dream smp crack/ one shots 🧍

sbi epik beach trip

Wilbur- 13

Techno-11

Tommy- 8

Phil- a reasonable dad age

~enjoy

-phil's pov

"TOMMY. FOR THE 5TH TIME, STOP THROWING THE BEACH BALL AT WILBUR." I shout at the child from the front seat of our crappy van. Techno snatches it from his small child arms and throws it out the window.

Tommy looks at him wide-eyed. "DAD! HE THREW OUT MY BEACH BALL!" He whines from his spot in the middle of the three of them.

"L" Wilbur says before returning to looking out the window at the miles of sand we were about to stop at.

"DAD! WIL IS BEING MEAN AGAIN!" He yells again. I roll my eyes and continue driving.

"Shut up kid, or I'll drown you when we get to our destination." Techno says and Tommy looks at him wide-eyed.

"DAD-!" Tommy starts before he catches himself. I chuckle and silently thank Techno even if it was a threat that he was probably serious about.

-time skip 5 minutes

"Alright boys, want to go swim?" I ask as i turn around with towels, sunscreen and a cooler with our snacks. I spot Tommy first, annoying a teenage girl. Oh my gosh.

-Tommys pov

"YUP and thats how I know that you don't have cooties." I finish explaining to this pretty woman.

"Piss off, kid." She tells me. HOW DARE SHE TALK TO ME LIKE THAT. She walks away with her guy friend. Ugh, woman.

I am yanked away by a arm.

"Oh, hello dad!" I say as I turn to face him.

"Son, you can't leave me to go talk to strangers. Do you want to get kidnapped?" He asks me. What kind of question is that?

"Well I mean, to be fair they probably have a way better-"

"Stay by my side." He sternly tells me. I open my mouth to argue.

"BUT WILBUR IS OVER THERE EATING SAND WITHOUT YOUR ASSISTANCE!" I whine while trying to free myself from his grip.

"Stay by my side."  He says while we start speed-running to where Wil is sat at the other side of the beach.

-Wilburs pov

I grab the small plastic shovel I stole from a child again and start to dig to the dryer sand. Its the best kind. I lick my fingers and give my arms a break from working when I get man handled.

"AH- oh hey father." I say. He doesn't look very pleased.

"Come on, we're going to find Techno." He says as he pulls me away from where I was sitting.

"BUT IM HUNGRY!" I say while trying to go back to the precious sand.

"YOU CAN'T EAT SAND, WIL." He says in his loud old man voice. Whats he mean? Yes i can, and i will.

I roll my eyes and follow his angry stride.

"WHERE DID TOMMY GO? UGH." He screams which attracts stares from the public. I wave at them and smile.

-Technos pov

I smack the shark again to prove that I'm stronger than it. It stares at me for a second before going for my left leg. It must have been deciding which body part looked the most meaty. Little does he know , I have two legs. I kick him with my right leg and i see a tooth from his mouth fall into the water. I quickly grab it and slip it into the pocket of my swim shorts.

It recovers quickly, going for the right leg that had caused the damage. He ends up losing 4 more teeth in the process. What a nimrod.

I hear screaming from the beach, probably father. I don't care much.

-Phils pov

"TECHNO! STOP FIGHTING THE SHARK!! TECHNO?? THAT THING COULD KILL YOU." I scream at him. Has he lost his mind? He's a 11 year old kid and he's fighting a shark.

"WOOOOOO YOU GOT IT TECHNO!!" Wil yells from beside me. Jumping up in the air excitedly.

"YEAH! YOU SHOW THAT THING WHOS BOSS!!" He yells again. Giving me a thumbs up when I look at him with tiredness.

" WHAT IS IT WITH YOU AND KILLING THINGS?!?" I yell louder at Techno. He either doesn't hear me or doesn't care. I expect the second. I hear a scream from a lady in the public. I turn to see Tommy in front of her, tugging on her dress. THESE CHILDREN. 

"Wilbur, stay here and make sure Techno doesn't die." I tell him as I turn to look at Techno one last time before running over to Tommy.

"Pfft he never dies." i hear Wilbur say as i leave.

-Tommys pov

-2 minutes earlier-

I'm walking around on the sand looking at all the different people before i walk over to a lady with a bikini top on and a skirt over her  bottoms, I'm assuming. I'm not sure how woman work. It's like they're a different species. I get to her and see a giant bug on her behind. My instinct is to hit it off, so i do.

-smack-

"AHH" She screams and turns around and hits me with her magazine.

"WHAT THE FRICK DUDE?! LOOK I GOT THE BUG!" I show her the dead bug guts on my hand. She looks mortified. I tug on the silk skirt she was wearing.

"Why do all you woman wear these? Just wear a bathing suit. So weir-" I get cut off by my dad yanking me away from her.

"I'm so sorry ma'am I was tending to my other child and he wondered off." He says to the lady.

She glares at us as we walk away. I stick out my tongue at her.

"TOMMY. GET IN THE VAN. WE'RE GOING HOME." He screams at me. Jeez.

"Nooo. Why can't we stay longer?" I whine as he straps me in the seat.

-Technos pov

I stare at the dead shark in the bloody water. I'm epic. I hear Wilbur yelling at me from the sand I look over and he has sand in his hand while cheering for me. I see Father running from our piece of trash we call a van.

I swim back over to shore and I hear Fathers yelling at me. I don't really listen to it

"WOOOOOOO TECHNOBLADE NEVER DIES" I say and Wilbur yells it after me while shoving sand into his mouth.

The public is staring at us as Father leads us to the van to leave. He mumbles under his breath while practicly pushing us to the van. I feel like this was our last beach trip.

a/n: credits to aclassynerd for the idea! 💙