Watching Over You • Nomin

twelve

“Kiss me,” she said, softly.

It's a shame that he never noticed how beautiful she looked. Silky beautiful hair with beautiful doe eyes, she was stunning. Intimidating yet so fragile looking… face so perfect as though sculpted… god's favorite indeed. An adorable sweet little smile spreading over her beautiful lips. So magnificent and heart fluttering and demanded his eyes look at her over and over again.

This feels so wrong. He felt like he was going to puke any minute, he was feeling so sick or like someone stabbing him. 

“Kiss me, I know you love me more than anything else in the world,” she repeated as she held his cheeks. Those beautiful hands were so soft. He closed his eyes, it felt so different, so right… yet something wasn't feeling right.

“I do…”

He went for it. There will be consequences. The last he wanted to see was Jaemin being hurt. And when his eyes opened, it was worse than he imagined. Jaemin wasn't tearing up, he saw him, he knew he was caught.

He couldn't read him in any way. He didn't seem hurt, he didn't seem angry. And that seemed like the worst nightmare ever. It was scary. The look made him die a hundred times that second and everything fell apart. Everything he had promised, broke into atoms.

It felt like an apocalypse and he wanted to end it all.

------

The thing Jeno knew was his head was spinning. Still, his eyes closed, he tried to change his sleep position but ended up on the ground. He was still feeling sick.

Worst dream ever.

He opened his medications drawer and took some pills. He dragged himself into the kitchen and poured himself a glass of water. He was now wide awake and aware of his surroundings. His memories were coming back to him.

Jiya cackled. “Look at your face! You just got tricked! I was just joking…” she said. “Or was I?”

And Jeno's next instinct was to walk out of the library. He was never so angry at anyone. He didn't want to see her face ever again.

But all he did was force a smile. And sat through another few minutes until he gulped his rage down and came home.

The dream felt more real than what happened in reality. He remembered every piece of it so perfectly. He never remembers his dreams… Why was this being an exception? He doesn't want to remember that this happened. He doesn't want to remember that Jiya asked him to kiss her or the nightmare that followed. He doesn't want to remember her existence as a whole.

He thought he loved to piss off Jaemin for fun but his anger was his worst nightmare and the scariest movie. He doesn't even remember when he came home and when he dozed off. Jaemin should be here any moment. He wanted to see him. He wanted another proof that what he dreamed was just a dream. He was not a degraded human who would cheat on someone who he considered to be the most precious person in his life. 

Now his head was throbbing. It feels like someone had drugged him… or hit his head. Why does everything seem like a hallucination?

He heard a faint knock on his door. He knew Jaemin would be here. He immediately rushed towards his door and found him standing there with his beautiful smile.

He could hear his heartbeat. He could feel his blood rushing through his arteries and veins. The apocalypse never happened, nothing has been torn apart. Jaemin's smile had said everything. It was just a dream.