Secret Admirers //one direction//

Chapter 46

Zayn gifts me a photo frame in which he has attached our selfie, which we clicked today. I thank him and he smiles opening up the window lighting his hand rolled  cigarette at least I thought it's a cigarette but after a closer examination I realise its weed. "You want some?" He offers and I don't hesitate, taking it from his hands. He doesn't pressure me, I could say no, but I didn't want to.

I feel like this is something I can share with him and bond over, so I take the chance. I pull in an almost cough. Zayn brings a lazy smile to his face, taking it back from me.

All of a sudden, Louis grabs my hand and pulls me towards the staircase in my house. We climb upstairs and sit on the stairs near my bedroom. Louis hands me a medium box wrapped in a blue paper with white snowflakes on it and a red ribbon on the top.

"Are you high?" Louis suspects, leaning in to look into my eyes. I start laughing, giving him an answer.

I start unwrapping the gift. I open the box. On the the top of the pile of things lays a picture in a frame the one which we took a while back when we were taking the trip to the coast. Me and Louis are on the picture. Louis is smiling like he never did before holding his phone ready to take the photo, and I am hesitantly joining in, a sweet smile playing on my lips, my hair all around my head being blown around by the wind.

I put it down to look at the rest. I see a headphone. He bought me a fucking headphone? Is he crazy? How did he even knew I want one, I never told him! It must've been pretty hard to find a gift I'd like. The next thing getting my attention is a CD.

"Is this-?"

"Yes, I made you a mix, don't laugh. It has all the cool songs we both like on it. It's not just Niall, who you can talk music to." Louis watches me carefully.

I am blown away. I also find a novel, a small painting of a beach and the sea on square canvas and something that looks like a handmade book. I carefully take it in my hands like it's a treasure I just found. I open the book and flip through it. It's filled with quotes and lyrics, pictures and memories. Our memories. There are photos I had no idea he took for example me eating pizza when we took the trip to the coast. There are other photos like me dancing? I don't even remember he was taking photos that time at the club. Then there's night sky full of stars, we were watching. Also photo of me laying on the sofa watching Netflix with him. I have to chuckle.

"It's a survival kit." He says softly. "It's a box full of small things to remind you that you are not alone." He speaks as I keep flipping through the book. I see photos of others, mostly Tracey and Niall, our little group. There are photos from the day we were skateboarding and riding bikes, from the day we ended up messing around in Niall's apartment instead of doing our assignments.

"This is.." I don't have words. I flip to another page, noticing the next ones are empty. I turn my head over to look at Louis and he gives me an explanation without me asking for it.

"They are empty so you can fill them with your memories. You can put anything you want, it's up to you. I left a lot of empty pages because you have a future, Perry. I know you think you don't. I know, if I would tell you this, you wouldn't believe me so I had to show you." He speaks slowly and I take in every word he says.

I get up and go into my bedroom, bringing my Polaroid camera. I point it at Louis, who is surprised for a second but he makes a funny face and pulls out his middle finger, just as I take the photo. I wait untill the photo comes out, then grab it and we both put our heads together to look at it.