Hiding the Green Carnation's Heirs | ✓

23

Dedicated to: Pluti_queen, CarmelaCaunca, RebelliousSeductress, tinslyf1008, _bubbleyya, ylass1432,

Sharawawt to: Ellay Macarzy 

A/N: Here's an early update. I can't update tomorrow 'cause I remembered na may orientation pala kami. This update is kinda rush but I hope you enjoy it hihi! 

(Note: Kung nagpa-dedicate ka tapos hindi kita nalagay sa dedication area, please pardon me. 'Wag kayo magtampo kasi nakakalimutan ko talaga yung mga nagchachat huhu, much better kapag ichat niyo ulit ako gano'n but usually I'm not active on my messenger anymore, so you can reach me here. Send me a private message or post on my message board.)

~*~

"DO you want some pancakes, bambolina?" he asked while eyeing me.

I forced a smile before nodding at him. Tinitigan niya muna ako ng ilan pang segundo bago niya kinuha ang walang lamang plato ko saka ako tinalikuran.

Mabilis na bumagsak ang ngiti ko at napatitig na lang sa likod niya. I watched on how his muscles flex and how his clothe traces them everytime he moves.

I bite my lower lip as I stop my tears from falling. I swallowed before averting my eyes away from him. Every time I look at him, I can feel my heart clenching. Parang sinasaksak ang puso ko kapag naririnig ko ang boses niya at kapag nakayakap siya sa akin. Nalulungkot ako kahit na kasama ko siya.

The butterflies I felt in my stomach whenever he's near, completely vanished. Ang sayang nararamdaman ko kapag kasama ko siya, bigla na lang napalitan ng lungkot at sakit. Every touch of him is like a fire that burns my skin in a very painful way.

Ever since that night, when he said those words, it felt different. Whenever I'm with him, it's painful.

Alam kong may napapansin siya pero hindi lang siya nagsasalita. I know that he can feel my coldness towards him but he would shrug it off with a wide smile making it more painful.

He is acting like everything is fine but for me, it's not.

Slowly, day by day, it's getting hard and sad. Our relationship is slowly sinking but he keeps on sailing.

I thought everything would be fine. I thought that if I attached myself to him, it would be easy but it isn't.

I attached myself to him because of my kids. I let my guard down around him for my kids' sake but he has said it. He doesn't want any kids yet then I suppose, I already got the answer I wanted.

Ang mga anak ko ang dahilan kung bakit ko piniling makasama siya at madikit sa kaniya at ngayon, wala ng dahilan pa para manatili ako sa tabi niya. It is all over between us.

Pero kahit na anong pilit ko, kahit na anong gawin ko, parang dinudurog ang puso ko kapag iniisip kong makikipaghiwalay ako sa kaniya. Hindi ako makahinga ng maayos at libo-libo ang sakit na nararamdaman ko.

"Bambolina? Are you okay?"

Bumalik ako sa reyalidad at nag-angat ng tingin. I saw Lurusus silently examining me and there's a hint of worry and sadness in his eyes.

Hindi ko namalayan na iniwas ko pala ang tingin ko sa kaniya. I can't stare at him for too long. Para akong maiiyak at ayaw kong umiyak sa harap niya.

"Yeah, I'm fine," sagot ko na lang at kinuha mula sa kamay niya ang hawak-hawak niyang plato na pancake.

I sliced it into tiny pieces and forced myself to eat even though I don't have the appetite. I tried to eat it little by little. Baka mamaya magtaka siya at magtanong pa. As much as possible I don't want to talk to him or look at him.