2017
14 years old
"LAYAH!", my momma shouted out causing me to wake up with an instant headache. I don't know how many times she wants me to tell her that yelling is not to be done in the damn morning. I yelled back "I'm up ma", cause she gone keep yelling till I respond. I checked my clock that was on my bedside table and saw that it was 6:45 a.m.
I got up and went into my lil joined bathroom and did my hygiene routine, to go to this funky ass school. About an hour later I was done with everything, so I headed towards my brother's car so that he could take me to school.
--------
"How's school going?", my brother Isaiah asked. I replied with, "honestly speaking, I'm tired, I'm tired of the bullying, I'm tired of the teachers, I'm just fed up". I started breaking down, thinking about what I go through every single day. I always vent to my brother about my problems and vice versa. This morning was one of those days.
It was now 7:55 a.m. and my school starts at 8:30 a.m., so I still had some time, eventhough we still have like 25 minutes of driving to do. Isaiah pulled up to this spot that we always visit when we need to vent, that was on the way to my school. We got out the car and sat at the end of the cliff with our feet hanging off the end.
--------
It was now about 8:29 a.m. and I was heading to my first class, which happened to be English, the worst fucking teacher to exist is my English teacher.
Fight me.
--------
I was now in my last class which is Art, and also my favorite. I am working on this sculpture that I've been doing for about a week. It was close to dismissal so I cleaned up my space and packed up all my shit so that I could leave asap.
Literally as soon the bell rung, this busted up edges, fucked by the whole school vagina, badussy smelling, thotianna ass hoe, Shantel knocked my sculpture over. I was so mad I didn't even react, I just grabbed the sculpture and placed it back down on my desk. Imma just fix it tomorrow because I'm sure as hell not staying back.
I got and Uber to take me home and once I arrived, I spoke to my parents and had a lil talk with Isaiah bout random shit before I went to my room to do my homework.
Once I was done, I asked Isaiah to use his dirt bike and asked my parents if I could go to the cliff. They allowed but I had to make sure that my phone was charged and my location was on. I also had to let them know when I get there and when I was leaving.
--------
After about 15 minutes of riding, I got to the cliff. I stopped a way off from the cliff, cause I seen someone standing at the edge looking down. The road was empty, so it was real quiet and I heard faint cries coming from the person's direction.
I know this might sound dumb, but I decided to go over to them. I had one of Isaiah's guns with me and I said a quick prayer before heading over cause ion even play like that.
While I was walking to the cliff, I realise it was a male. He made about 4 steps back and was about to run off the cliff.
Out if instinct I yelled out. "NO! PLEASE DON'T JUMP, IT AIN'T WORTH IT!". I ran up to him and grabbed him cause I'm not tryna see him fall to a painful death. I pulled him back away from from cliff and stood directly in front of him.
I was looking looking dead in his face. He was fine asf and he looked like he was around 17 years old.
"You don't gotta tell me everything, but I'm listening", was all I said. We walked over to this lil bench that was near the cliff and started spilling everything to me.
"Mane....I don't wanna live no more. It's too much shit going on in my life and don't nobody care bro. My uncle killed my momma like a month ago and cause of that, my pops started drinking and smoking and spending all the money we have, which isn't even that much on drugs and shit.
When he come home, he be acting all aggressive and shit and be hitting my lil sisters, then when I say some bout it, he beat my ass. I'm talking bout, he fought be like I'm some random nigga on the street.
He don't even care how nobody else feel bout my momma death. My momma was my everything bro, she was the female version of me, she was the person I would tell all my fucking problems and not one time did she not listen.
She ALWAYS listen to me, even when it's complete bullshit. It's like the image of her dying body can't get outta my head and that shit eating me alive. Then there are these people that keep fucking with me just cause I told their hoe ass friend that I ain't wanna be inna relationship with her.
These grown ass niggas jumping me and taking my shit. What kinda dumbass shit is that. I just feel worthless. It's too much for me to take."
At this point he was in full blown tears as he continued to tell me his problems and I listened to everything he said. When he was done I just gave him a hug. It's like I could just tell that he was drained from all this shit and to be honest, I might've wanted to jump too.
No cap.
While I was hugging him I heard him whisper, "I just wanna see my momma and talk to her one last time."
I took in everything he said and I stated talking. "First of all you're not worthless. If you were worthless, you probably wouldn't even have air in you lungs right now. I know that I'm not gone ever understand what your going through, but I'll still give you my advice. I need you to see these as obstacles in your life to make you stronger.
I don't want to push all this to the back of your mind and try to 'forget about it' cause you won't. When your dad is not being violent, I want you to sit and talk to him, tell him how you feel about him drinking and stuff. You said that y'all don't have much money. I want to get a job, a legal one. Please don't get involved in the streets cause it ain't worth it.
I also want you to know that you could always talk your mom, because I just know that she is listening, no matter how far apart you guys are. You are loved, you might not see it but you are.
I know I'm a complete stranger and whatever, but the way you explained yourself tells me that you bottle up your emotions a lot. You're drowning in your own thoughts and you have a lot of anger in you. I don't know what else to say, but just go with the flow and prayer on it. I'll pray for you."
He gave me a weak smile before pulling me in for a hug. "Dekari". I responded with "I'm Keylayah". After speaking for a lil while, I found out he was 16 and he doesn't live close to here. We said our goodbyes and that was the last of Dekari.
--------
When I got home, it hit me that I forgot to ask for his number. I didn't plan on telling anyone about what happened today, cause it's simply not my business to tell.
It was getting late, so I did my night time routine, got in bed and watched 'Jane the Virgin' until I fell asleep.
