Hiding behind Rainbows 🌈

Lights up

Hi welcome to lights up , in this chapter we find out what Really happen in Dallas in 2012 !!!
Smut warnings!! If you don't feel comfortable reading this then don't.
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"How are you feeling tonight Portland " I yell
" do you know who you are Portland " I love asking this question
"I said do you know who you are"
The screams flood  the arena, as I make way over to the microphone to sing the first line.
" what do you mean"
"I'm sorry about the way"
"Sing it" I yell
My ear are flooded with the most incredible sound!!
" Never coming back down" the crowd sing .
" can't you see"
" I could but wouldn't stay"
" again" I yell raising my arms, wanting them to sing louder"
" Wouldn't put it like that"   fantastic!!!
As I walk over to the far side of the stage, I look up and my eyes are meet with a stream of rainbow lights Coming from the top level of the arena.
I catch my breath for a moment at the beautiful sight that is before my eyes.
My fans are truly amazing to be able to organise something like this, I put my arms up waving and give a little bow acknowledging what they have done for me.
This song was one of the first songs that I wrote for the album, the first song that I released, for me it represent so much.
It's a song about acceptance and loving yourself for who you are , it's about self discovery and coming into your own person .
It's about the freedom that can be found in being open and vulnerable , as well as the fear that goes into stepping out into the light.
I would love to think this is my coming out song, in my head it is.
I have been told by management if any interviewers ask me any questions about the song I am to say I don't know what the song is about, That I just wrote what came into my head.
Which I know  is ridiculous , as I wrote the song and know exactly what it is about.
I had to fight so hard to get the song to be released on National coming out day. I am not allowed to reveal my true self so I put all my feelings into this song.
I remember when I was a guest on Capital breakfast show , I had to do a face time video first thing in the morning.
I was wearing my fluffy lilac dressing gown, my favourite one that Lou had gave me.
When they asked me about lights up I decided to go against managements request and decided to say a few words .
"Lights up for me is about freedom"
"Its about self reflection, and self discovery and just like freedom"
"Its feels like, very free to me, a couple of things that I thought about and I guess wrestle with a little bit over the last couple of years"
" it's kind of like just accepting all of those things, it's a very positive song to me,
Its very uplifting, and liberating"
For me As a young person starting out in the music Industry , when I was yet to discover who I really was, trying to figure out who I Wanted to be ,  but having that choice taken away from you , was truly Heartbreaking .
I look through the crowd and My eyes catch a glimmer of a fan dresses in a red, blue and white striped shirt, with denim jeans, I had to look twice  , As He is dressed just like Lou was in Dallas all those years ago.
I give him a Hi and a wave acknowledging him smiling, He Obviously went to a lot of effort to wear what he had and I know he is obviously a Larry .
Oh the images that this evokes, I can feel my checks getting hot as a blush creeps up my face , Dallas , Lou absolutely wrecked me in Dallas , I feel my cock responding to the images in My head, I subtly try to readjusted myself hoping no one notices.
We  headed to Dallas , technically Frisco , in 2012 were we were doing a special show and a promo, bring 1D to the US.
At this stage in our relationship Lou and I were inseparable , we couldn't keep our hands off each other , constantly joined at the hips, clinging to each other all day.
Before our interview we were going to perform a few songs for the fans , we were placed in a stage on the baseball field.
We performed "up all night", "more than this" " one thing" and " what makes you beautiful" The crowd was incredible, clapping, Jumping hollering and singing so loud.
Through out our performance wherever I move Lou  would follow me , he kept brushing up against my body occasionally setting it on fire. 
After the performance we were interviewed before we did a meet and greet for our fans.
The interview starts off with  the usual questions, about one direction, Liam thanked all  our fans for all of their support.
We were talking about the different gifts the we receive from our fans,   when suddenly I see Lou lean behind my back and I feel his teeth nipping at the back of my shirt , Liam  shoots Me a look , knowing that management won't be happy , I Shrug my shoulders , not knowing what Louis was really doing . 
The Interviewer moves onto the question about a bromance between Niall and Liam and Me and Louis .
I immediately put my hand on Lou's leg patting it , wanting to keep a connection between us.
" they generally think that we're in a relationship" Lou said referring to me and Him, I know he hates saying it , that's it's just a part of  our script  we have to play, but all the denials of our relationship hurt.
Liam said "you are though" quietly but not enough.
As The interview finishes I feel Lou's  hands slip under my shirt which sent shivers down my spine.
We were now allowed to have a short break until the meet and greet .
I was feeling so frustrated as Lou would not stop whispering filthy things in my ear, about what he wanted to do to me , and my god was it hot .
Lou was insatiable since we started having sex, he was constantly dragging me off somewhere, it was like the height of the honeymoon period.
After  the interview were walking over to baseball club house , Lou's hands were all over me , by then I've had enough , Lou Was trying to get under my skin all morning, the things he was whispering in my ear were bringing me undone.
When we went into the baseball club house , I looked at Lou.
