The Stella I Remember

41| Most Importantly

I leaned back against the bench and just watched the many different people come and go through the double doors of the hospital. When it was obvious that Elliot needed some time alone with Marcus, I decided I needed some fresh air for myself. I came out here and found this bench near the entrance. 

I haven't moved since.

This whole thing with Abby and the baby was really getting to me. Even though I've only known Marcus and Abby for a short time, I felt closer to them than my own family. Was that fucked up of me to think? I guess I felt like Abby and Marcus knew the 'real' Stella. Yes, my parents knew the real me from before the accident, but they lied to my face about it. They tried to change me and make me into the daughter they wanted and not the daughter they had. 

Abby, Marcus, and Elliot didn't lie to me about anything. The welcomed me for who I was and that made me feel...I guess home was the best word for it. I felt comfortable around them. I didn't feel comfortable around my mom or my now ex-fiancée. And when I stepped into my apartment in New York? It felt like I was in a stranger's home. 

I couldn't feel like that anymore. I needed to find a place where I could finally be myself. A place where I could be comfortable and feel loved. That place was with Elliot. I should feel nervous about moving in with him when we only just reconnected. Surprisingly, when the idea came to me I felt nothing but excitement and hope. It felt right. And he lit up when I asked him. 

He wanted it just as much as I did. 

When my phone buzzed in my hand I answered it without looking at the name, worried it was Elliot with news. 

"Elliot? Hello?" 

"Stella? It's your mother." 

Shit. "Mom, I can't talk right now."

I did not have the strength to deal with her and her lies right now. Or my dad who has also been radio silent. All of my concentration and energy needed to go into praying that Abby and her baby made it through this. And Marcus. God he had looked so destroyed in that room. It cut me deep to see him like that. 

"I know you left the city, Stella," she said softly. "Are you running from us again?"

"No, mom. There was an emergency with a friend." 

Because Abby was a friend of mine. A very good friend that I couldn't afford to lose. 

There was a rustling sound on the other end of the line. "Well I won't keep you," she said. "I just wanted to apologize again, Stella. I'm sorry for what we did. We were wrong."

A part of me was surprised by her apology. She sounded sincere. But the other part of me knew she would probably say anything not to lose me. 

"I appreciate that, mom. I still need some time. This isn't something that I can just get over." I brushed my hair back when it blew in my face. "Mom, give me a few days and I'll give you a call and we can talk about this. Okay?" 

"Okay, Stella. I hope everything is okay with your friend." 

"Thanks." 

I hung up the phone and sat it on the bench next to me. At least she was making an effort; whether it was fake or not. But that was something I needed to deal with after I found out Abby, the baby, and Marcus were all right. 

"Hey, baby." 

My head whipped in the direction of Elliot's voice. I got to my feet as soon as I saw him step through those double doors. "Is there news? Is she okay? The baby?" 

He held up his hands as he approached me. "Slow down, baby. No news yet. I just needed to hold you for a minute." 

He pulled me into his arms and I took the opportunity to breathe him in. The tenseness started to leave my body as I inhaled the dark earthy sent of him. He always smelled so good. It was why I liked sleeping in his shirts so much.