Chapter 32

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Gabrielle's POV

I was going to go back to my old house. The reason for it was because it was going to be my way of commiting suicide. But indirectly. I still love Jack. I always will. Him and his family have treated me so well these past few months and I'm so grateful. I just can't hold them back anymore and Jack kissing Kate was my way out.

As Jack leaves the room I sit back on the bed. What if my dad comes here and hurts the Gilinsky's? He knows that I'm here. He knows more than I thought. I can't put them in danger. I can't be the cause for anyone being hurt. Especially Jack. If anything happened to him, I'd never forgive myself. Eventhough he may have hurt me, it's not much compared to the pain I've felt before.

Being in love is like when you lean on a bar when you're high up off of the ground. You put all of your weight on it and basically trusting your life with it. It looks like it won't ever fall or give out because it won't, right? Wrong. You think that it looks really sturdy and you trick yourself into believing that. You lean on it and look down anyways because you want to see what is below you.

I feel like my bar broke. Jack was my bar. I trusted him with my life and it seemed too much for him so he gave out. He let me fall. I'm on the ground gasping for air. I'm not fearing for my feelings, I'm fearing for his. I'm basically dying and I'm thinking about how Jack is not myself.

I hear two knocks at the door, interrupting my thoughts.

"C-come in-n," I slightly yell. His hair is slightly ruffled and he slouches. Why is he back?

"Five minutes," he says, holding up 5 fingers. I nod because I know that if I try to speak, I'd begin crying. He sits down right next to me. I just want to fall back into his arms and be with him for the rest of my life. But that's not how this works. "I know Kate kissed me and I kissed back."

"G-great st-tart," I roll my eyes.

"But, I hate her. I don't know why I kissed her back. And I'm being completely honest with you. I'm still in love with you, Gabrielle. I will never stop loving you. I'll do anything to be with you again. Just please forgive me." He grabs my hand. I look down and notice the bright red lines on his wrist. Jack notices that I saw and he automatically pulls his hand away and pulls his sleeve down. Seeing his new scars hurts my heart. He's hurting and he didn't come to me. Eventhough I'm mad at him, I still would have wanted him to come to me instead of resorting to cutting. I grab his arm and run my fingers over his scars. He winces in pain when I get to his newer scars. I look up at him with worry in my eyes.

"If you ever feel like you have to cut, please talk to me. Even if I might be unhappy with you, please don't feel like you have to do this to yourself. I'll always be there for you, Jack." Jack nods. I notice that if he tried to say anything he'd cry too. We both lean in and our lips connect. I get a weird feeling in my stomach. I feel like I'm falling in love with him all over again.

"Please don't leave," Jack begs. I place my hand on the side of his jaw.

"I have to eventually." I smile at him, trying to reassure that when I leave it won't be for a bad reason.

"You're so beautiful," Jack says while tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. His warm hand brushes against my cheek.

"I love you, Jack."

"I love you."

"Don't you mean 'I love you too'?" I tease.

"No, not 'too.' That implies that I love you in addition to you loving me. I'd love you even if you didn't love me." His words make my stomach fill with butterflies.

Ten minutes later we're laying under the covers together. My head rests on Jack's bare chest. I listen to his steady heartbeat. He plays with my hair as my hand rests on his abs. He smells of cologne. Being with Jack is my safe haven. I wish I didn't have to leave. I wish for a lot of things that won't ever happen.

My eyes slowly get heavy and the last thing I hear is the beat of Jack's heart.
*
*
"Wake up! Laura and Molly are leaving." My eyes flutter open to see Jack throwing a shirt over his head.

I get downstairs with my crutches and see that Molly and Laura are saying goodbye to Katherine and David. They don't realize that I'm standing there until Jack comes up behind me. He wraps his arms around my waist and I giggle.

Molly walks over to me. "I'll miss doing your hair and makeup, Gab!" I laugh and give her a hug.

"I'll m-miss you t-too, Molly."

"You better treat her right," she sternly tells Jack. He rolls his eyes while smiling and then hugs Molly.

"I'll miss you Gabrielle. It was so fun hanging out with you," Laura exclaims while she gives me a hug. "He really loves you," she whispers as we're still in the hug.

I blush and then say, "Bye Laura."
*
*
After Molly and Laura leave Katherine calls me and Jack into the back room. I sit down on the couch and Jack sits beside me, holding my hand.

"Gabrielle, I don't want to come off too strong but, how come you never told me and David about your parents?" Busted. How'd she find out? Did Jack tell her? I thought I made it clear that I didn't want to tell anyone yet. "Did you think that we would kick you out or something?" To be honest, I don't know the exact reason why I never told them. I automatically feel guilty. Then I look over at Jack, who has his head down. I shrug. I feel the tears coming. I can't break down in front of Katherine and Jack. I stand and run out of the room. I hear Katherine call my name but Jack stops her.

I thought Jack was going to let me tell someone on my own? It was my business. Not his. He shouldn't have said anything. I need to get out of here. I need to get away from him. He's causing me pain and I can't take anymore of it. I might as well just end my life now. It's not like Jack would care anyways. All he wants to do is hurt me. I just hate that I'm still in love with him. Despite my anger, I will always be in love with Jack Finnegan Gilinsky. I just can't take this anymore. I can't be a burden on the Gilinskys's shoulders. It's about time I leave.

I pick up the note I originally left on the bed. I pick up a pencil and notice my hand shaking. As I scribble out my closing statement and continue the note.

I'm still in love with you, Jack. I just can't take this anymore. Please don't look for me. I'm not worth wasting your time.

~Gabrielle

Later that night I wait until 1:30 in the morning. The floorboards creak underneath me and I clench my jaw hoping that no one will wake up. I take one last look at the room that has been my safe room for the past few months. I make one stop in Jack's room. Tears streaming down my face, I look at him and notice how peaceful he looks. How could such a beautiful boy be cursed with something so horrible? He doesn't deserve it. He never did anything wrong.

His eyes flutter open but I can tell that he was still half asleep.

"Gab?" he asks, his voice rusty.

"Shhh."

"Where are you going?" I stare down at him admiringly.

"It doesn't matter," I whisper.

"I wanna go with you," he says as his eyes widen a bit.

"Go back to sleep. I love you." With that, I give him a kiss on the forehead and he slips back into sleep.

I try so hard to keep my tears and sobs in but a few slip out. It takes me a few minutes to get down the stairs but I eventually get to the front door. With my bag slung over my shoulder and my crutches under my arms, I slip out the door.

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~A/N: Sorry its a short chapter AND sorry that its been so long since I've updated😭 Ily all and be sure to go check out the sequel to He's Not Dangerous its called He's Not Perfect by bballgurl26 AND ITS AMAZING AND GO BEG HER TO UPDATE NOW GO GO!💕

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