Chance

Chapter 7 - Gets Harder The More That You Know

Sylver Allynsha Armstrong

I walked upstairs to my room and straight to the bathroom. I barely heard Stella call for me.

I turned the hot water knob and popped in the shower whilst fully clothed.

As the water washed me, I recollected the events of the night. I hung my head, maybe in shame.

Why was I dragging this boy in my mess? Why was I bring him down with me?

As the water washed away the remnants of who I was, I decided to be somebody else. Sylver 2.0, if you will. Adam Brown was the best thing that happened to me in a while. After my mother leaving, after the mental abuse I suffered from my step father, after the fakeness from everybody in school, Adam Brown was the light at the end of the tunnel.

When I kissed him tonight, I felt different. I felt like I wanted to not be mean and pathetic. It felt like I should be at least try to break free. I wasn't a great person. I wasn't even a good person. I used people and felt indifferent about it. I treated people like shit. I cheated on people. I betrayed people. In short, I was a first class asshole. To everyone. Everyone besides my mother. And now Adam Brown came along and changed that.

It's not like he made me want to change. He changed me.

When I kissed him, I didn't see fireworks. I didn't see eternal happiness. When I kissed him and felt him smile, I saw us old and grey and withered, on a porch, drinking tea and just glad to be in each other's company. When I kissed him, I saw a future. I saw myself ten-twenty years from now. I saw myself, with him.

I turned the shower off and popped out. I took off my drenched clothes and looked at myself in the mirror. My makeup had stained my face. My hair looked terrible. My body was tanned but filled with several pimples here and there. I was a physical mess. The only thing that was contradicting with the way I looked, was the fact that I was smiling. I was properly smiling to myself after ages. He put a lousy smile on my face. Could I be anymore cliche?

I washed my face and dried my hair. I changed into a tshirt and wore some underwear and decided to see if Adam Brown was awake to Skype me. I really couldn't get enough of him.

I dialed him number. It went to voice mail the first time. I tried again. He picked up on the fourth ring.

"Hey, everything alright?" he asked. His voice sounded like hot chocolate on a winter's afternoon, lingered with a hint of anger. "I'm alright. You sound a little tensed," I said.

"Well, Sylver. For me, it's not all rainbows and sunshine. Now, why did you call?" he spat. I was a little taken aback by his reply. This was the same man who took me out for a Green Day concert tonight and let me kiss him everywhere on the way back. What could've happened in the past forty five minutes that made him speak like this?

"I'm sorry, Adam Brown. Is this a bad time?" I said. I heard him take a deep breath. I was clearly testing his patience. "Tell me what you want, Sylver," he said trying to calm his voice down. "Adam Brown, if you're not too busy, would you like to video call me?" I said. I had to take the chance. I could practically picture him losing his patience with me. "Goodnight, Sylver." he said and hung up before I could say anything.

I felt like I was being a little clingy. I kept my phone on the nightstand and lay on my bed. I looked at the ceiling and recollected tonight's events once again. I remembered how his skin felt on my lips. I remembered how he held me when I bit his neck. I remembered how he silently sang along to A Tragedy Of Love Loss and noticed me notice him. When I closed my eyes, all I could see was his face when he kissed me at the concert. He kissed me like it was the last night we would spent together. He kissed me like he was saving my life. He was.

I almost fell asleep. I was woken up by a sound from my laptop. I sat up and picked my laptop up from the floor. I was getting a Skype call. From Adam Brown. I hit accept.

I quickly switched on the lamp on my nightstand and ran my fingers through my hair in a desperate attempt to control it. "Hey," I said. He looked at me and smiled. "I'm sorry about earlier. I walked into my mum's room," he said looking away in shame. I laughed. "Was it gross?" I said with a smile.

He looked at me. His eyes darkened. "Sylver, I walked in on my mum while she was in bed with another woman," he said. My jaws dropped. Adam Brown's mother was gay?

"Your mum is getting more chill by the minute," I said. She was though. She was a pretty cool lady. "Are you kidding? It's embarrassing. How come she never told me? I feel like I've lived a lie," he said.

"It's her life, Adam Brown. It's harder for her than it is for you. What did you say when you opened the door?" I said.

"I was all, "Mom, what in the name--" and she was all, "Adam wait!" as she tried to put on robe. Her girlfriend hid under the sheets," he said disgusted. "Adam Brown, you have to be sensitive about this situation," I said with a stern voice.

"You don't get it, Sylver. Forget it," he said dismissively. "I wanted to tell you that you're great and I had a lovely time tonight. You're pretty fun if you ignore the arrogance and all that hair," he said with a smirk. "If you were here, I'd hit you, jackass," I said with a sarcastic smile. "Thank god, then," he said sticking his tongue out at me.

I loved Adam Brown.

How did this happen?

His pixelated face looked so pure. I wish I could kiss him again at that moment. "Can I tell you a secret?" I asked. "Yeah, go ahead," he said sitting up. "I know it's so soon but I've learnt to count my blessings and take my chances," I said. He seemed to be listening intently.

"You're a blessing, Adam Brown." I said. "You're my favourite blessing," I said.

He looked down and smiled. "Sylver," he said.

"You're my pole star, Adam Brown. You are," I said.

He looked away and smiled. His smile seemed different. It was a pleasant smile. It was his secret smile. The one he only used around me. It was his smile for me.

"You're beautiful, Sylver. I'm lucky I got to know you," he said.

I smiled. "We have school. I'll see you tomorrow," I said yawning. I was tired. My watch read 3:15 am. "Can I take you out for lunch tomorrow?" he said. "Sure," I said grinning. It didn't matter if anybody saw us. We'll take different cars. I was a lucky girl. That moment proved it.

"Bye then," he said. " 'Night." I said. He smiled. I disconnected the call.

And then it hit me.

Adam Brown and I hadn't known each other like we do now until a month ago. But our mothers were friends since they were teenagers.

They claimed to have an ugly fight when we were children, after Adam Brown's father's passing. But my mother was still his mother's financial rock.

They had a secret lonely island where they used to go as teenagers and only they knew of this place. They went to this place before my mother left. They went on their last getaway. My mother never loved her husbands. Adam Brown's mother never remarried.

Adam Brown's mother never cries, as they say, But she seemed to be extremely in mourning at my mother's funeral. My mother wanted her to be my legal guardian. My mother wanted to divorce my stepfather because she wanted to get married before she died. She wanted to get married to...

It seemed absurd but I felt stupid to not have put the pieces together before. But finally the puzzle was taking shape. It all made perfect sense now.

My mother and Adam Brown's mother weren't best friends. They were repressed homosexuals.

My mother and Adam Brown's mother were lovers.

∆∆

Bet you weren't expecting that to happen.

Hold on tight for the rest. A LOT is left to be unfolded.

-whynotcake