i always wanna die sometimes [jaewoo]

eight

A/N: semi-long chapter ahead, don't worry the end is near hehe only 2 or 3 chapter left ^^

after cooking all of them shared and enjoyed a wonderful dinner, jungwoo volunteered to wash the dishes since jaehyun cooked for them. aera played in the living room while jaehyun is watching television. after jungwoo finished washing the dishes he joined the two at the living room and sat down beside jaehyun, after a while when aera became bored playing with some of her toys she crawled her way into jungwoo's lap and laid there.

"jungwoo-hyung can i lay here for a while, i got bored playing i wanna watch some and play on my ipad"

"sure aera, lay here" 

jungwoo tapped his lap indicating that aera can lay there, he placed a pillow beside it and aera laid, she was watching some kid shows on her ipad while jaehyun and jungwoo was watching some television. after a while it started to get late in the evening, jungwoo yawned indicating that he's feeling a bit sleepy, she glanced over aera to check up on her, he noticed that aera fell asleep while watching so he gently removed the ipad from her hands careful not to wake the little girl up. he looked over jaehyun who's eyes are very droopy, he signalled over to say that aera fell asleep. 

"she fell asleep in my arms"

"ok, i'll just carry her" 

jaehyun carefully carried aera in his arms hoping he wouldn't wake up the little girl who's sleeping soundly. he placed her in the bed and tucked her in gently, he went to the living room again to watch more television not until jungwoo stopped him in his tracks.

"i know you're tired jae, go get some sleep i'll finish it up here"

"you sure you don't need help?!"

"i'm sure plus i saw your eyes getting all droopy, aera need someone to sleep beside her i'm sure she'll wake up if she found out that she doesn't have someone beside her" 

"ok woo, thank you! goodnight!"

"goodnight too, jae!" 

jaehyun went back to the guest room and closed the door he sure need some goodnight's sleep, on the other hand, jungwoo was left all alone in the living room. he is indeed sleepy but there's something that's been bothering him and he just can't seem to fall asleep so he stayed there in the living room to watch a movie. when morning came he was seen by jaehyun who was the first to wake up, jungwoo was fast asleep and he seemed to left the television on. jaehyun switched off the television and cleaned the table that jungwoo left while he was watching last night. jaehyun also made breakfast for them, the aroma of the bacon and egg that was coming from the kitchen woke up jungwoo, he quickly went to the kitchen to see who's cooking. there he saw jaehyun wearing an apron with his white t-shirt and jogging pants cooking some savory bacon and eggs for breakfast along with some orange juice. it's a sight everyone wants to see every morning when they wake up. 

"you're awake, you left the tv on last night"

"yeah, i forgot i was watching a movie then i fell asleep"

"care to have breakfast with me?!"

"sure, i bet this taste delicious, even from the smell i can tell" 

they both sat down at the table and ate the breakfast jaehyun made, it was indeed delicious.  it was quiet at first until jungwoo spoke. 

"so, you feeling good now?!"

"so far, yeah i think i'm feeling a bit great, and even now that aera is with me, you do know how aera is the only one who's keeping from going on with life. i also have you, you had helped me so much jungwoo and i don't know how can i thank you for all of this, you made me realized so much about life" 

what jaehyun had said somehow warmed jungwoo's heart, it was the first time someone had said that thing to him and he knows deep down that jaehyun is a great man living in a drastic life that he doesn't even deserve, and with that, he can't help but feel sympathy towards the former because he had also experienced that same exact thing although, during his case he became helpless.  he can feel that the end was near for him so he gathered all of his strength and courage to do all of the things he wanted to do before it's too late. 

"when i'm gone promise me one thing jae, i need you to take good care of your little sister and also your life because not all people are lucky enough to live life to the fullest because one day you'll be gone in this life and you will regret every single opportunity that you've wasted that came along wishing you should've grabbed or seize it"

jaehyun was somehow taken aback by jungwoo's words, it kinda sounds like jungwoo was saying his last words and it sent shivers down his spine. jungwoo was a happy-go-lucky, optimistic person and a bright one too, never in his life would he imagine jungwoo talking to him like this. 

"what are you saying!?, are you sick? "

"no i'm not and i'm not also dying, i'm just saying this in advance because who knows"

"stop that you're scaring me"

"don't be, it's natural for a person to say his last words because in that way you will know how sincere and meaningful those words are coming from that person" 

with that jungwoo excused himself to go to the bathroom, there he broke down to tears covering his mouth with his hands hoping that jae wouldn't hear him. it's time and he was not yet ready, never was and he never knew that time will come that he will soon leave this earth with a heartbreak. he finally fulfilled his mission and duty and now it's time for him to come back. he doesn't want to of course since he had met someone who was not as strong as him but is a very good and down-to-earth person, whom he had felt like he's once again home though not in someone else's arms but in someone else's presence. after years of longing finally, he had found it but the timing was really bad in his case, he was just there for a short time and he knew he had to go back whether he likes it or not. another thing that he doesn't like is that after he was gone, he will just remain as a memory for the both of them.