For the Love of God

φ | twenty-two

I WALKED AIMLESSLY. My eyes were fixed on the horizon as my feet placed themselves one after the other like an automaton. While I appeared to be tranquil, my mind was a nest of noisy chaos. I couldn't even linger on one thought before another came bombarding in. Questions, doubts and regrets swarmed my mind. Should I have just let it go? Will I ever be able to live with myself if I did nothing and watched Ivan die all alone? Everytime that question came to my mind, the dreams Ivan had for his future popped up as well.

He was my best friend. I wouldn't let him die early or die lonely. I couldn't.

Wiping my tears, I decided there wasn't time to linger on what was already done. I had to pull this off. But every time I thought about it, I doubted if I had the power or the capability to rewrite the past, the legend. The enormity of the task swallowed me only after I had given my word.

The thought of failing to do so and losing everything I have, including Tyhi, haunted me. I couldn't bear to think about the consequences. I closed my eyes as the tears pricked like a thousand needles.

"Watch out," A man yelled and grabbed me by my wrist. Jolted back into reality, I opened my eyes and stared at a familiar face.

Zoyn.

I was introduced to him back when Lord Hephaestus returned. He was a handsome platinum-blonde, hard-muscled and well-tanned. His one good eye was golden brown and the other was shut with a leather eye-band. Viquen had told me that while working with metal, Zoyn's eye had taken a hit by a rogue spark which singed his optic fibres.

I pulled my hands out of his hold and tucked them behind my back. "You were going to hit the tree. Are you alright?" he asked.

I nodded, wiping my tears.

"Are you sure?"

Zoyn didn't believe me when I nodded yes. "I am heading to the mansion. Would you like to accompany me?"

I agreed. He slowed down to walk beside me, glancing at me with his eye once in a while. He didn't question me and I silently thanked him for it.

But during the walk, I realised I would have to betray Zoyn as well because he was Lord Hephaestus' assistant. He was too loyal to him to be taken to our side. I looked at him and wished I didn't have to do this. I wished I hadn't seen the future at all but at the same time I felt grateful that I did. My mind kept switching sides. I was a mess.

I don't know how but the next thing I was aware of was standing near the horse shed where Tyhi was meddling with the straps in the saddle. How did Zoyn know that I had wanted to see Tyhi? Was it obvious that we were close to each other?

As footsteps approached, Tyhi stood up and when he saw it was me, he rushed to my side, concerned. "What happened?"

He didn't care that Zoyn was there. He pulled me close to his chest. The worry on his face and the warmth of him made the mental wall burst into pieces, bringing a flood of tears. I sobbed against his chest.

"I found her in the woods. She almost walked into a tree and she wouldn't stop crying the whole journey back," Zoyn said.

Tyhi removed himself from me just enough to side-hug his friend. "Thank you."

He clapped Tyhi's shoulders in return and left.

Tyhi pulled me away from his chest to have a look at me but I refused to unwrap my arms. I needed him to hold me for a few more minutes.

"Mae, tell me what happened," he cooed into my ear. I sobbed noisily.

He guided me backwards and sat me on a pile of hay. He took his seat beside me and tucked me into his chest. "You know you are worrying me, don't you?"