♥𝒽𝑜𝓂𝑒 ♥ {𝓜𝓲𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓮𝓵 𝓒𝓵𝓲𝓯𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓭}

lets talk baby..

he looks so cute in that photo :(
*************************************************
Livs pov:

i woke up at 10:00 a.m. with michaels arms wrapped around me, i smiled to myself but it faded when pictures of him on top of jessica flooded my mind. i teared up. i still love him, and i love being in his arms, he just hurt me so bad...
maybe i should talk to calum about this, i thought to myself. i carefully pulled his arms off me and put a pillow in my place so he wouldnt wake up. i grabbed one of my shirts from my bag and a pair of shorts, throwing my hair into a messy bun. i was too lazy to get ready for the day. i pulled on a pair of socks and grabbed my birkenstocks, tiptoeing out of the hotel room and shutting the door as quietly as i could. i slid on my birkenstocks and walked to calums room.

once i arrived in front of his door i figured i should text to see if hes awake, so i pulled out my phone and clicked on his name.

me: hey cal, are you up?

there was no answer for about 3 minutes, i stood leaning against his door waiting for an answer.
finally he texted back

colomn: hey liv, yeah im up. are you alright? i never saw you last night since the thing.. wait where the hell did you sleep?!

me: um.. yeah im good, i think. and at first i fell asleep in the hallway because i didnt wanna bug you and i didnt wanna sleep in the room with michael. but he found me in the hall around 2 am and carried me into our room and then woke me up to see if i was okay

column: LIV WHAT THE FUCK!! you arent gonna bug me for needing a place to sleep! but i guess its good that michael didnt just leave you in the hall. and what do you mean you think you're good? whats the matter?

me: um do you think we can talk? im outside your door

he read the message and a few seconds later opened his door, as i walked in he asked if i was okay. i just shrugged. i didnt know what to do about michael, and i obviously have feelings for calum too but i dont want that to complicate our friendship.

"Liv whats wrong? talk to me love"
i picked at the skin on my thumbs and stared at the ground, staying silent. he stepped closer and put his hands on my waist. my heart started beating faster as the heat from his body radiated off him.

i looked up at him, "i-i dont know what to do cal.." i whispered, there was a lump in my throat and i was holding back tears. he raised an eyebrow "about what hun?" i sighed "everything. michael, you, jess, me. i just dont know"

he wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly, "lets talk about michael first yeah?"

i slowly nodded, "alright.. come on lets sit down. you want somethin' to drink? ive got tea, beer, although i suppose its too early for alcohol. erm, i have wine as well, orange juice, water, and milk. thats it i think"

"um.. ill take a water" i mumbled, i wasnt feeling like myself. there was so much going through my head
"i got you, go sit in the recliner" he said, pulling away from the hug and turning to the kitchen. i sat down in the recliner, leaning my head back against it and shutting my eyes. breathing in deeply, trying to calm myself down. he came back and handed me my water, sitting on the coffee table in front of me.

"alright.. therapist calpal to the rescue. what are your emotions when you think of him, without thinking about him with... her?" he asked, i thought for a couple seconds

"happy, i think of his smile and it makes my heart so warm and i feel complete"

he nodded "mmk, how do you feel when you think about him with her?"

i answered immediately as my body was filled with anger and sadness "sad, and angry that he would be with my best friend. but then i think about her and how he told me that he was drunk and she forced herself on him and took advantage of him, which i believe. because when he told me he didnt have the look he has when he's lying to get out of a situation. im mainly mad at her for taking advantage of him. he didnt cheat, we were broken up still. we still are... she just... she knows how much i love him and she still took advantage of him. its a bitch move." he nodded again "you arent really upset with mike not anymore at least, just her. for taking advantage of him when he was vulnerable and intoxicated." i nodded "yeah.. yeah i think so. i could be with him still. i know he wouldnt hurt me that way again."

"you need to talk to him about your relationship"

"okay... but first, can we talk about us..?" i asked, nervously playing with the hem of my shirt. his eyes widened slightly and he looked away for a second, cleared his throat, then looked back at me. "erm, yeah 'course" i raised an eyebrow, "you seem uncomfortable cal. we dont have to, if you dont feel comfortable talking about it." he scrunched his eyebrows together and shook his head slightly "no liv, we can talk about it. i.. i think we need to, if im being honest. so.. lets talk baby"

"yeah.. um, okay.. i felt something different... like a spark or something? but i dont really know what to do..." he nodded "liv..." he stayed silent for a moment, looking at the ground with his hands folded in front of him. he blinked harshly for a second and looked up at me. he had a blank expression, "....i didnt feel anything" he was chewing on the inside of his cheek, he was lying. but i knew why. he doesnt want to hurt michael, its his best friend
i dont know why but i was slightly hurt at the same time.
"oh" i said "okay.. it didnt seem like that last night. but i may be crazy, i probably didnt feel anything at all, i was upset. i bet if i kissed luke or ashton id be saying the same thing" i half-heartedly laughed and stood up from the recliner. he half smiled up at me with sad eyes. "im gonna go.. was a nice chat cal. thanks for your help" i sighed and started walking towards the door. i heard him stand up but i didnt turn around. tears were threatening to spill out, why was i so upset? hes my best friend... and i love michael. my hand was on the door knob but his hand grabbed my wrist and spun me around, pulling me into his chest. i tried not to look at him so he didnt see the tears in my eyes, so i just stared down at his chest. "look at me." he said in a low, dominant voice.
"i dont want to." i replied, but the tone he just used honestly made it hard to not look at him. he brought his hand under my chin and forced my head up so i was looking at him. his once calm face now had eyebrows scrunched together and his eyes were flickering between my eyes, he saw the tears i was holding back, and i could tell it hurt him to see it.

he whispered "liv i- did i-" i assumed he was asking if he caused the tears to come to my eyes. "no." he looked at me, "youre lying... livvy im sorry. i- i didnt mean to" he rested his forehead against mine "i lied... i felt the same thing... i just- i didnt want to tell you because i dont want to take you from michael..."

i nodded and sighed, "i get it. but... i think you already have cal..."

*************************************************

OK IM SORRY ITS SO SHORT BUT IM CLIFFHANGERING YOU BECAUSE LIKE SHSHSHS THIS IS GOOD AND I ALSO WANNA SLEEP AND ALSO LIKE DONT WANNA FORGET EVERYTHING I WAS GUNNA DO BY SLEEPING BUT I DONT WANNA WAIT TIL 8 AM TO SLEEP SO LIKE HAHA CLIFFHANGER AND I PROMISE ILL DO ANOTHER CHAPTER TOMORROW AND ITLL BE LONGER AND AH