TURN BACK THE TIME, BABE. BOOK 4. SUNNY SKIES BREAK THROUGH BEHIND THE CLOUDS

TOMORROW WHO KNOWS WHAT'S JUST IN STORE FOR ME

The gynaecologist told everything worked out fine. They made me a curettage and Nina Barron was not pregnant anymore. No Harris, No Freddie, nobody. I asked on and on about the sex of my baby and they told me it was a girl though I knew it almost since I conceived her by chance in that american tour.

I wanted to see her but that medical team were a bunch of stuffy with not an ounce of emphaty in their fucking bodies.

- It's not good for you.

- What have you done to her? I want to hold her in my arms. Please...

I would call her like me. I didn't know if I would choose my artistic name or my real name but she would call like me. I figured out she was the first thing truly mine and those monsters had thrown her as she was an used sanitary towel.

- Why is it not good for me? Why?

- Miss Barron, the foetus had lived longer than expected and...

- What do you mean?

- She probably was dead since days...

- It can't be. My daughter was moving constantly. She was not dead. I want to see her.

I guess when someone loses things and Nina-Caitlin had been a bothersome thing inside my womb, you start to appreciate it. I never thought thad could happen to us. We were such a great team. We were together to feel happy at last with the man who was meant to be mine forevermore.

When I was calmed they explained to me I had had a serious placental separation. I lost so much blood that apart from needing a transfusion, the bleeding was so violent that they had to perform a hysterectomy.

I had no womb anymore. I would never get pregnant again.

The doctors and nurses eyes over me could be pity or clear animosity glances. I guess they alternated sometimes. Obviously though I had a miscarriage this time, I had helped actively to it. They knew I had traces of coke on my blood. They knew the type of mother I had been. And now I asked for my baby.

But when I saw Freddie walking into the room and came over me with his most beautiful worried eyes at the foot of my bed, my womb stopped to hurt so far.

- Freddie... you shouldn't be here -I mumbled receiving a kiss on my lips that seemed to shoot me vitamines all of a sudden.

- Why shouldn't I be here?

- Because I think you hated me so much last night and now you'll hate me more.

- Don't worry about that. Probably I must to bear the cross for having lock you down and having that stress. I was a wild beast. And look at you now...

I couldn't believe what my ears were hearing. Freddie had already taken the blame on him for my miscarriage and the truth that suited me just fine. Not only for my own conscience but also to try to grasp the little we had in common. If there was no baby, a lot of things didn't make sense between us and I didn't want even to think about it.

- Don't worry about it now, love. Just tell me you'll keep loving this barren woman come what may.

- You know you'll always be my friend.

Friend? Yes, fucking great. Being Freddie Mercury's friend was a luxury at this stage of his life and in the future it will be even more but which place of his life I stood in? Did my miscarriage mean there would be no more explosive encounters between us?

- I'm not living in Stafford Terrace anymore, am I?

- You can stay as long as you need. Don't think about that now.