I'll tell you in 30 years

14 - Bitches!

The more I drink, the more I think, the angrier I became.

Did you still have me in your heart? I really don't think so. If you love someone, and that someone said that want to break up with you, wouldn't you beg? Even if you wanted to be with her so badly, at least, ask me a few more questions first or ask if you can do something to make things better? Nope, the only thing you asked me, would I be happier? You bloody idiot, how can I be happier without you? How could I be better?

All the years we been together, never once, not even once, we spoke about the future. Not even once, you mentioned the word "forever". No promises, nothing.

You knew I was unhappy, why didn't you do something about it? Instead, you chose a bitch over me! What is so fucking good about her? What does she have to offer, beside a pretty face and perky breast?

I was so pissed off, that I squashed the beer can, throwing to dustbin and nearly hitting Bubbles. She whimpered away. And I went to carry her, to my lap.

"Bubbles, you are the only good bitch in the world! All the rest are pure bad bitches. If you have a man, don't trust that man. He will say I take care of you, then expect you to take care of yourself. Don't trust any man, you hear, no man can be trusted!"

She just looked at me, with her big goldfish eyes, judgmentally, and continued lying on my lap.

Our first oversea trip was to Italy. He just completed his final internship, and I had a break between my jobs. It was his birthday and I wanted to surprise him with a trip to his dream country.

Jun has always been a historical bluff. Our first stop was Milan. It was raining cats and dogs. Everyone in our tour group was tired and miserable, but Jun and I, couldn't stop giggling under the umbrella. You see, under the rain, it was perfectly okay for him to wrap his hand on my shoulder and stick close to me. No one would raise an eyebrow.

Taking the train ride to Cinque Terre and getting into the wrong train. Cinque Terre was utterly gorgeous. Houses and shops, built along the rugged, steep hill, facing the raging sea. Having our warm pizza and coffee (I truly believed Italians have the best coffee and water in the world) on the pathway, entering the small stores.

The most memorable, must be the visit to Vatican. Jun's face became so sombre as we were entering St Peter Basilica. He stood in front of Michelangelo sculpture for a long time, just looking at it, wasn't even aware that  other tourists were jostling around him. He turned around, searching for me, squeezed my hands and whispered thank you.

That night, as we were lying on the bed, he asked me, what other countries on my bucket list. He wants to earn enough money, so that one day, he would bring me to all the countries, in my list. I told him, Japan.

"I thought you been to Japan before?"

"Yes, I did. But I didn't get the chance to spend a night in Mount Fuji. And never with you. So, I really want to go to Japan with you."

"Saqua, then, why didn't you book Japan, instead? Wouldn't it be cheaper?", enveloping me tighter. "Because this trip is for you." He just lowered his head and gave me a kiss on my forehead. "One day, one day, I will bring you there."

When, he told me that he had one week break, I was so excited. I booked the flight tickets and the hotel. Imagine, waking up in Jun's arm, on Mount Fuji, breathing in the fresh mountain air, visiting the Fujiyoshida Sengen shrine in the 5th station and having hot chocolates as we look out at the peak.

I thought traveling to Japan, would give us the opportunity to sit down and talk, to reconnect back, to remind ourselves, what brought us so far, and what will bring us further.

Then he called.

With just one call, I lost my boyfriend and my monies that I had paid for the trip. And because all the bookings were done digitally, I didn't even have the pleasure of tearing the tickets...damn him.

You bastard, you are such a liar. Pay me back, for the ten years I spent with you, the peak of my life, and I wasted it on you.

"You hear me, Bubbles, never believe in any man. They will say, they bring you to Japan, but in the end, he is fucking that bitch!"

Bubbles, obviously, didn't find me amusing, just jumped down and ran off.

Bitch, all the bitches are the same!

Next day, I was woken up, violently, by a very pissed YBY.