Mad Woman✓

8. Fight with you

"I know heaven's a thing... I go there when you touch me, honey hell is when I fight with you."

   POV JOE ALWYN:

I drop the bags on the floor. Taylor walks into the house right after me and puts her hand on my shoulder. "What do you think?"

We left early this morning and drove all day in our new Maserati to our new place near the coast.

And it's perfect.

The house is small in comparison to Harlow or Taylor's house, but it is cosy and beautiful. From the ivy climbing up the walls to the small backyard that's a mess of flowers and grass.

It even smells nice here. Flowers, summer and beach.

"It's wow.. Just- I never imagined I would ever live in a house like this." Even the light floor is lovely.

"We can't stay here for long. Maybe three months."

"That doesn't matter, it's perfect anyway." I almost lean in to kiss her lips but hold back. I can't just go around and kiss her. We're nothing. Just friends that pretend to be married so we don't get killed.

After Taylor had told me about her past, I have been having nightmares. She knows. I woke up in the middle of the night, emptying my stomach in the toilet. Every night since the night she told me, I wake up covered in sweat, restless.

So Taylor has been keeping her distance. Which might be worse than waking up multiple times a night, with a racing heart.

I don't want her to keep her distance.

I know she thinks it is the right thing to do, but it isn't.

She is acting like I am scared of her. I am not.

I am not even scared of this gang we're running from. I don't care about them hurting me.

I am scared of Taylor getting hurt by them. She's on the verge of breaking and I don't want anything to happen that will actually break her. I want her to be happy, smiling.

In all my nightmares, Taylor gets hurt and I'm just standing in a dark corner, unable to move. Taylor's big, fearful eyes begging me to help her. But whether the dark figures slice her throat with a sharp knife or hold her underwater in a golden bathtub, I can't move. I can't speak. I can't do anything. I can't even wake up. Not until she dies right in front of me.

"We should take a shower, put our stuff away and say hi to our new neighbours, probably", she says. I nod and without saying anything, I walk back to the car to grab the last suitcases.

The house itself is already completely equipped. Taylor told me there's even a sauna in the backyard. I haven't really looked around yet. I will tomorrow when I am less tired.

Mom would love it here.

I go to our bedroom on the first floor and place our suitcases and bags in front of the wardrobe. Taylor is organizing her makeup in the bathroom.

The sun is shining through the window slats, therefore the room is covered in a golden glow.

The bedroom is bigger than I had expected it to be. The walls are a soft yellow colour and the bed in the middle of the room is big, with pink sheets. There is a night table on either side of the bed and this large wardrobe on the other side of the room.

The bathroom is attached to the bedroom and I watch Taylor as she softly hums a song, moving her body slightly to her own rhythm.

She is really very beautiful.