The Book of Plot Twists

A letter to Anastasia

Dear Anastasia,

I miss you. Oh god, I miss you. I miss your strawberry sweet scent. I miss your light brown freckles on the tip of your nose. I miss the sweet little kisses you gave me whenever I did something you liked. I miss how whenever I was away you would call out my name until I found you. I miss the simple yet delicious meals you made me everyday. I even miss you going out and buying me stupid outfits I didn't care for.

Where did you go? Please tell me. It feels like years since I've seen you! Why would you leave me? You always say that you love me. You always told me how adorable I was and how great you thought I was, so why did you leave? You just walked out the door and never came back. I'm sitting here crying and trying to beg you to open that door and come in again... but you haven't.

The couch is starting to lose your scent. The place where you would sleep is all neatly made up because you haven't been there in awhile. I tried to mess it up for you again, because I know how much you hate tidiness. I messed up the living room too. You hate it being so clean! Why is it so clean? Maybe if I throw around the cushions you'll come back. You always liked the davenport best when there were no pillows on it. Where are you?

I miss you, Anastasia. I miss how you ran your hands through my hair and gave me random massages for no reason. I miss that one time you painted my nails and how everyone thought it was the cutest thing ever. It was so silly, but I miss it. I'd let you do it again, Anastasia. If only you would come back.

You always leave me. And you always came back and said that you hate being away from me. Why do I feel like this time you're not coming back? Why do I feel like I'm never going to see you again? I'm so alone without you. So, so alone. You're my best friend. You're my only friend. And I love you. I love you more than I could ever tell you.

Why did you leave? Where did you go? Come back. I miss you.

I'm out of food and I can't cook, Anastasia. I can't figure out how to work the new water thing you bought. You always did this stuff for me. You always helped me. Now you're not here.

I'm probably going to die without you. I know that sounds a little extreme, but it's true. I can't imagine living without you.

And you've been gone so long.

Wait, I here a car. Is that your car? I'm going to go look out the window and pray that it is.

It wasn't your car. It was some old man. I was so angry and upset that it wasn't you that I started screaming at that car. I know he couldn't hear me, but I think I was trying to scream all of my emotions out of me. It didn't work, because I still miss you. I still want you. I still need you.

Is the door jiggling? No, it can't be you. You're never coming back. I accept the fact that you're not coming back.

It has to be an intruder. Someone is trying to break into the place that we used to share. They probably want to take all the things that you left here.

Well, I'm not going to let them. They're yours and no one can have them.

They're all I have left of you.

The doors opening. I'm going to jump them. I'm going to attack them before they attack me.

The foot steps in, and I go after them screaming like crazy.

"Oh my god! It's just me!"

I freeze. It is you. You've come back for me. You do love me.

I love you. You're so beautiful and you smell so nice and you came back to me.

I want to ask you where you've been. I want to tell you that I missed you and that I never want you to leave me again. The words don't come out, but I know that you'll read my mind. You always had a way of knowing exactly what I was thinking.

"Don't you remember? I was just going to a party with my cousin," you tell me.

I silently laugh at myself. Oh yeah, you were going to a party. Curse my short-term memory loss.

"It was crazy," you exclaim. "This girl had a problem with this other girl and we all forced her to tell us what was wrong and it turned out that she loved her!"

I want to tell you how crazy that is, but I can barely get a word out before you walk into the kitchen and start to make me dinner.

"I'm sorry I didn't come back earlier. I missed you," you say.

I run over to the kitchen to be with you. I just love your presence and you smell so good.

"Do you wanna go outside before we go to bed?" You ask.

I nod my head yes. I love going outside. It feels great out there.

We head outside and just chill out there for a few minutes when I realize that I have to use the bathroom. You see me and say that I can go ahead.

I walk over to the bushes and pee. When I'm done, I come back up to you and pat my head.

"Good, Max. You're such a good boy. Do you want a treat?"

I bark. Of course I want a treat.