From Then Till Now: A Jamaican Love Story Book 1

Chapter 20

Shanya's POV

Sunday 3:00 PM

My mom has me laughing like crazy, telling me how a church sister supposedly got in spirit and used that as an excuse to slap another church sister that she doesn't like.

Mummy doesn't know that I was in the hospital. Leah told her that I was on my period and moody since that's how I normally am, so it didn't send off warning bells when she didn't hear from me for three days.

She would worry and I don't want her to. We talk long on the phone about nothing important and her voice brings me peace.

When she finally ends the call, the sadness engulfs me, I slide under the covers and start to cry.

My spirit is sad, it's out of sync with Alex's and I don't know how to stop feeling this way.

Alex brought me home from the hospital Thursday afternoon. We barely spoke since all I wanted to do was sleep.

I slept most of Thursday and Friday waking up every few hours to Leah feeding me something. She literally had me sitting up and she fed me, soup, porridge and at one point yogurt.

She blames herself for not forcing me to eat so she's making sure that I eat.

Alex has been coming over and helping me in the shower. He doesn't seem to care that I'm on me period. Thursday when I got home, he undressed me and removed my tampon before I could stop him.

Every other time I've asked for a minute alone to remove it before he helps me in the shower. I'm not comfortable with him doing that for me.

When helping me in the shower he's gentle but his touch is that of a caregiver and not as my man. I was still a little weak, so I appreciated his help.

I felt bad about it, but I guess we're at the end of the road and he's just ensuring that I'm ok before making it official.

He slept beside me on Thursday and Friday night, we didn't speak much, and he didn't touch me.

He left early Saturday, Leah was here with me the entire day. He didn't come back, so Leah slept with me. I was strong enough to take my own showers, so she only stayed in the bathroom and talked to me while I showered.

I haven't seen or heard from him since Saturday morning, and I can't help but feel hurt. He cheated on me and he's acting like I did him wrong.

I fall asleep thinking that I'm going to make the breakup official.

****

I wake to the sound of my bedroom door opening, I open my eyes and see Alex entering my room and closing the door.

He looks tired and sad. He walks over to the bed, removes his gun and places it in the bedside drawer. He walks into the bathroom and after a few minutes I hear the shower running.

He exits the bathroom and walks into my closet. He comes out wearing shorts and a T-shirt.

Alex now has clothes here as I do at his place.

He's as sexy as ever and looking at his bare legs is turning me on.

He climbs into the bed still not saying anything to me and I turn my back losing the will to break up with him.

I feel movement on the bed as he comes up behind me, and pulls me to his chest. He kisses my neck "Please stop crying Shanya." he says.

I move my hand to touch my cheek and I realise that I'm indeed crying.

"Babe this has been the worst week of my life and knowing that I'm the one causing you all this pain is only making it harder." He tells me.

"Shanya, I never cheated and I'm a little disappointed that you would think that. From we got together, I've never slept with another woman. The person behind the fake page is Trinity, we had a three-month arrangement that went on a little bit longer than stipulated. She wanted more and I didn't so I broke it off." He shares.