Love With Abandon

Judge's House

The next week passed in a blur; rehearsing, memorizing, rehearsing, getting the background arrangement, rehearsing. It was exhausting, and I would often find myself collapsed in front of my laptop, my background music still going on.

I haven't left my car a whole week, aside from doing my neccisities in the bushes nearby. Come to think about it, I don't remember eating in a long time...but that was probably the result of the stress.

But now, it was time to sing in front of Taylor, going against the other, hard-faced girls. For the first time, I was truly nervous. I started trembling uncontrollably, my heart was was beating fast, and I was having trouble breathing.

When I am normally in front of a crowd, I was normally intimidated, by the vastness, by all the people able to judge you. Judge's house was the level that I had to start doing interviews, where everyone knew who I was, if only for a while. In a few months at most, my family and "friends" would know were I was, and that terrified me.

I was honestly terrified of the interviews. My whole life was a secret right now. Simple questions like, "How's your family?", or ,"Do you have a job?", were things I couldn't answer without ruining my reputation, without changing my future.

But I had to do this. I had to remind my self why, why I had to do this. To show the world I am not a useless creature, to show them that I matter. To find my sister, and to lose my job as a stripper. To rid myself of the nightmare life I was living only a few months ago.

***

The small waiting room was tingling with energy and nerves. Girls were fumbling around, listening to their music, their eyes closed to hold back the panic that, unfornutately for them, showed through every pore in their booTo be honest, I was plenty frightened, for the first time on this show. I was sure I was twitching more than the other girls there. I was trembling all over, and my knees were knocking into eachother, looking for the other's comfort. The waiting room was nothing like on television; I was now sure that those discussions were rehearsed. The contestants weren't looking at eachother as friends would, and definitely not of admiration. They were more looks of envy and hatred. I had a feeling I wouldn't get along with them at all.

Peeking out the window, I saw Taylor with Zac Efron sitting on a lush, green lawn overlooking rolling hills far out in the distance. They seemed to be discussing something. Taylor then got up and entered the door to the house.

"Angelica Hastings, please follow me," a man in a red shirt and a white visor said.

I sat up from the plump, comfy couch, and followed the man out of the room and into a new one. It was furnished similarly, with the same couches and same wallpaper, but the air had a more calm feeling as opposed the aggrivated, claustrophobic feeling the other one had.

Looking around the room, I saw Taylor patiently waiting for me.

"Hey, Angelica."

"Hi," I replied, suddenly feeling nervous.

"So, I'm here to give you advice before you perform for me. You are a great singer, and a great writer, but what you need to work on J's your stage prescense. You have great vocals, you are able to incorporate so much emotion into the song, but it sometimes feels like you're just singing for yourself. Remember to open up to the audience, make them feel like they are in the song, rather than just an onlooker. You have expressed your concerns to me of charisma and bravery, and honestly, that takes a lot of time to build. These are just a few pointers. Good luck."