teddy bear

camel

Thursday March 19, 2015
6:14 AM

My Lovely Liv,

•I could look into your eyes
Until the sun comes up
And we're wrapped In light and life and love
Put your open lips on mine
And slowly let them shut
For they're designed to be together
With your body next to mine
Our hearts will beat as one
And we set alight
We're afire love•

I love when you find a song that completely explains how you feel. You don't need to say the words yourself, because they are said for you.
I'm not sure if you understand this feeling, or if you love music like I do.
in all honesty, it's been a while since I've properly listened to music. you have been my music. you are my muse, for songs not to be sung aloud but to be contained in me. not to be shared with the world. to be sung to only one person.
these songs are for you, Olivia.
they are about you and for you, in hopes that you will someday hear them.
find the music that speaks to you. that makes you feel alive. i have learned that if you find music that speaks for you it is easier for you to speak for yourself. the more you fall in love with music, the more you fall in love with yourself.

-

I now realize that I was writing these letters more for myself than for Olivia. I was wiring the words I needed to hear.
She was fixed. I didn't know it at the time. I didn't know she was fixed until I saw her walk out of her house that morning.
She walked out of her house with a smile on her face. She greeted the day with happiness and made the sun shine brighter.
I had no intention of stopping my letters though. I may have been able to fill the void in her heart, but if I stopped, the void forming in my heart would only continue to grow, until it devoured me and I no longer had the will to go on.

what is this bc idk pls help me I'm a bad writer
I know where this story is going I just don't know how to get there
it will get better I promise just hang in there