Romancing the Crone

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300 VIEWS THANKS YOU GUYS!!!

(At the Park)

Jessie: Hey, Darla, it's Jessie! Thank you so much that video of you cruising around Europe with your rich new boyfriend. If you consider a guy in his 60s "new."

Zuri: Don't get bitter. Keep it upbeat.

Jessie: So I thought I'd make a video for you about how awesome in the Big Apple. Look who it is. Bertram. He'sur butler. Our every whim. Bertram, say hi to Darla.

Bertram: Go away.

Jessie: New Yorkers may seem a little bit crusty, but once you get to know them, they can be the sweetest people in the world.

Chesterfield: Bessie! My Zeus is missing! Probably dog-napped by your revolting little delinquents!

Jessie: Please! My kids wouldn't go near that rat with hair extensions!

Zuri: I wouldn't bet on that.

Jessie: Uh-oh.

Maddie: Faster! Faster!

Jessie: Slower! Slower!

Chesterfield: Stop! Stop! !

Bertram: Excuse me! This dog is under-cooked and over-dressed.

Chesterfield: Zeusie! Oh! Are you all right? Oh, Bertram, how can I ever thank you for saving my precious little muchacho?

Jessie: I am so sorry! I was making a video back home...d Darla

Chesterfield: Marla, your friend is a horrible nanny. She couldn't take care of a bowl of sea monkeys!

Jessie: I'll have you know all my sea monkeys died of natural causes, and a thirsty cat.

(Screening room)

Luke: Ugh! I can't believe got two million hits.

Emma: And the kid who posted it won a free trip to Hollywood. 

Luke: Dad would be so proud a great viral video.

Maddie: He might even forget that to get a new skateboard.

Luke: Uh, yeah. It was a People's Choice Award. I had to beg that guy to take it.

Emma: Too bad we don't have a cool pet. Quiet, Mr. Kipling, we're trying to think!

Luke: That's it!

Emma: A lizard video!

Maddie: Not everyone has a lizard!

Ravi: A star is hatched!

(Outside the elevator)

Jessie: And welcome to my crib! Oh, yeah, you saw it right, Darla. An elevator straight into our living room! Front doors are so passe.

Zuri: Cut! You want to rub Darla's nose in it, right?

Jessie: Absolutely not! She's a dear friend. I just... Why, what do you got?

Zuri: We need to get you some bling. Mommy wore this at her wedding. Daddy bought it from someone named Tiffany.

Jessie: Whoa! If diamonds are a girl's best friend, this is Oprah and I'm Gayle. So. How do I look?

Zuri: Like a million bucks. Which I think is what Daddy paid for that tiara!

Jessie: Whoa! Do you know what that would buy back in Fort Hood? Fort Hood.

(Kitchen)

Luke: He's not doing anything.

Maddie: This is boring.

Jessie x oc insertWhere stories live. Discover now