♤Alice Voltaire's Journal♤《PART ONE》{Previously "A Nekomimi's Diary"}

♡ 11/5/2021-11/11/2021 ♡

11/5/2021:

Today wasn't the greatest.

First off, before I even start anything, this chapter will contain talk of periods and feminine crap. As much as I wish I didn't have periods, the only other option as a female Nekomimi would be to have heats. Which I definitely don't want.

Either way, this chapter is discussing some controversial girl things, so feel free to leave at any time.

My period started at school today and I was unprepared. I at least didn't leak, because I can very easily tell when mine is starting. I get really bad cramps at the start of mine. The only issue is with how heavy mine are, and finding a proper pad other than my liner quick enough.

Before you say anything, no, I do not use tampons. And most likely I never will. I'm not sticking some foreign object inside me.

Of course I didn't leak or anything, but the main problem was the cramps. They felt like someone was using my uterus as a flipping stress ball. AND I had PE today. I didn't want to miss out on class, so I sucked it up, but at the same time I had no focus and it hurt 24/7.

Other than my feminine problems, the only other thing that happened today was that the Avian pictures were suddenly gone. When I asked a few teachers around, they said the "state government" required they be taken down. Pretty sure it was AWTOK.

But of course, teachers can't disclose that.

11/6/2021:

My ward of the church keeps getting smaller and smaller everyday. I can't tell whether that's good or bad.

On one hand, if my ward fails to the point of no return, services will be canceled. But the reason for them getting smaller is because the families are moving. And usually, these families have small kids, too.

Today I said my last goodbyes to another family. They're probably at least the seventh one.

And no matter where they move, the church stays the same. It's not getting any smaller. Plus, no cute kids who seem to be the only ones at my church who understand me?

I think this is all a bad thing. A really bad thing.

11/7/2021:

In a way, church (or at least, my church) is like communism. I know, big stretch. But think about it.

The church tells you that God loves everyone equally: and that each job gets the same rewards. In a way, that's like communism, where each job is paid the same.

My church does the same thing: instead of doing things for yourself, you're always doing them for "the greater good of God" or some cheesy message. In communism, you're always doing things for the "greater good of the country", rather than yourself.

It eventually gets tiring.

11/8/2021:

The two girls who posted those Avian pictures didn't show up to school today. I worry AWTOK did something to them, but maybe I'm looking too much into things. If they don't show up tomorrow or Wednesday either (since today's Monday), and the teacher in charge of our shared class doesn't say they're quarantining, I'm going to assume something bad happened to them.

This is also a good teaching opportunity for readers out there -- I write this public journal, but I keep many details about my life out to keep me safe. I don't go out in public and do brash things for the sake of Mythicals.

I like the idea those two girls had, but they were extremely obvious about it. If they wanted a more safe alternative, they could have posted the posters somewhere outside of school, where cameras aren't located.

I hope they're okay.

11/9/2021:

The Avian supporting kids weren't at school today either. I have a really bad feeling about all this.

Like there is something I don't quite understand yet. A missing piece in the big puzzle.

Mimi and Buddy could sense my discomfort -- even if nobody else at school could. Even my human friends couldn't tell something was off.

I may or may not have cried a bit. I haven't cried in a really long time, so it was a good stress reliever. But I'm glad I have the cats there to support me, even if they're just cats. I feel like I have one foot (or a metaphorical paw) in the human world.

And one in the cat one.

11/10/2021:

Before I start the main topic I wanted to discuss, I will say that the Avian supporting kids have still not appeared.

What's more frightening is that nobody seems to know where they went. But for now, all I can do is use this as a sign to always be cautious.

The main topic I wanted to actually discuss was "Multi-Breeds". Multi-Breeds is the name I know them by, but please let me know in the comments about other names for them.

Multi-Breeds are basically Mythicals with multiple Mythical types. For example, that one kid who claims they're both vampire and werewolf and all these other edgy things. Of course, that's an awful stereotype, as it puts them in a bad light with things that are, more often than not, completely untrue.

Technically, I am a Multi-Breed: as both a Nekomimi and a Neko Shapeshifter, I technically have two species. But many Multi-Breeds have more than two; usually around three, actually. Each type contains a different form, and your human form is not considered a part of this list.

I'm including all of this because I'm debating whether I have a third type or not. Maybe even a fourth. And because Multi-Breeds are probably one of the more controversial topics in the Mythical Community, I'd say.

In more specific terms, I'm debating if I have any fox/kitsune related forms "inside of me", so to speak. I think it's just one form (compared to two), that one being a Kitsunemimi. I still need to think about this all a little, and investigate, before I decide whether I have a third Mythical form. If I do, I'd still consider my main form a Nekomimi, and wouldn't change the title of this book.

Besides, letting the public know so outright might cause more issues than helps.

11/11/2021:

I don't have school today, so I can't see if those kids came back or not, but I'm starting to lose hope about them ever coming back.

I also have an update on my third type: I have narrowed it down to me being a Kitsunemimi.

At first, I was doubting it. One of the big thoughts I was considering was that I just wanted bigger/fluffier Nekomimi features. But in my confusion, I decided to watch videos of actual foxes in the wild. This is a method I see commonly for those questioning their Mythical type.

And of course, I felt a significant and notable connection.

It's important to note that I did not have these thoughts and decide all of this in one day. I'd been having thoughts on whether or not I was a fox-related Mythical for probably a few weeks now. But I kept pushing them away, trying to embrace what I already had and appreciate my Neko side.

Appreciate that I am a Mythical at all.

But I've realized that pushing away your true self isn't really the right thing to do. It just causes more confusion and sadness in the end. If any of you out there are humans, debating if you're any type of Mythical: go for it. Watch videos, learn habits, find yourselves in these species. You'll learn a lot about yourself as you do.

I have some of the specifics on my Kitsunemimi type, too: I think I have somewhere from one to three tails, and my coat is still, like my cat form, pure white.

The last point I am going to make is that, if you don't believe in Multi-Breeds, or feel that I am making things "too complicated", feel free to leave of your own will. I don't want to start fights and controversies, and nobody (I hope) is forcing you to stay here. Mythicals are all about freedom anyway.

And the real world isn't as simple as society would like it to be.