Since that spring break bet with Verosika Mayday we've been taking it easy. For about two weeks there hasn't been a call for us. Millie and I joked a few times that we may have settled the whole city's unfinished business. But it was great to get some time to ourselves.
So far Blitzø has been entertained by shooting the tv at the end of a commercial for target practice. A few of them I didn't mind but one caught my eye. It seemed to be our equivalent of our company I.M.P. But instead of wanting people dead C.H.E.R.U.B as they're called offers protection services for the world of the living. I know that heaven is supposed to be our enemy. But I can't help but feel allured by heaven. It felt like it was where I belonged. I wanted to be up there in heaven where it's safe and beautiful. But I'm stuck down here. Where I beg for scraps.
When I was little my grandpa would tell me that he fought in the war when Lucifer led the rebellion against heaven. I always marveled at the stories. My cousins and sister wouldn't be interested in his stories. But not me, I would just look up at him and listen to his tales of how he fought against the angels and survived. The rebellion against heaven was the bloodiest battle to date that no one has ever seen before or since.
A little baby cherub appeared on the screen and said, "Well howdy, I'm Cletus. Welcome to Heaven. Guess you did something good to get here, and good people deserve to give loved ones special blessin's!"
That was when they started to sing their jingle.
Does it make you want to cry?
When your loved one has to die?
Does it hurt you through and through?
When your face is turnin' blue'?
Well, luckily for you...
There's somethin' we can do!
We can help keep them alive,
So you can watch them thrive!
'Cause here at C.H.E...R.U.B.!
We'll save your honeybun from dying violently!
'Cause here at C.H.E...R.U.B.!
No, we never even ask, a fee!
Because good people spread the love!
And we're here for all above!
We do the paperwork for you!
And the heavy liftin', too!
So sit right back!
And let us bless a sooooooul for you!
Oh, we... are the C.H.E.R.U.B.!
When the commercial was done Blitzø blasted the tv to bits. "Nice one B." Millie praised.
"Gimme another, Mox!" Blitzø tells him.
Moxxie nervously sweeps away the flaming debris and puts another old fashioned TV onto the stand. He turns it on with a scared look on his face. The 666 News logo appears.
"Eh, nah. Not feelin' it. Next!" Blitzø tells him as he pours gunpowder into his flintlock gun. Moxxie switches the channel. A demonically dressed Betty Boop appears in black and white, dancing erotically with prominent breasts, holding a pitchfork. Blitzo and Millie look bored. Blitzø tells Moxxie to keep going.
Moxxie switches the channel again.
The imp that I saw in the Greed was on the television.
"I say, I say! Are you lookin' to get work making crazy contraptions and goofy gadgets? WELL, call me at Wacky Wally Wackford's Wacky Idea Factory! Where you make the things and I make the money! Please! I'm very desperate!"
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Helluva Job
FanfictionAaron never felt that he fit in at his home ring Lust. He got the unflattering title as the only imp in Lust to never get laid. And being an imp didn't help. That was when he was giving a chance at imp run assassination company by the name of I.M.P.
