HIM and My WHYS [ PerthSaint ] Unedited

Chapter 5: Too shy

S A I N T

It's weekend. I was sitting on a chair I set up on the corner of my dorm's balcony. Fresh air and the right amount of sunlight on a saturday morning is so relaxing. I already had my breakfast and I'm currently finishing my coffee, which I prefer more than tea's.

I sat here for about an hour already reflecting about the things that happened in my week. After that day that Perth offered me a ride to school, I never saw him again. Nosy Win said he was out of town for a competition again. His absence was a mix of good and bad for my heart. Falling inlove really is crazy.

I suddenly remembered the conversation Win, Mean and I had during that day where they found out that I like Perth.

•

" WHAT?! " I shouted as a response to Win's stupid suggestion.

" What? " He asked back obviously making fun of my reaction.

" Asshole. " Mean said while giving Win a smack on his shoulder. It wasn't that hard but Win gasped and acted like he was hurt, Mean just rolled his eyes.

" You can't just confess to someone like that, specially if you just met that someone days ago. " Mean said. " Besides, we don't even know if Perth feels the same way, Saint will just be heart broken in the end. " He added.

" But how will we know if he don't try. " Win said.

" Are you even listening to me Win? Perth is straight as far as I can remember, I interviewed him last school year for the school's paper, I asked him what is his type and he answered that he likes an honest and cheerful GIRL. I just don't want Saint to be hurt. " Mean explained.

It made us 3 pause. I understand both of their point.

" Are you sure that you like him Saint? Maybe it's just admiration or infatuation. " Mean suddenly asked.

" I know it happened too fast. I know it's seems impossible. But I can assure you that I'm a hundred percent sure that I like him. I never felt this way to anyone before I met him. " I explained. Mean gave me a small smile.

" I won't object. It's you who truly know how you feel. But you understand my point right? "

" I understand both of your point. " I told Mean then look at Win too who were smiling at me. " Win, you want me to be brave enough to confess before it's too late. " I told Win when I faced him. He gave me a smile and a small nod telling I'm right.

He's right on the part that we'll never know unless we try. The consequences for it may either be acceptance or rejection. Happiness or pain. No one knows unless we try.

" While Mean, you just don't want me to get hurt. " I told Mean while facing him. He gave me smile as well.

Mean sees the situation more logically. Perth is a straight boy, he likes girls, had always been. If I try to confess, he might reject me on the spot because I'm a boy. And Mean knows it, that's why he's stopping me to confess because I'll just end up being hurt, in pain that might ruin me since 'it hurts during your firsts' right?

" This feelings I have for him is new to me. At first I don't know what to do with it, but now hearing both of your opinion, I finally have my answer. " I paused for a while. They were just silently listening to me.

" It's nice to be brave and bold sometimes, that way it'll be faster and easier to move on if rejected. The pain that I'll feel if it happens will just be as normal like the happiness I'll feel if it's outcome will be the other way around. " I paused a bit to take a breath. " I'm not afraid of the challenge of confessing to Perth. I'm also not afraid of being rejected and hurt. " I added after.