WITH AND WITHOUT YOU. heeseung ✓

TWELVE

　

THERE is usually an air of comfort and warmth being radiated from the other side of the bed when Heeseung wakes up.

However, for this one morning that he opened his eyes from his slumber, there was none.

Only a prickly cold sensation that nipped both at his skin and his mind.

Once he regained enough consciousness, Heeseung turned around to observe the sudden cold that grow on his opposite side, only for his eyes to widen at the empty space and the clean sheets that were almost untouched.

It was like Eunseo didn't sleep on the same bed as he did.

Ruffling his hair, he got out of bed, walked over to his dresser to retrieve his robe before leaving the warmth of the room to look for his missing fiancee. She's got to be in the kitchen like she normally does during the morning.

But if she was, then why does it feels like something's terribly off with the start of his day? Why does Heeseung feels like there's something going wrong?

Ignoring the heavy pulse in his chest, Heeseung proceeded to go in the kitchen.

Only to end up growing worried seeing no traces of Eunseo in the space she normally occupies. There was no sight of any cooked morning breakfast either.

Something is definitely wrong.

Growing irritated and worried, Heeseung went back upstairs to his office, almost smashing the door open to the empty room. He ran his eyes all over his space; there was still no Eunseo to be found.

Heeseung already thought of going back to his room to fetch his phone and to ring his in-laws if they knew where his fiancee was. He thought she might’ve left the house without him knowing and it was eating him away from the worry that brew in his stomach.

However, before he could even close the door to his office shut, something caught his eyes from his work desk.

He curiously approached the things, only to stop on his steps midway seeing the familiar box resting atop his table with two paper envelopes, crisp and white.

Heeseung sat on his swivel chair first, licking his lips in anxiety as he took the box in his palm.

He already had a feeling where this was going, but he wasn't ready to accept it just easily.

Without a second thought, Heeseung popped the lid open, and what greeted his sight inside the box made fresh tears well up in his eyes.

It was Eunseo’s engagement ring.

The one he bought and customized just for her.

It was there, settled nicely on the box as if it has never been taken out of it in the very first place.

With shaky hands, Heeseung opened the smaller envelope next, seeing a neatly folded paper inside.

It was a letter. A farewell letter for him to be exact.

Eyes blurred with unshed tears, Heeseung rubbed them away before running his gaze over the familiar neat handwriting of Eunseo.

The paper was dried up in some spots. It was obvious that the woman was crying while she was writing it for him.

And that, hurt even him even more.

　
　
　
　

ㅡ

Dear Hee,

As you can see, I have returned your engagement ring. I felt as though I was not the right person to wear it, I know I was not the person to wear it. I have unconsciously given you a second chance to redeem yourself, for I have known about your infidelity and your mistress whom you've taken for a nice dinner out in the city while you told me that you were gonna go drinking with your friends. I was hoping that you'd confess, tell me about your unfaithfulness and maybe... just maybe I'd forgive you. I was foolish for even considering that when in reality, I was not sure if everything will be the same if I had given you a second chance. You knew how I felt about cheating Hee, and I trusted you enough that you would never do that to me. I abhor people like my Dad and that was the last thing that I held over you because I trusted you. I did. So much and that was the fault in my part. Was I that not enough for you to seek interest in another woman all the while I waited for you to come home with the cold dinner that I've cooked for you? Was I that unlovable for you to seek love from someone who probably didn't even know that well like I do? Were you growing tired? Of me? Of what we had? Because if you were you could have told me directly instead of hopping on the decisions that you made because that just hurt me even more. Ha, you weren't probably even thinking of me while you were with her, no? Thank you for everything you've done for me, Heeseung. Thank you for helping me break down the shell that I used to conceal myself from the world because of my fear of love and commitment but I can't thank you for being the sole reason that once again, I am now second guessing everything yet again. I wish you all the best Heeseung, you did taught me not to hold grudges to deeply because people makes mistakes. But perhaps this mistake of yours will forever be engraved in my mind just like the memories of us that are now tainted. I wish you all the best, thank you.

- Bae Eunseo

ㅡ

　
　
　
　

Heeseung opened the other card, pulling a printed photo out of the container only for a small sob to leave his lips.

It was a photo of him and Minju, holding each other's hand on the table top during their dinner.

And on the back, another note was written.

‘I asked you if you cheated because I already knew. I was testing your love for me Heeseung, it was obvious that it wasn't enough; it wasn't enough for you to come forth with your wrongdoings. You chose to lie, and that lie was my last thread to drive myself away. Thank you for everything but this year.

– ES.’