jokes part 1

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Q: When do you kick a midget in the balls? A: When he is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice
Q: What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute? A: Your job still sucks!

Q: What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree? A: Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!

Q: How does a woman scare a gynecologist? A: By becoming a ventriloquist!

Q: What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women wild? A: a $100 bill!

Q: Whats long and hard and has cum in it? A: a cucumber

Q: How do you kill a circus clown? A: Go for the juggler!

Q: Did you hear about the guy who died of a Viagra overdose? A: They couldn't close his casket.

Q: Who was the worlds first carpenter? A: Eve, because she made Adams banana stand

Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come (cum) in a bottle? A: Because his wife died!

Q: What do you call a cheap circumcision? A: a rip off Girl: "Hey, what's up?

" Boy: "If I tell you, will you sit on it?" Q: How do you get a nun pregnant? A: Dress her up as an alter boy.

Q: Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? A: They steal all the green cards.


Q: What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A: At least a zit waits until you’re a teenager before it cums on your face!

Q: What does it mean when your boyfriend is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A: You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Boy: "Want to hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, its too long." Girl: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Never mind, you won't get it."

Q: How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck ? A: When you pull her pants down her ass is still in them

Q: What do you call 2 guys fighting over a slut? A: Tug-of-whore.

Q: If the world is a Jacket where do poor people live? A: In the hood. 

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