Lady Stardust

27. Summer 1976

CW: Dark thoughts, abuse, just a very dark chapter

Summer 1976

Ariene sat on her bed, numb, staring out the window. She blinked and sighed, still staring out to the sea. She was wearing a pair of designer blue jeans and her The Aftermath T-shirt, a white long sleeve shirt under it. She got up. I fucking hate it here. She passed the pile of letters on her desk. Unopened. Ariene walked out to the balcony and stood over the ledge, looking down at the sand. She slammed her fist on the ledge before turning back to her room as a knock came at the door.

"Ariene," Her sister said, in her perfect French accent.

"Yes?"

"Let me in."

"No." Ariene said. She laid down on the floor, the record player next to her. The door opened.

"Ugh, are you wearing non-magique clothes again?"

"Why does it matter to you?" Ariene snapped.

"Pick yourself up. Dinner is at 8." Ariene rolled her eyes. A bunch of fucking dementors. Ariene sighed and turned to the door. Her sister, Louise, stood tall in the doorway. She had a straight black bob and green eyes, the same pale skin Ariene had, but without the litter of freckles, and a much snobbier, feminine look.

"Fuck you," Ariene said, making direct eye contact.

"You better get rid of that shit around your eyes. Mom hates that." Louise said, switching to a harsh French. Ariene threw up two fingers out of reflex and her sister laughed coldly.

"So bloody british," Her sister said, mocking a British accent before walking out and Ariene clenched her teeth in anger. Ariene walked up to the mirror, her eyes glistening with fury as she took the eyeliner off and changed. She caught sight of her empty collarbone, the beautiful tattoo she had gotten at Christmas now removed without a trace of existence.

***

Ariene ran up to her room, slamming the door. She wiped her tears away furiously as she fought to catch her breath and threw her wand at the wall. Bowie ran from it, terrified. Fuck. Ariene picked her cat up and pet him. She picked her wand up as well. It looked fine, but for some reason that angered Ariene more. She looked out to the sea, to the balcony. She knew the curse, she knew what she could do. It was two words and she'd be gone. It seemed almost too easy. Ariene had these thoughts quite often these days. She could simply end it. What the hell would that say about her, though? What about Bowie? Ariene looked at her cat. It was simply an intrusive thought, right? Ariene shook it away and walked to her dresser and reached under all the clothes.  She pulled her last box of cigarettes out and struck a match instead of using wandless magic. She stared at the flame for a second as more intrusive thoughts flooded her brain. No.She held the match to her cigarette and lit up. She looked away as she exhaled lots of smoke and caught sight of the stack of letters on her desk. Don't even think about it.

***

The next few weeks were worse. Her sisters relentlessly mocked her, her dad screamed at her, her mom watched the chaos with an ugly smirk. Ariene had more of these "intrusive thoughts" and continued ignoring the pile of letters that was getting bigger. She had run out of cigarettes, she had run out of whiskey. She knew she had to leave. It was an impossible task and she didn't dare attempt it. Her mother had destroyed her record player, her sisters had destroyed the records, and Ariene had tried her best to stay numb about it all.. Ariene spent her time tattooing ugly words into her thighs with a hexed quill. It was painful, but it was what she needed. She went with it. She had two more weeks of this before Hogwarts. She had two more weeks. Ariene continued telling herself this, trying to calm herself down. It felt like she would be stuck there forever, miserable house-elves giving her pitiful looks as they cooked, portraits insulting her relentlessly, sisters laughing at her with disgust. Ariene had two more weeks before Hogwarts. Two more weeks.

***

"Ariene, we just want what's best for you," Her mother said, the same awful smirk.

"Like hell you do," Ariene said. They were standing around the dining room after a nasty fight about blood purity. Truly awful stuff, and Ariene didn't hesitate to share her opinions on the matter.

"Ariene, you need to grow up and accept that you are part of this family."

"Believe me, I've accepted it." Ariene spat at her father. Her sisters laughed cynically.

"You are a Genet, it's time you start acting like it." Her mother said, raising her wand. Ariene paled. No. Not again. Her mother saw her frightened expression and lowered her wand, a horrendous grin on her face.

Ariene looked at her sisters. They weren't laughing anymore, were they? She straightened her posture again and tried her best to keep the tears away. Ariene gave her sisters one last look before walking back to her room, leaving the silence behind her. Deep down she was terrified. She closed the door softly, trembling terribly. Ariene looked at her cat. Bowie was okay. Bowie was fine. She began to pack her stuff, still shaking, trying not to think about the dinner. Trying to distract herself. Once everything was packed Ariene stared at her trunk, empty and numb. Ariene kicked her desk and the letters fell to the ground. She needed to do something to take her mind off of everything. She turned around, looking for something to do, when she caught sight of her reflection. Yes. She picked up her wand and walked to the mirror, carefully pointing at her hair.

"Candefacio."