Brotherhood

Chapter 29 - Answers

Author's Note: What are y'all's opinions on Shmi living vs dying? :P

~ Amina Gila

"Why do I have to learn this?" whines Boba, pouting as he sits on the couch, arms crossed grumpily. He looks so much like Anakin in this moment, that it's all Shmi can do to hide a smile.

"Because it's important," she explains gently. "If you don't have adequate language skills, it will be hard for you to survive on your own in a galaxy like this. Here, tell me what you don't understand." She leans closer to look at the datapad in his hands.

Ever since Dooku brought Boba here, Shmi has been raising and teaching him the way she would have had Anakin remained with her. She misses her son greatly, only seeing him on the occasions where Sidious has deemed his achievements great enough to get a reward. Shmi well knows the sort of things her son has been forced to do, but there's nothing she can do about it. She's one of the few who can keep him stable, and she doesn't want to take that away from him. She doesn't think she even can without putting the galaxy itself at risk.

There are many nights when she's too distressed to sleep. Anakin was – is, she won't lose faith in him – one of the best, kindest people she's ever known when he was a child. Sidious tortured it out of him, forcing him to commit heinous crimes that will forever burden her soul, and she's powerless to save her son. It hurts. It hurts far more deeply than anything she's ever known, even than being kidnapped from her family and sold into slavery.

This is her fault, her responsibility. She had only wanted what was best for Anakin, but she was wrong. The Jedi were meant to help her son. They didn't. Perhaps it would have been better if she'd stayed on Tatooine with Anakin. Even if they were slaves, they could have eventually gotten their freedom and left of their own accord. Because now, they're still slaves but this time, it's to someone who is cunning and manipulative. She doesn't stand a chance against him, and nothing she does will ever be enough.

She tried. Oh, she tried at first to protect Anakin. It only took her being electrocuted two times before she – and worse, Anakin – got the message. They had to play nice. They had to obey, to do whatever Sidious demanded of them no matter how badly it might hurt. Anakin has never confessed his crimes, but she's a mother, so she knew when he first killed someone. She'll never forget the look in his eyes when she saw him afterwards; he was only twelve.

"Did Anakin learn this?" Boba asks when Shmi finishes patiently helping him with his Rodian grammar. Being such a big galaxy with so many species and cultures, almost everyone learns at least one secondary language.

"Yes, he did," Shmi answers, smiling slightly. It's obvious to her that Boba respects Anakin as a surrogate brother and role model. As happy as she is to have the child with her, she fears for his future. She fears that he'll become nothing more than another bargaining chip for Sidious to use against Anakin. Dooku probably wouldn't have brought Boba here if he thought it might not be safe, but... she doesn't have the same confidence.

She respects Dooku, and while she does harbor some resentment against him for helping train Anakin to be a Sith, she knows that he's doing his best and he is fond of Anakin. If he wasn't, she probably would have done something incredibly risky to get Anakin away from Sidious.

At that moment, her comm beeps, and she moves out of the room to answer. It's Sidious. "Yes, my Lord?" she questions meekly.

"Senator Amidala has an interest in speaking with you about Lord Vader," the Sith Master informs her. She can't see his face – it's concealed by a hood – but she can see his smile of satisfaction. He wants this for some reason, and that fact makes her incredibly wary. "Answer her truthfully, but do not reveal our secrets. I would so hate to kill you." The comm call disconnects, leaving her shaken. She loathes communications with Sidious because they're so infrequent. He only speaks to her if he's planning something or threatening.