First Love

Chapter 15

Chapter 15

I smile at the camera.

"One... two... three..." and the flash flickered.

It's our graduation picture day and end-of-the-school-year party at school, not to mention the outside the school graduation party that they have been planning for a month now that will be held in Subic.

I stood up and changed my outfit. The school ground is filled with decorations made by the Supreme Student Government of our school. I am the Secretary of the SSG so I am one of the students who helped them yesterday when they made the decorations. This week is really exhausting.

The SSG came up with the carnival concept. This party really meant a lot in our school because some students and teachers will leave and this is our way of 'despedida party' to them.

I was in the middle of walking to our classroom when I received a text from Mizuki that she's in the canteen. Kanina pa kasi siya tapos na nakuhanan ng litrato at sinabi kong mauna na siya dahil gutom na gutom na siya.

I caught her talking to our batchmate, Mia. But when she saw me she bid her goodbye and turned to me.

"Did your photo go well?"

"I didn't look at it." I answered.

Dapat ba tiningnan ko?

She giggled. "Hayaan mo na, maganda ka naman kahit anong anggulo,"

I ignored her. I ordered a veggie meal with soft drinks. Nakatingin lang si Mizuki sa kawalan habang kumakain ako dahil tapos naman na siya. I was about to drink my soft drink when someone took it from me.

"Dapat hindi ganito iniinom mo, Kirsten." naglagay siya sa tapat ko ng tubig at binuksan iyon. "Oh, inumin mo," he commanded. I awkwardly take it in Garry's hand and drink on it. He's from our batch, he confessed to me a month ago and I immediately turned him down because despite the fact that I am not ready yet, he's a bully.

I heard the tease of some students but Lorenz's shout really stood out despite our distance. "Andrei, galaw galaw! Nauunahan ka na, bugok!" I looked at them and I saw Andrei hit Lorenz's head and raised his middle finger.

After the library thing we never talked ever again, sometimes we would come across in the corridor and act like we never knew each other but some students were still gossiping about that rumor but Andrei didn't deny that or make that clear.

After I ate, inaya ko si Mizuki na pumunta sa locker dahil kukuhanin ko na ang mga gamit ko. She's telling me a story about this girl from our batch while we are on our way there. I nod my response when she's asking me about my opinion.

Binuksan ko ang locker ko at bigla na lang ako napaatras ng biglang gumuho 'yung mga laman. I crouched to see what it is dahil puro papel at nagulat ako ng puro love letter ang mga iyon.

"Ay, grabe talaga ang haba ng buhok mo, sis!" Mizuki shouted and made the other student look at us.

I tightly close my eyes.

Anong gagawin ko ngayon sa mga ito?

Things pass by so fast and it's already our graduation day.

I wore a black long sleeve fitted bodycon dress underneath the white toga and black high heels. I looked at us three in the mirror. Ate Nina and Ate Nira we're trying their best in my hair and makeup. I already ate my breakfast and Dad apologized because Mom will not be attending the Grad and Dad wasn't even sure if he will be there.

And... I understand.

Or trying to understand even if I can't.

"Lucuesta, Kirsten Abigail." the emcee called.

Instead of being happy that I succeeded in my speech earlier because I am the valedictorian, I felt numb. Mom and Dad didn't make it. So I walked to the stage with Ate Nira by my side and Ate Nina taking pictures of us below the stage.

"Congratulations, Kirsten. Always remember that, Me and Ate Nina are so proud of you, hmm?" she whispered, teary eyed.

I smiled even though I wanted to cry.

Mom and Dad didn't even bother to congratulate me.

I don't want to break down on my graduation day.

I should be happy that Ate Nina and Ate Nira are there for me.

The Graduation runs smoothly, they're happy and I'm not. I looked at the Grade 12 students and Grade 10 students hugging each other, bidding their goodbye's to each other. Mizuki is hugging me and that's the only thing that is making me feel better right now.

"I know, we're still gonna be in the same school next year but I just want to hug you, that's it." she explained and I laughed. "I love you, babe." she added.

"I love you," I replied.

After that drama session I excuse myself that I'm just gonna use a bathroom at sabi naman ni Mizuki na pupuntahan lang daw niya 'yung mga kaklase namin. I retouch after I pee and immediately go back to the venue. I received a text from Ate Nira that they will just wait outside and take my time here.

I was about to sit on my seat when there's a bouquet of fresh red roses above it and there's a letter. 'to: Kirsten' is written in front of the letter so I am sure that It was for me. I was about to open the letter when they called me for a picture, so I've decided that I will just gonna read that later.

I was on my way home when I decided to read it.

Dear Kirsten,

I'd never imagined that I would do this ever in my life but life is so unpredictable. I don't know if I will give this to you but if I did then I guess this is it?

First of all, I really want to congratulate you and If no one has told you yet, I'm so proud of you, remember that. I don't know when and where exactly I first saw you but I just found myself one day, admiring you from afar. It's weird because I haven't even met you yet.

I also want to apologize if you're getting uncomfortable sa mga sinasabi ng iba. Hindi ko talaga alam kung bakit kumalat na may gusto ako sa'yo, sadyang malikot lang talaga ang bunganga ni Lorenz.

I write this to totally forget what I was feeling. Hindi ko maamin sa iba na gusto kita dahil ayokong makarating sa'yo at ayoko rin naman na i-deny iyon dahil gusto naman talaga kita. I know that you're not ready yet and I respect that so I'm hoping that once I write this letter this feeling will fade. I know, this is corny as hell but my sister pushed me to do it dahil wala naman daw mawawala at aalis na rin naman daw ako.

I just wished you to be whatever you wanted to be and I hope Mizuki is taking care of you, dahil duda talaga ako sa babaeng 'yon, just kidding. And always smile, Kirsten, because you're totally beautiful when you smile.

Shit, that's corny.

But, thank you for being my inspiration.

Again. Congratulations, Kirsten!

- Andrei