All By Myself

Charmaine's Diary

Don't judge a book by its cover.

I took a deep breathe. I could see their faces when I snatched Charmaine's hands.

"No, do it yourself", I whispered.

"Look guys, Muted Stella finally talked", chuckled Minar.

Elise grabbed my shirt by the collar. She was yanking it so it was extremely hard to breathe. I tried to gasp for air but didn't work.

"What did you say?" she asked rhetorically.

"Leave her alone!" Charmaine demanded.

Elise pushed me hard and I fell down to the floor. My arm was soaring with pain but I stood up.

Fiona snatched Charmaine's homework from her hand and teased her about her teeth again. Charmaine was frozen and I had absolutely no idea on what to do. I tried to chase after them as they left but Charmaine grabbed my hand and shook her head.

"Sorry about that." I apologized.

"It's not your fault." she muttered and took out another fresh piece of paper and started to redo the homework.

"Char, you don't need to redo it, copy off mine.", I suggested.

"No, it's fine, do more research.", she said in an upset voice.

I knew she was upset. I didn't know how to cheer her up. She always cheered me up when I was down but I am not sure how she did it.

I glanced and smiled at her and took notes from the book she gave me. We sat in silent for almost an hour. I occasionally heard Charmaine sob and whimper. I wish I could help her. I wish she could tell me more about her. Is she ok?

The day went by slowly. The rest of the school day was just class that involves me staring at the clock. Tick Tok Tick Tok. Waiting for the day to pass was dreadful. I was bored in class but there's nothing I could do about it except study. Charmaine seemed to hate class as well. She was fidgeting with her pen most of the time.

I could barely hear my teacher talking. I could only hear my brain talk. I couldn't recall what they were saying but I knew there were some voices that belonged to Elise, Minar, Fiona and Hilary. I was constantly worried about Charmaine as well.

The bell finally rang and Charmaine and I were on the bus. Evelyn wasn't there today, I looked forward to seeing her. We didn't speak much, Charmaine and I. She was staring at the window. The scenery of the city, buildings and people. The sun was burning the windows, it was too hot to even touch.

"Charmaine, are you ok?" I finally asked.

"I am fine." she smiled. "I don't want to go home though."

"You can always stay at mine" I said.

"I wish but we have a lot of homework today"

I noticed she was holding a book in her hand. It was pink and a hard cover, based on my vision. She was clutching on it so I could barely see what it was. I didn't pay much attention to it.

A couple minutes later, we reached Charmaine's stop and we said goodbye then she left. She looked like she was about to enter hell from her expression. How bad can her home life be? I've been there loads of times and her parents seems like the nicest people in the world. They showered her with love and attention. She's an only child so that makes sense.

I looked over to her seat and I saw she left the book there. I grabbed it. It had a cardboard cover with flower prints on it. It had her name engraved on the bottom of the book. "Charmaine Aldric Rowena Elizabeth Aphelion" it read. Her name is so long. I don't understand why would her parents make her name so complicated. She has 3 middle names! Maybe, it's their way to show people how smart the Alphelions are. There was a ribbon that secured the book and we have to fasten it to open it. The book looked old. There were some pen marks on the cover. I was about to open the pages when I reached home. I put the book safely in my bag and went home.

"Hello mum, hello dad." I greeted my parents.

Mum gave me a kiss on my forehead and told me to go do my homework. I didn't see where Elliot was so maybe he was doing things in his room. It's normal to hear explosions from his room because he spent his day doing science experiments. There was no time to waste so I ran up the stairs, making thumps sounds as I stomped up.

I put my backpack on my chair and went to the room of requirement. I sat on the comfortable reading couch and opened the book. It was her diary. I hesitated. I didn't know should I read it or not? Am I invading and privacy? I might find out what's going on in her secret life though. I decided to read it.

18/05/2021

I had a good day at school. Estella was terrified of the frogs. It was funny to watch. Mother and Father are arguing again. What is it now? I heard yelling from the living room. I can tell it was mother. I heard a glass shatter. Is father hurting Mother? I couldn't understand what they were saying. They were speaking French. What is it that they have to hide from me? They damaged me enough already. What's more to hide. I don't feel worthy anymore. I think they are arguing because of me. I heard my name many times. It's my fault for their struggle in their relationship. It's all my fault. If I died, maybe they would get back together? I tried all I could to make them proud. I got really good grades, I played musical instruments and I even helped around the house? I am not enough and I'll never be.

I started to cry. I kept exaggerating my problems to her and she kept quiet about hers. What if I lose her? I would be all alone. I would lose my best friend. I would lose my happiness.