

the girl let out a sigh but stayed silent as she thought about what to say. zack nervously watched nini as she focused on finishing up her cup of coffee. nini finally spun around and took a sip, "i guess you're right..."

zack let out a sigh of relief and smiled, "when am i not?!"

"when you decide what clothes you're gonna wear in the morning," nini challenged back before a small snicker left her mouth. zack rolled his eyes but chuckled as well. 

"whatever, i'll let that slide because i know this is a hard thing for you to do," zack softly said as he gave nini an encouraging smile. he grabbed his phone out of his pocket and got up from his seat, "i'll make some calls. i'll try and see if ricky could come down later this afternoon."

nini's head shot up and she looked at zack with astonishment, "wait what?? you want me to see him today?"

"well if you're both free...then why not?" zack asked in a nonchalant voice, "we don't know when the next time he can meet up will be. plus, we gotta get this collaboration out while you two are still trending." 

"if i knew i'd see ricky today, i wouldn't have drank so much coffee," nini whined, "now i'ma be even more jittery and anxious than i already am!"

zack chuckled and shook his head, "geez neens, what cup of coffee is that?"

nini looked down, "my third."

"you're third?" zack asked again, "nini, it's only ten in the morning."

"only?? i should be at my fourth cup by now," nini sarcastically said with a smile. zack rolled his eyes and gave the girl a light smile.

"okay really, i'm gonna go make some calls," zack announced as he started to step out the room, "try and come up with some song ideas for you and ricky!"

nini nodded her head. zack finally left the room and the girl felt a whole weight lift off her shoulders. she placed her coffee cup down and looked around the recording studio once again. zack and nini's conversation was replying over and over in the girl's mind while she thought about what just happened. 

nini quickly sat down at the keyboard and grabbed her phone. she rose her fingers to the keyboard and found herself replaying "D" and "Am". the girl brought out her phone and started to record herself. nini let out a deep breath and closed her eyes.

"i...fell in love...with a boy and i can't tell if i fell out..." nini softly sang, "after all is said and done.... " the girl got frustrated as she got stuck on the lyrics. nini groaned as she laid her head down on the keyboard from stress. 

meanwhile zack stepped into his office and quickly shut the door behind him. the man started to dial ricky with excitement running through his body.

"hey zack, what's up?"

"she's in!"

"what?"

"nini! she said she's down to collab with you!"

zack heard shuffling in the background and a door shut, "wait! are you serious?"

zack let out a chuckle, "yes, but i just talked to her man. i think you two should have a long serious talk before formally agreeing to this collaboration. it seems like the both of you need closure." 

"is that what nini wants?"

"it's what nini needs, yes."

ricky let out a sigh as he eyed the door to make sure lily wasn't walking in, "okay uh...if that's what she needs that i'm okay with it."

"great! any chance you can come in today?"

"uh ... i could come in probably at like one?"

"perfect, i'll see you then, bowen."

ricky let out a chuckle and shook his head, "hey! thanks by the way. you don't know how much this means to me."

zack sighed and fiddled with the pens on his desk, "well let's just hope it means something to nini too." 

ricky nodded his head, "and oh don't forget! you and i don't know each other yet, remember?"

zack let out a chuckle, "i'm sorry? who is this and why do you have my number?"

the curly headed boy let out a laugh and shook his head, "alright, one o'clock at moonlight records! got it!"

"see you later, stranger!"

"see you soon, stranger."

back in the studio, nini thought about what else to say as her fingers rested on the keyboard. she glanced at her cup of coffee. coffee always reminded her of the past when she worked at the cafe which eventually led to moments with ricky. the moment when she found out about lily, "after all is said and done.... i can't .... just pretend i'm moving on..."

nini felt her eyes start to water and her hands fell down to her lap. the girl looked at the keyboard in front of her with disappointment before quickly ending the voice memo. she quickly stepped out of the room only to run into zack.

"hey!! .... oh," zack's enthusiasm quickly decreased once he saw how water nini's eyes were, "are you okay? what happened?"

nini let out an awkward chuckle and nodded her head, "duh, why wouldn't i be? 

zack saw how much nini didn't want to talk about it so he decided to drop the whole conversation and start a new one, "one o'clock. today."

"that's when ricky's coming?"

"yup... is that okay?"

nini forced a smile and nodded her head, "yeah sure! i don't care."

zack gave the girl a reassuring smile, "this will be good for you, neens. i promise."

"yeah, i sure hope it is," nini quickly told zack before she stepped away. zack didn't say another word and went back towards the studio while nini took the elevator up to the roof. 

the girl knew that smoking wasn't doing her anything good, but in times like this — nini felt like they were the only things that helped her. even if was just for a moment.