Finding My Happiness (Bungou Stray Dogs Chuuya X OC) (BOOK 1)

Monster

Misaki sat at the table with her head leaning against her hand, her finger tapping her cheek. She looked down at the food completely bored. She wasn't even eating, she simply just moved the food around with her chopsticks.

The door opened behind her. She turned around hoping to see Chuuya. But her eyes saddened when he wasn't there. She sighed in disappointment before turning back around.

"Jeez, are you really that unhappy to see me?" Odasaku asked sarcastically.

"I'm sorry. I was just hoping to see Chuuya." Misaki said.

Odasaku took the seat next to her as the owner plopped down a plate in front of him. "I know, things have been a bit complicated between you both this past week."

"I've tried to get his attention, but he doesn't even want to look at me. I don't even remember what I did wrong." She frowned.

~

Chuuya looked down at the floor, his hands in his pocket as he walked around the building. He wasn't even sure where he was going. He headend been in the right headspace since the day before. Poor boy didn't even get a goodnight sleep.

Finally getting it into his head that he was just wasting time, he headed the other way back to his office.

As he was about to turn the corner of the hallway, he saw a small glimpse of Misaki standing outside his door. Quickly, he turned the other way and hid behind the wall.

He could hear her knock a few times, but she never got an answer. "Chuuya?" She called out. The boy couldn't help but hold his breath.

Misaki opened the door slightly, only to not see him there. She frowned. Her eyes saddened as she closed the door and started walking the other way.

Relived that she was finally leaving, Chuuya let out a large sigh. She was the last person he wanted to see or talk to. After what happened, he wasn't sure when he would be able to see her after what she most likely saw. He couldn't face her.

~

Chuuya stood in the middle of the hallway, watching the sunset set as he tried to clear his head. His head was full of negative thoughts. All he could think about was Misaki, and what she could be possibly be thinking about at this moment. She was most likely divulged by him. Maybe even scared. He was sure, but he really didn't doubt it would come to that.

He took his hands out of his packet and brought them closer up. Taking off one of his gloves, he stared at his hand. Looking at made him feel dangerous.

"Chuuya?"

His eyes widened in fear. I slowly turned to his left and saw Misaki staring at him from afar. Too preoccupied with his own emotions, he wasn't even able to see the hurt expression on Misaki.

Using his hat to cover his face, he turned the other way and started walking in the other direction. "Chuuya?" She called out once more.

He completely ignored her, and continued walking away. She didn't even bother calling his name once more. She was hurting, and the boy couldn't be bothered to try and see how she was feeling.

~

"Chuuya?" Misaki called out.

He ignored her. Hearing her voice hurt. But for her, not hearing a single word from him hurt her ten times more.

"Chuuya?" She called once more.

No answer. Misaki couldn't hold it in any longer. She had finally snapped.

"Dammit Chuuya! Talk to me!" She shouted, forcefully grabbing his arm and preventing him from walking any further.

He didn't want to be so blunt and rude, but it seemed like that was his only solution.

He sighed in annoyance. "Cant you see that I need some space." He said bluntly. Taken aback, she loosened her grip on his arm. Chuuya pulled his arm away from her and started heading back in the other direction, not bothering to give her a single glance.

She was left there hurting. Her head hung low as her face saddened more. Feeling an arm on her shoulder, she turned around to see Dazai. "Let's get some air. You look like you need it."

~

"I think he hates me." Misaki said, her head hanging low.

"He doesn't hate you."

"And how are you so sure?" She asked.

Odasaku sighed. "Just try talking to him once more. Maybe you'll get an answer out of him this time." He suggested.

"And how am I going to do that? He won't stop hiding from me." Misaki asked.

"You're a smart girl. Figure it out. Straight off the bat, I could already think of one idea." Odasaku said.

Misaki shook her head in annoyance. But an idea suddenly popped into her head. She stood up from her said and ran out the door, leaving Odasaku by himself and her food with him.

~

Chuuya was dreading to see Dazai. Seeing the sudden message to meet him in Dazai's office, he knew his day was going to get worse. He was already having to deal with trying to avoid Misaki, and not he would most likely be getting scolded by her best friend.

But he would most likely have his ass beaten by Dazai. Chuuya wouldn't blame him. He probably deserves it for avoiding Misaki for so long.

Chuuya's head hung low as he held onto the door handle and pushed it open. He souls the be bothered to look at Dazai. "Thanks for coming Chuuya." Dazai said.

"Look, I know that-"

"Well looks like my jobs done, I'll leave the both of you to chat alone now." Dazai said. He stood up from his seat and left the room.

Confused, Chuuya watched him leave, but saw Misaki leaning against the wall with an angry expression. He had never seen her look so mad ever. "Misaki?"

She didn't say a ward as she pushed herself off the wall and walked towards Chuuya. He could see it coming, all the anger she was about to let out. Dammit Dazai.

Gripping his shoulder, she didn't hesitate to knee his stomach so hard. Chuuya fell to the floor and let out a painful groan. He slightly looked up and saw her hands balled up into a fist. She clearly wanted to punch him, but she was still holding back.

Instead, she grabbed him by his collar and pulled him off the floor, pinning him to the wall. "Why the hell are you ignoring me." She growled. Chuuya's head hung low. He couldn't look her in the eyes.

"Like I said, I just need some space." He lied.

"Cut the bullshit, Chuuya! What's the real reason!"

He couldn't lie anymore, but he was still so hesitant. To look at her. To talk to her. He was afraid. Afraid of what she probably thought of him. Afraid of what was most likely to come. Afraid of somehow ruining it all.

Chuuya could feel her hands starting to shake. And for the first time in a while, he finally had the courage to look up. Her head hung low, but she looked like she wanted to cry. But she never cried. And having known her for so long, her shaking hands were a sign that she was crying on the inside.

He'd hurt her. He'd put her in pain. And he was too arrogant and preoccupied on himself that he couldn't see how much pain she was in.

"Talk to me please." Misaki begged. Her voice was quivering. "I don't know what I did wrong. But I can't stand being ignored and avoided. But talk to me, please. Isn't avoiding me for over a week long enough? I need you Chuuya."

Her hands were still shaking. She was in pain. She was hurting. But even seeing her like this, the fear still took over Chuuya. He was monster. And it would only be a matter of time till she would realize that.

She has already been in pain these past few years. If she saw the real him, he knew it would only make it worse.

"I'm sorry, I can't tell you."