its faded...

welcome

    Say, when you love someone, how does it feel? Is it like flying and jumping on soft fluffy clouds?? Is it like riding a bike with them or cuddling while staring into each others eyes. My names Casimir, I go to the 9th grade, I'm just young but I know what I want, I can't get it though... not after this. I guess you can say I'm the loner, no one ever talks to me, it's fine, I'm fine... I have this one girl in my history class that I like, please , who would like me? She's beautiful, she's kind, she's funny, and she's smart.. I've liked her ever since 6th grade, those feelings stayed tight in my heart , I tried making them fade but it's always no... "Hey Cas, mind if I sit here?" Divine asked, "Oh uh yeah go ahead" I replied, I stared at her for the longest, I can't even remember, "Casimir..Casimir..CASIMIR" the teacher shouted, "OH uh yes?" I quickly shouted, embarrassed from what just happened, " I know divine is beautiful but listen up" she replied , the whole class laughed at me, Divine looked at me and smiled, I smiled back, heh , it was time to go home, I didn't like going home, mom would work extra shifts, while I took care of Carlos and Tete, We never had enough money to buy things like others.. I didn't even have a cellphone yet...I always lied to myself saying I didn't need one, but the more I mature the more I think. "TETÉ PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON" I shouted while tete ran around. "IM HOME!!" Mom shouted , "MOMMYYYY" Tete and Carlos screamed, " Hey mom!!" I said, I helped mom with the bit of groceries  we could buy. "Teté where's your clothes?" Mom asked, she looked at me and I Gave her a face expression letting her know I tried. It was the next day, I walked to school, "HEY LOSER" screamed this asshole named derick, I ignored it, I went into history class and there she was, Divine.. "ughhh move" shouted shiyene, "s-sorry shi-" I said until I was interrupted by, Jake, her boyfriend, "Move you bastard". He complained. I quickly went to my seat, beside Divines heh,  It was after school, again... I walked home but something caught my attention, a stray cat sitting alone beside the neighbors fence..."poor kitty" I said, "your all lone a arent you? Don't worry I always am lonely too.." I talked to the cat, I'm sure a car passed by and scared the kitty away while I was talking to it, I turned around and started heading toward the road, crossing the street, but while I was crossing it, "WATCH OUT" I heard, then everything was black... I woke up in a hospital room, heh no one was their, I didn't could much, mom needed to feed Carlos and Tete. "Can i leave?" I said as the nurse walked in the room, "With a broken arm? No thank you" she replied. I just wished I could have gone back in time, I'm so stupid, but wait who was that person. I heard before...this. "By the way, there is someone here apparently she knows you"the nurse randomly said, great a visitor, "uhm ok" I replied, the nurse walked out and I just sat there patiently waiting for that "someone" as I heard the door creak open ...it was her, "hey?sorry I came in such a disturbing time" she said "n-no worries" I said, oh lord was I blushing?? She was just so beautiful I didn't think she would come. "Uhm I saw everything, I shouted but I guess I was too late" she said, "WAIT THAT WSD YOU?" I shouted, "Sorry.." I quickly said, "yeah, I know I know I was stupid for just shouting and standing there" she said , "oh it's okay" I said. We stared into each other's eyes, her blue ocean eyes, my green nature eyes, perfect match? Again, he was with her, I'm so stupid for thinking she could ever love me.. the more we stared the more we came closer, I could feel her breath on me, everything was perfect of hers, my lips we about to touch onto hers..until the door was opened...great, "Okay lovebirds , visiting ours are over" the nurse said, "well bye!" Divine said as she left the room, "Why you had to ruin the time" I accidentally said out loud thinking it was in my head, "well I'm sorry" the nurse said , "s-sorry" I said , "doctor said you'll have to stay here for a couple of weeks because we still have some examines to do on you young one" the nurse said, "WHAT NO I NEED TO SEE MY FAMILY" I quickly stood up, "sorry kiddo, doctors order, now sit back down" she replied... dad I wish you were here, I closed my eyes and lied down, slowly everything came to and end, no I wasn't dead I was just asleep.. sadly. It was a couple of weeks later and to be honest, it wasn't bad to be here, I felt loved and cared for, but today was my last day and I would go home, the nurse came in and told me to get dressed in some clothes she bought with her own money for me, it was embarrassing for people to know my families financial problems, as I was walking out the door of the hospital I looked back and hugged the nurse, "thank you" I whispered , I soon left the hospital, home I guess.