Survivors guilt

Chapter two

"My big brother gets into a plane crash, and I don't have the right to see him?" Amelia jokes.

"I am happy to see you Amy but just shocked. How have you been?" Derek asked, wanting to avoid the subject of the crash.

"Just saving lives, taking names, how have the both of you been?" She asked, sitting down on the couch.

"Dealing with life and Maddie. The last time I talked to Addie, she said you were dating someone," Derek did a partial smile, he didn't know how to react. He sat down, opposite of his sister.

"I'm just going to go check on Maddie so you two can talk," Meredith quickly slipped up the stairs.

"Why do you still talk to Addison?" Amelia questioned.

"Your avoiding," He observed, she changed positions as she seemed uncomfortable.

"So are you, I didn't come here to talk about James or Addie. I want to talk about my big brother and see how he's doing," She watched his eyes as they squinted. She couldn't tell him the real reason why she was here, not yet.

"Ah, so his name is James, have you talked to ma or anyone else?" Derek continued to avoid the main question. He knew his sister was hiding something, she always was.

"I talked to mom a few months ago when your accident first happened. Kathleen or Nancy hasn't spoken to me in at least five years, Lizzie and I text sometimes," Amelia remembered the exchange she had with Lizzie just the previous day. Everyone wanted to know why Derek hadn't tried to fix his hand.

"Ah, well good to know. Now what is the real reason why you are here," he didn't want to tip toe around the subject anymore.

"Why haven't you got your hand fixed," She got straight to it, she wasn't leaving until she got the truthful answer.

"We've tried everything," He looked down at his hand, the scars the lined his hand and wrist. The pain was there but he had gotten used to it, occasionally taking aspirin if it hurt too much.

"What is everything?" She didn't want to believe it, but it seems he had given up to easily which was nothing like him.

"Tried surgery, didn't help, Physical therapy help a little, but I will never regain full function, it's impossible," he flexed his hand, noticing the twitch when he releases the fist he made.

"What about a nerve allograft, to replace the damaged nerves with healthy new ones," She asked, going over the research she did in her head. She needed to be prepared, she knew her brother and he was not one to give up.

"There are no matches and I'm not asking for nerves from any one of you," He looked into Amelia's eyes. She had that determined look in them, one only she got when she truly believed in something.

"I can't donate nerve, but I'm sure maybe Lizzie or Kathleen would. From what I heard, Nance is still pissed you married the slutty intern, not that Meredith is slutty," she quickly corrected herself. She enjoyed Meredith, the few times they met she never really interfered or tried to get to know every personal detail about her.

"No Amelia, don't go telling Liz or anyone that there is a possibility that they could help me because I'm fine with this, I've accepted this," He was adamant about her not telling anyone.

"Derek, come on," Amelia begged.

"No Amy, now that's final." He stood his ground; she groaned as this was getting her nowhere.

Meredith stood at the top of the stairs, listening in on the whole conversation that went on between them. Amelia was right, he should get this fixed because he's unhappy like this. He always pretended to be fine, but she knew him, he loved surgery almost as much as he loved her and their daughter. She walked down the stairs, just as the argument was coming to an end.