Missed Times

Chapter Three

I'm getting so frustrated to waking up again in this stupid bed with more questions in my head. I want to run as far as possible, but I can't seem to even make it out of this room. Amelia is checking the machines again and I'm just staring forward, my whole body hurts but I don't mention a thing, I need to be out of here as soon as possible. Carina is in Italy and if she is not on her way here or at least called I have this bad feeling that there's something going on between us. The fact that they don't even want to mention her to me proves my point. Oh, no, what have I done to her? I know it must be my fault, she's perfect, she wouldn't do anything to hurt me, whereas I am the broken one, the stubborn, selfish, self-destructive Maya. As much as I feel Carina makes me a better person deep down I'm still my father's daughter.

"Maya, everything is fine. You're good, you're safe," Amelia tries to calm me down since she clearly sees me sobbing.

She hugs me and I tense up, but she doesn't lose her grip on me, she probably thinks that I need this. A few moments later I pull back and wipe my tears away.

"Why didn't you tell me Carina is in Italy?" I look directly at Amelia's eyes.

"Who told you that?" Amelia says taken aback.

"I got my memory back," I lie. "I must've hit my head when I was up."

"Nice try," Amelia's face softens.

"It's my memory, I would know if I'm remembering things or not," I try one more time.

"That's true, but no one has ever gotten their memories back by hitting their head again, and you cannot remember something you didn't know before your accident."

"What?" I ask in shock.

"Maya you," Amelia hesitates.

"No!" I exclaim. "I should've known, you say we're in April, it's the anniversary of Andrew's death, I should've known she was going to go. Why wouldn't I? She's my wife for fuck's sake!"

I punch the bed in anger, and my throat gets tight. This is what I've been trying to put off to the back of my head when no one would tell me anything about her.

"Amelia, is Carina coming back?"

Amelia doesn't get a chance to answer my question because there's a knock on the door, Amelia backs away from the bed and when the door opens everything stops. There she is, my tall and beautiful wife, looking the way she always does, so stylish and elegant.

"Carina," I manage to say as I move in my bed forward like I'm about to jump out of it to run to her.

Amelia takes a step closer and touches my arm. I feel like I can breathe again just by knowing she's here, she came. She looks confused and she takes a few steps inside the room, I immediately touch the bandage on my head, she must be terrified seeing me like this.

"Maya," She whispers as she takes her hand to her chest.

She looks relieved, but I can't really tell what's going on through her mind, she doesn't move and her eyes look sad.

"Carina, I'm so sorry, I love you, please forgive me," I blurt out.

This is what I needed to tell her since I was running, she needs to know.

"I wasn't thinking, I know what we vowed to, even if we didn't say it out loud. I swear our wedding was the best thing that's ever happened to me, it was beautiful and full of love, and..." I stop because Carina has wide open eyes like she doesn't get where I'm coming from, her arms are crossed and she's looking back and forth between me and Amelia.

"Maya, look at me please," Amelia says and I begrudgingly look at her. "Can you tell me the year?"

"Seriously?" I complain.