No Homo

15

Liani above ^^

Jacksons POV:

Shitty small-town fair.

Essentially that's all this is. A small town, which for some reason is insistent on spending our low budget on a shitty fair. Just a bunch of carnival rides that will most likely kill me, greasy food that I somehow love (despite it causing a spike in my acne), and boring teenagers desperately trying to fit in with their friends. It's nothing special. Just a normal, boring fair; yet, I'm somehow terrified.

Terrified to fuck things up with Liam, that is. Worried he won't feel comfortable spending this time with me. Maybe he didn't want to go at all, and this will just be a miserable few hours for him. But if he didn't want to go, he wouldn't have said yes, right? Perhaps he only said yes to be nice, agreeing to come not to be rude. Or maybe he does want to spend time with me. 

God damnit, you're overthinking this Jackson.

Not that there's anything to overthink. It's not like this is a date, it's just two friends, hanging out at a fair. Just two friends being buddies, that's all. I hang out with Seth all the time as buddies, this is nothing different. I'm going to have a good time with Liam, and not stress out about making a fool of myself. I am just going to enjoy my time with him, as friends. Except, there is a difference here, the difference being one friend desperately wants to make out with the other. God help me.

"We're next in line, Jackson," Liam says softly, playing with his fingers under the rolled-up sleeves of my sweater. I blush, not realizing how deep into thought I was. I always seem to get this way when it comes to Liam, which is a problem because he seems to be the only thing I think about.

I give a soft smile before walking to the entrance of the fair, Lee following shortly behind me. Once at the ticket booth, a very pretty girl flashed us a smile. She seemed familiar, but I couldn't remember her name for the life of me. I think I have a serious problem with remembering who people are. Maybe I'm too self-obsessed. 

"Two tickets please," I state as I pull my wallet out of my pocket, digging for the cash. I noticed the worry on Liam's face as I handed the girl the money, so I sent him a soft smile to let him know it's no big deal before looking back to the girl in the booth.

As she handed back two red armbands, she sent me a questioning look, as if she was trying to decode something within me.

"Uhh, yes?"

"Hiya, I'm Liani, a friend of Bobby. You're her boyfriend, right?" The girl blurts out, causing me to jump slightly from the shock. I nod my head yes as Liam awkwardly rubs his arm while looking at the ground. God damn, we haven't been here ten minutes and he already feels uncomfortable. Whoopdey doo Jackson, you're already fucking things up.

The girl gives a small nod before shifting her gaze to Liam. She sends him a sympathetic smile, which I can only assume made him feel even more uncomfortable than he already was. She let out a small hum before speaking.

"I've never seen you before, who are you?" She begins with a sweet tone as if she was talking to a child, "Oh my god, are you Bobbys little brother? You look just like her! I didn't know she had a brother! Awh, are y'all meeting her to hang out?"

I internally groaned as she compared Liam to Bobby. They don't look that much alike, do they? Sure, they have similar characteristics, but it's not as if they're twins. Plus, their personalities are completely different from one another, and unique in their own way. While lost in my thoughts a sudden urge of guilt-filled within me.

I have a girlfriend. A beautiful and sweet girlfriend who has done nothing wrong. Yet here I am with Liam Winters, a boy who is constantly on my mind day and night. A boy who I would do anything for just to hold his hand. It just feels so wrong and everything in my brain is confused. Sure we are just here as friends, but still, it feels wrong. The intentions feel wrong. I'm certain this is not considered cheating, but it sure as hell feels like cheating.