Swim Away (Mermaid)

Chapter Thirty-Two

Weeks passed by, and Noah didn't show up. The first week, I didn't think too much of it because sometimes those mermaid meetings were long. By the second week, the worry set in. I kept it to myself. I was good at hiding my feelings. But by the third week, people could tell I wasn't okay.

Not only did I worry about Noah, but my tail and powers hadn't returned. Asher, who only visited a few times a week had no idea about it. He only came to make sure I was alright. I knew he wanted answers, but I didn't want to inform him of anything yet.

That also didn't last very long. There were mornings where I slept in and would wake up from a nightmare. It always involved something happening to Noah.

I went downstairs after waking up from another nightmare. And with each one they made me feel worse. It added on to the negative thoughts and feelings that I had. It was hard to focus on reality when I was so lost in my mind.

I didn't even notice Asher leaning against the kitchen counter. Only when he spoke I jumped back to reality. I really did jump. He scared me.

He only watched me. I hated it when he did that.

I knew why he did that. He was waiting for me to say what was wrong. I could tell by the way he looked at me. This made him the opposite of Noah, who would try to get me to tell him what was wrong. I knew it was because Noah cared. I did hate it, but I was starting to miss it.

I also didn't like seeing Asher here.

Noah would always be here as if he lived here.

Even though Asher wasn't here as much, it still felt like he was replacing Noah.

I figured that once a protector, always a protector. Asher being here and watching over me proved that, even though I wasn't his mermaid. That was upsetting. It seemed like a curse. Stuck with the feeling of always having to protect someone.

I grabbed a bowl and poured some cereal for me.

Asher's eyes never left me once. "Can you stop?" I said, annoyed.

He didn't say anything again.

"Okay, just say something then. Anything? I'm getting sick of this, Asher!"

"So am I," he replied.

"You're not my protector. Noah is. I want you to leave. Just leave!" I brought my hand out and focused at the door. Nothing happened, though. For some reason I completely forgot I didn't have my powers. I did get used to not using them, but that moment felt weird.

Asher grabbed my wrist. "Your powers. They haven't returned. Why didn't you say anything?" He pulled my arm out of his hold.

He completely ignored what I said. "I can't do this anymore," I whispered. It pained me to wait, having no information on Noah. My powers that haven't returned worried me as well. I know I wanted them gone, but knowing that I actually lost magic meant something was wrong. Really wrong.

I wanted Asher gone. Him being here made me more nervous and worried than normal. I couldn't help but feel this way.

"You know what this means, don't you?" I shook my head at him, backing away. "Your powers are going to return, but whether they are pure or dark is something I don't know."

"Wasn't the whole storm thing supposed to determine that?" I asked, knowing that was the stupid test.

"Yes and no."

"I remember everything, just not the part where I passed out." If only I knew.

"I took you back home. The storm continued to rage on and It was out of control. But then it faded away. I haven't heard of a story like this one, Lara. There's a change here and I'm not sure I like it." He paused. "I waited for you to tell me everything. But you kept it to yourself. I know I'm not your protector, so I didn't say much. But this is serious. I never thought you'd keep it inside you."

"I-" I didn't know what to say.

"I'm going to do something I haven't done in a long time," he sighed. "I'm going to go visit the mermaid leaders. I don't know if they'll see me, but it's worth a shot. I'm going to let Noah know what happened and hopefully he'll be returning soon." Asher really meant what he said.

"Asher." This made me happy, but at the same time it didn't. I didn't like the merpeople. They keep specific mermaids out of their group. And Noah hasn't returned. What if they did something to him? What if they did something to Asher?

Asher put his hand on my shoulder, which made me look at him. "Everything will be fine," he said. That was the last thing he said to me before he left to find the merpeople and hopefully bring Noah home.

Another week passed by. Asher didn't return.

Everyone I saw could tell I wasn't feeling like myself. My dad knew what was going on, but there wasn't much he could do anyway. But having him around was a little helpful.

I even tried to spend a little time with Ariel and Selena. It helped keep my mind off of everything else for a bit. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get away. There were moments where I couldn't take it anymore and almost broke down in tears.

Even though I had people around me, it felt like no one was really there, like I was going through everything on my own. And honestly, I really was.

Asher said that he had never heard about my situation before. That meant no other mermaid before me went through what I was going through. Mainly about my powers and apparently my survival compared to the other two half dark mermaids.

I didn't have a clue on whether I was now fully light or fully dark. I felt exactly as I did before.

Was I going to stay this way forever?

Could I go back to the way I lived my life before?

I wanted to say that I liked the idea, but it felt wrong.

Everything just felt wrong.

I heard someone knocking on the door. I set aside the book I was reading and opened it. Behind it stood Asher and my heart started beating fast. Was Noah with him? What happened?

When I looked at his face I could tell that whatever happened didn't go so well. He didn't hide it from me. I liked that, even though it pained me to know I was going to receive bad news.

I took a few steps back, and he walked inside, shutting the door behind him. Asher went straight to the couch, facing the floor.

"What happened?" I asked, so I could find out why Noah wasn't with him. I wasn't looking forward to what he had to say, but it had to be said. I had to know.

I could already feel my heart breaking.

"Lara..."

"Just tell me!" I knew he was going to stall and I didn't have the patience for that.

He kept his hands clenched together, still not facing me. His hair covered part of his face and the sadness in his voice worried me more. I kept my own hands in a fist to keep them from shaking. I could already picture the worst and I didn't like it.

"I talked to them. I was a bit shocked that they let me meet with them." He said, almost in a whisper.

"Asher, please tell me."

Another part of me didn't want to know. That I should just continue the way I was. But I had to start accepting the truth. I knew in the past I wasn't ready to hear about my mermaid self and the journal, but it was time to move past that version of myself. I had to be strong enough to handle what was coming my way.

"Fine, but you're not going to like what you hear."