BETTER TOGETHER [18+] ✔️

Part 15

We are finally heading back to Virginia. Emily still hasn't said a word to any of us. I tried to comfort her after Hotch told me everything. We just ended up yelling at each other. I'm hurting the same way she is but she doesn't understand that.

She's curled up in her seat, arms wrapped around her knees as she leans against the window looking at the sky. The sun was setting as we made our way out of Washington State. I was next to her on my laptop, her only way out was to talk to me.

We were the only ones still up, the rest of the cabin was silent. We had took up the secluded seats away from everyone. "Em.." I tried softly. "Please talk to me.." I saw her wipe her face.

"I'm sorry... I didn't know... I swear. It's okay to hate me, it's okay to leave me." She cried quietly, her shoulders shaking.

"No baby no, I don't hate you. Don't apologize, it was not your fault. I love you so much, we can try again later down the road." She wouldn't stop crying so I turned her and pushed her head into my lap. Her hand fisted my shirt as she continued to cry, the days finally catching up.

"I lost our baby Jennifer! I was suppose to take care of it.. Our first child.. I lost it.." I had tears running down my face as I ran my fingers through her hair.

"It's okay baby. The only person I blame is the unsub, get some sleep okay?" She nodded her head and closed her eyes. I continued running my fingers through her hair until we both fell asleep.

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I ran Emily a hot bath once we finally made it home. We got straight in the car after getting off the plane, Hotch gave her a 3 week vacation as did my boss.

"Just relax in here okay baby? I'm gonna go make us something to eat really quick" she nodded and closed the door after I left. I sighed and went downstairs. I picked up my phone and found Garcia's number.

"Hello, Penelope Garcia speaking"

"Hey Garcia, it's JJ."

"Hey my favorite swat person, how's it going?"

"Hey, I want to do something for Emily, is there anything she ever wanted to do? Like a trip out of the country or anything... I want to make her feel better but it feels like nothing I'm doing is helping..." I walked over to the big window we have and looked out of it staring at the lake.

"Well, she has always wanted to go to Paris. She's never been out of the United States before, it's been a dream of hers"

"Can you do me a huge favor and find the earliest flight to Paris? And maybe a nice place for us to stay? I'll send you my bank info."

"Of course my blue eyed beauty. Go take care of our girl for now" I smiled softly. Leave it to her to make me smile.

"Thank you Garcia" I hung up the phone and got started on a meal for us. I made a simple pasta dinner with a salad. As I was making our plates Emily came down in a pair of my sweats and an oversized hoodie.

"Hi baby"

"Hi.." she sat down at the island as I placed a plate in front of her. "Thank you"

"You're welcome, how are you feeling?" I stood on the other side of the island watching as she pushed her food around. She shrugged.

"Okay I guess.." I sigh quietly and eat my food. My eyes flickering back and forth between her and the plate.

"Can you please eat a few bites, you didn't eat at all at the hospital."

"I'm not really hungry.."

"Okay that's fine." I grabbed her plate and wrapped it up. "Go upstairs and lay down, I'll be there in a little bit" I walked around the island and kissed her head. "I love you Emily Prentiss, please don't forget that."

"I know.." she got up and went upstairs while I cleaned up the kitchen then went around making sure the doors were locked and the blinds were shut.

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I know I shouldn't be giving Jennifer the cold shoulder right now, I need her more than ever. I feel so disgusted with myself, how could I let my child die. I had a feeling that I was pregnant but I never took the test. Maybe if I would've my baby would still be here..

I climb into bed once I make it upstairs, I curl into myself on my side of the bed. I can hear Jennifer moving around downstairs. I finally hear her come up 10 minutes later. She turns the lights out and crawls into bed. She doesn't pull me into her arms like she usually does. I know she hates me..

"I'm sorry.." I say. I know it won't help. "I know you hate me because I hate me too. How could I have not known I was pregnant, I should know how my body changes.. It's my fault." tears streamed down my face as my body shook.

"I don't hate you Emily. I don't blame you, most women don't know they're pregnant until they're at least a month. It wasn't our time baby, we don't need a baby right now. We have each other. I love you so much Emily." She scoots over to me and pulls me into her arms. I turned and buried my face in her neck holding her tight to me.

"Please don't leave me.."

"I'll never leave you Emily... I swear." We held each other close, our legs tangled up as we fell asleep. I had dreams about your baby. It would've been a girl I bet. She would've looked like Jennifer. I knew I was crying in my sleep because Jennifer held me tighter.

We will be okay soon. Time will heal.