Accidents Happen

4. A very important meeting

I was running late thanks to traffic. Despite leaving on time, even planning ahead to throw up in between tube stations. But when I arrived, I couldn't see him in the seating area. He knew. He already knew and he'd bailed. I wasn't surprised in the slightest. As to avoid looking stupid by walking right back out, I ordered a tea to take away. The thought of coffee was enough to bring on waves of nausea.

With tea in hand, I bowed my head and went to open the door from where I come in, but found it blocked with the familiar tall frame of my one night stand.

'Dan, sorry, I thought I'd missed you, I-' I already felt my cheeks burning red.

'I lost track of time, I'm so sorry. Do you need to go or...?' He held the door open for me. I could just go and pretend this never happened. I should never have asked him to meet up. I could've just dealt with it alone and no one would ever have known. But now we we're here. And there was no going back.

'No it's fine. Shall we...?' It was painfully awkward. And as we took our seats at the only free table, right in the middle of the place, I felt like everyone was watching us. I could hardly bring myself to look at him. My heart was racing. My palms were sweating, and not from the hot beverage I was grasping onto.

'So, how are you?' Dan finally spoke after what was only seconds but felt much longer.

'I'm ok. You?' I lied.

'Yeah, good, thanks.' He smiled. I met his eyes briefly. I hadn't really paid much attention to them before. It had, after all, been dark. But in the second that I could manage to hold contact, I couldn't believe how blue they were. Like, insanely blue. Now I didn't know if my cheeks were flushing because of that or because I was about to deliver a massive bomb right into his life. 'I erm, I need to apologise for what happened. I meant to call you, I was gonna ask Ben for your number but I didn't want him thinking I'd...you know, got with his friend and-'

'I'm pregnant.'I had to just come out and say it. Like tearing off a bandaid.

He stared at me. I could see the terror in his eyes. I didn't want to push him for a verbal response. I let him sit there and think as I nervously played with my hands. If the silence that had fallen before was hard, this was something else entirely. This was equally sickening and destroying. Was he thinking about running the hell out of there? I wouldn't blame him. If i could do the same, I would. To never have to deal with this.

'I'm so sorry.' I whispered when I couldn't take the silence another moment.

'Why are you sorry?' He said softly. Which shocked me.

'Because it's my fault and I didn't mean to do this, and I understand if you hate me and-'

'Ally, it's ok. I'm to blame here too. And I know you're probably as scared as me right now, but whatever happens, I'll be there. Ok?'

'Really?' I burst into tears. Of all the reactions I'd imagined in my head, this was not one of them. Without hesitation, he held my hand across the table.

'Yes. Did you think I would be angry?'

'Well yeah..you don't even know me and here I am telling you that I'm currently hosting a baby, your baby, and...'

'I know you're Bens friend and that's enough. Have you been to the doctors? Do you know how far along...?'

'About six weeks? I haven't told anyone yet, only Ben.'

'Ok. And what do you want to do? Have you thought about it?'

'Well not really, because I wanted to tell you first and...'