"Come with me" I said to him walking backwards using my finger to Gesture him to follow.
I passed a empty room , and dragged Lou in shutting and locking the door.
I was feeling pissed off and desperate , and only Lou could help me out.
Lou smirked at me "what can I do for you Harold"
"Well for starters you can stop whispering things in my ear all day, I have had enough , what are you trying to achieve" I yell raising my voice at him.
" Well Harold , I believe I got what I was trying to achieve"
"And what was that" I said still a bit pissed Off.
" to get you all hot and flustered so I could do this" before I could even think Lou slams his lips into mine, and pushes me up against the wall, it Wasn't a simple kiss but one with full of desperation.
Lou's hands immediately  grab my bum squeezing it , then his hands  start pulling at my shirt and going to unbutton  my pants, I pull back gasping . " Lou stop" I say Breathlessly "were can't do this here, we don't have time"
Lou gives me a smirk.
"oh yes Harold we can, if we are quick" His lips attached to my neck, in that special place he always likes to suck , which he calls my sweet spot, a moan escapes my mouth, and I know I am to far gone for any reasoning.
Lou pushes himself between my legs and I can feel his Erection touching mine .
Lou makes quick work of my pants pulling them down around my ankles.
He brings 2 fingers to my mouth " suck" he said as I take his fingers in my mouth, rolling my tongue around them , Lou pulls them out dripping with my saliva.
Lou crashes his lips back against mine as his finger Slowly circle my hole, my stomach is swirling in anticipation of what's was to come next .
My breath catches in my throat as his fingers push into me , " so good for me baby" Lou whispers into my ear.
oh god , I was so gone, as his finger Thrust in and out of my hole.
My mind was a mess as I gave into the incredible feeling rising inside me.
"I need more , I am ready please Lou" I say
Lou removes his fingers as My legs turn to jelly as the tip of his cock slides in waiting for me to adjust.
"You are so tight baby" Lou whispers into my ear.
"Move" I yell frustrated.
"Ok love calm down "
I grap Lou's hips trying to make him move faster .
" oh Lou" I moan as he starts thrusting ,  I move around trying to adjust myself , to find that special spot .
"Yes that's it" I say as Lou hits my prostate repeatedly, over and over again, bringing me undone, If he wasn't holding me up I would definitely fall to the floor.
"Oh yeah ....right there I'm close Lou, don't stop" .
Lou hits that spot one more time before I come with a scream, Lou following closely after.
"Wow" is all I can say, my mind feels Foggy, as I tried to take in just what happened.
" yep sure was, that was so hot" Lou said removing himself from me.
" are you ok love" Lou said stroking my face
"More then ok" I stay smirking back at him.
Suddenly we hear Niall yelling and banging on the door.
" Lou, Harry Are you guys in there, come on we have to get to the signing and meet and greet".
We quickly pull our clothes back up and walk over to the door .
Upon opening it Niall looks at Harry.
" you so just had sex didn't you" He said laughing
" you two are unbelievable can't you keep it in your pants" Niall said
"Niall I would have you know , we did no such thing, Harry and I were just talking" Lou Response to Niall accusation.
" well mate have a look in the mirror, Harry looks so wrecked" he said pointing to one close by.
I turn to the mirror, My eyes Are glassy , my lips are swollen,  my curls are messy,  my cheeks are flushed a bright red , Oh my god , It was a true giveaway.
I turn to Lou  and whack him on the chest, " I can't go out there looking like this"
" oh come on Harold , calm down, no one will notice"
Niall snort with laughter " yeah right"
Liam suddenly yells "lads we need to go"
Lou walks over to Liam " what are you smiling about, Lou you look very flushed" Liam said taking Notice of Lou's appearance.
" look at Harry , Guess what they were up to" Niall chimes in.
" oh My god are you two serious, can't you control yourself just for a bit" Liam saids.
Zayn walk over joining us.
" Why does Harry look like he just had his brains fucked Out"
" because he did " Lou said smirking proud of his achievements .
"  seriously look at him, management going to be so pissed" Liam said walking in the direction of were the meet and greet was going to take place.
"you two need to stop doing this shit, it is going to cause us heaps of problems, management watch our ever move, you know that"Liam said with his voice full on annoyance.
"Yes Dad" Louis saids to Liam
" shut up tommo, Let's go do this"
As we walk in they have tables set Up for us to sit at , I move in to sit next to Lou when I hear a noise from the side , I glance up to see someone from management shaking their head , telling me I am not allowed to sit their.
I feel a deep sadness in my heart as I move down to sit between Zayn and Niall , I take a deep breath in and put a smile on my face ready to meet the screaming fans yelling  at us from ever direction.
This started becoming a habit of ours, we loved to sneak off , finding places we could be together, it was like an addiction, The thrill of maybe getting caught, so many different places over so many different times, is something we crave.
I am pulled away from these insatiable memories back to the Arena to stand in front of this incredible sight is truly overwhelming.