Elegant Affair

III.VI

We had breakfast with Gio and Esme after. Buti na lang no one made things awkward, or point out the awkward. Esme was throwing me some looks but I know she'd ask me the question if she has some.

"What did you tell Matteo?" I asked him while the boys were hanging out in the living room, watching a soccer game. It's still Sunday, so they can enjoy all they want-also why I don't get Matteo coming here today. Alam ko namang aalis siya bukas dahil Lunes na naman.

"I told him you weren't okay yesterday. I didn't go into details, kaibigan ko kayong pareho. Even if you are my closest friend, I still don't want to take sides... not that it's needed. But I'd take your's if I really had to." Napatawa na lang ako sa dinagdag niya.

"He didn't have to come here. It's just too much effort."

"Exactly, he didn't have to but he did."

"I think I know where you're leading this conversation."

She stopped scooping the cookies she was about to bake. Though I don't know if those would taste good because this is the first time I'm seeing her do it. Natutuwa lang daw kasi siya na may oven sa bahay ni Gio.

"I think I know where you two are heading."

Here we go again. This is exactly why I want privacy and have the chance to act how I want to be without minding what others may think. It's not complicated but it's hard to explain. Naisip ko talaga noon na kami lang ang makakaintindi. In our own little world, only we'd know.

"Ugh, sumasakit ang ulo ko pag pinag-uusapan ito."

She handed me one of the cookies after it was baked which I gladly accepted. "Are you seeing other guys?"

"No." Nang tikman ko iyon, I wonder why it was bland. "Are you sure you put the right amount of ingredients like I don't know... sugar?"

"Damn!" Napatawa ako nang tingnan ang reaksyon niya. Her eyes were so wide looking at the lacking ingredient in a bowl. "Did I just freaking waste all these- ang tanga!"

"Anything wrong?" Matteo entered the room looking weirdly at Esme who was looking at the bland cookies with a soulless stare.

"Cookies!" Parang bata na dumating din si Gio but when he tried to snatch one, Esme slapped his hand. "Ouch! Why would you do that?"

"I think I just baked my first diet cookies."

Even with Esme's diet cookies, things ended up with Matteo baking another batch while we just hang out in the kitchen talking about the one friend who couldn't make it because he was too busy dealing with his hangover. Everything needs to be scheduled with Steve.

It was already a bit late kaya hindi na kami doon kumain. We just divided the cookies and drove home. I was also hoping Matteo and I can go back together so Esme and Gio can't ambush one of us with questions. I wouldn't mind but Matteo's tired and I still have something to do today. I've been canceling this for a while now. I know I couldn't escape it.

"Matteo..." tawag ko sa kaniya bago siya makapasok sa sasakyan niya. Now that I'm thinking about this, hindi na lang pala ako sasabay sa kaniya. I'll just get my keys back from Gio. Sabi niya kasi pwede niyang ipabalik iyon sa driver niya mamaya. "May dadaanan lang ako. I'll use my car."

"I can drive you there. Di ba nakay Gio na ang susi mo?"

I nodded. "Kukunin ko lang. No need for you to drive me there. Just rest for now."

"Hintayin na kita, Lav. Nakatulog naman na ako sa eroplano. Nakatulog din ako sandali kanina while waiting for you to wake up. I don't really mind."

I sighed. He can't come with me. Not today. "I'm going to my grandmother's house, Matteo," I said in defeat, thinking that statement would stop him from insisting.

"I'll go with you then."

My Lola still lives in her house. Nang makarating ako doon, as expected, she was watering the plants in her garden. This has always been a part of her afternoon routine. Nasa likod niya naman ang caregiver niya. She looks well and healthy... I'm glad to see so.

"Lola," I called and her face beamed upon seeing me. The smile on her face made me hesitant to come closer, scared that I would ruin it but she walked towards me kaya lumapit na din ako sa kaniya. "Mano po."

"Lavender!" She hugged me tightly "I missed you, iha." She was just like her old self.

I was guilty all of a sudden that I rarely visit her. There's no better excuse, really. Sometimes, Lola would come to our family dinner but I would rarely see her. I should've made more effort but I feel even more like a bad granddaughter just thinking about this now.

"Come have tea with me here in the garden. The weather's so nice today, isn't it?"

I nodded along and followed her. Inatasan niyang magtimpla ng tsaa ang isa sa mga katulong niya. I was just silent and smiled as much as I can while Lola talks about the flowers in her garden.

"Is there anything you need to tell me?" She said slowly and carefully. I wonder if I look too worried or she can see right through me just like before.

"Lola..." I said. "I'm pregnant."

The first thing that Lola did was smile so widely. She covered her parted lips with her hands and her eyes were filled with tears. Papa told me I should be ashamed but at this moment, I'm happy. I'm really happy especially after seeing Lola's reaction.

"Talaga? Congratulations, iha."

I was too happy that I can't help but tear up also. At first, it was tears of joy, and looking at her more, it became sad tears. After seeing her wrinkled tears and grey hair, I was reminded of everything she's been through. How she would never tell us the story of her hardships. It was always Papa who reminded me how life has been hard for their family after Matteo's grandfather ruined their business and just harder and harder after that.

"Thank you, Lola..." I wiped the tears from her eyes. Thankful that today was a wonderful day. Nakausap ko ang lola ko and she's healthy and happy as well. "And I'm sorry, Lola."

"Why would you say that? This is a gift. What about the father? Tinutulungan ka ba niya?"

"Yes, Lola. His name is Matteo. He's actually here with me."

"Really? Bakit di mo pinapasok? Poor boy. Go ahead and call him for a cup of tea."

Maybe I'm cold-hearted for not understanding and following my father for being here but this selfishness made me feel so relieved. At the same time, I felt bad that I'm relieved that even when Lola's lucid today, I'm taking advantage of her dementia. 

I'm just trying really hard to make the world a better place for our baby because no one's leaving, no one's running away.